Cute kid stories

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
1

My son is just over 2 years old. He enjoyed Christmas a great deal. It’s amusing to watch him play with the gifts he got, the best one is a Little Tikes tool bench. He has oversize pegs to pound, big screws to rotate and a whole bench to drag around. Me watching him just totally enjoy his simple toys gives me as close as reason to believe in a benevolent God as I’ve experienced in a long time. Watching…no, experiencing Jimmy is as close to heaven as I can conceive.
That being said, there are certain things that he does that just have Gingy and I in stitches. That is what this thread is about. All of you naysayers WRT kids can just butt out. This is a thread for parents to share those things your kids do that just amaze you, amuse you and leave you with your jaw dropping thinking “where did s/he learn that???” I’ll start with three:

#1: “oh no”. Jesus, this just slays me. When something goes wrong for Jimmy, he cries out “Oh no!”. We could be cuddling before bed and the toy he had a few minutes ago is not right at hand. It could be that he misplaced his sippy cup. It could be almost anything. Regardless, he gets this look on his face, eyes wide, and cries “Oh no!” The pure honesty of his dismay at losing the object of his immediate attention just kills me. “Oh no!”. I wish things were that simple for me.

#2: “Ta Dah!” Somewhere back in my son’s lineage is a circus performer. That’s the only explanation I can think of for his “Ta dah!” He will do something-it doesn’t matter what, peepee potty, walk down the stairs, put two cups inside each other, anything…and then he’ll look at you and throw his arms up saying “Ta Dah!” He is quite aware what he is doing, and he honestly revels in your reaction. Still, I have no idea where he gets it from. “Ta dah!” is far from the worst way to spend your life. Food for thought.

#3: “thank you daddy” This one comes completely out of left field. My son has a harmonica that one of our friends left here a couple of years ago. He loves to blow through it to hear the sound it makes. A few weeks ago, he was standing at the top of the stairs in our house. He had the harmonica in one hand and he was holding the stair railing in the other. He blew through the harmonica as clear as day and then slowly turned towards me. He opened his mouth and said…“Thank you daddy”. Man. “thank you daddy” is all I’ve ever worked for all my life. It’s kinda fun when you get it.

2

Those are sweet! I really hope you’ve got a video camera, you need to record this stuff. I agree, these moments are golden.

Watching my twins interact is hilarious. They can be so supportive of one another, “Dat good job, Bice!” “Tank you, Zoe.” “Ooh, you wekkum.”

Then he’ll do something to piss her off (he’s a toy thief through and through) and she’ll chew his ass. Her little baby face gets all cross and she furrows her brow, “You tink dat funny? Dat not funny!”
The other day she found the Barney DVD that I thought I’d managed to lose, and asked to watch “Barneysucks”. I’d forgotten that I had taught her that.
My son’s been warned about cussing - he says “damn” once in a great while. He must have done so recently, and my husband reminded him he should especially NOT say “damn” around my uptight Aunt. I put him on the phone to talk to her yesterday, and he shouts “Hi DARN Soosie! I watching DARN TV!”

3

About a week ago, I was tucking my 6 1/2-year-old into bed. He said to me, “It seems like it’s easier to be a kid than it is to be an adult. Because when you’re a kid you don’t have to take care of anybody else. Except if [as an adult] you don’t know how to cook. Then you’d be hungry all the time.”

I told him that it sounds like he’s got childhood and adulthood just about figured out.

4

These are so cute! I especially love the twins encouraging each other.

We’re big on “natural consequences” type parenting and we tend to give 3 year old Chloe choices, rather than phrasing things as orders. So we’ll say, “There are two options - come here now or sit in the naughty spot.” Last week I started, "There are two options - " and she interrupted, “NO! There are FIVE options!”

A few months ago, her father jokingly “tried” to put her in the trunk of the car instead of her seat. She said, “Daddy, you can’t put me in the trunk - I’m not groceries!”

5

I went over to see my two-year-old cousin yesterday and took along my Jack Russel Terrier because I knew she’d enjoy playing with him.

The dog was sitting on my lap and she came over to pet him, babbling a mile a minute.

“Is this your doggie?” she demanded.

“Yes, it is,” I replied.

“I have a doggie,” she announced. “My doggie name is Maggie.”

“I know,” I said playfully.

“Does your doggie have ears?”

“Yes,” I said, pointing at them and giving one a little wiggle.

“Does he have a nose?”

“Yep, right here.”

She reached out and lifted his tail. “Does he have a butt?”

I struggled not to smile. “Yes, he does. Every living thing has a butt.”

“I have a butt,” she confided and reached out to prod the dog’s chest with a finger.

It was harder not to smile. “Yes, everybody’s got a butt.”

“Doggies don’t wipe,” she informed me.

Cousin Lissa coughed a few times and struggled to keep control of her face. “Need tissue?” the baby asked.

“No, thank you. I’m fine.”

“I get you tissue,” she announced, and toddled off to do just that. On her return, she said, “I give Maggie and you take her to your house and I keep your doggie. I like your doggie. He sit still and let me poke him.”

“I like him, too.”

“He good doggie?”

“Yes, he is. That’s why I want to keep him.”

She considered for a moment. “I give you cannie.” (Candy.)

“That’s a wonderful offer, but I think I’ll keep him.”

Realizing she was defeated, she said, “Okay,” and resumed gently prodding the dog.

6

I love these stories.

I have a 2-year-old son who is saying and doing a lot of the same things as your son, Dave. At Christmastime, we had a party to go to at my in-laws’ house. We were late, as usual (once you have more than one child, late is the new on time) so everyone was gathered when we arrived. My boy runs into the room where all the adults are, assumes a pose with his knees bent and his arms raised, and yells, “Turprise!!!”

I also have a 4-year-old daughter. I am somewhat under the weather this morning, so she got dressed up in the doctor’s scrubs costume she got for Christmas and tended to me. Her bedside manner is impeccable, right down to covering me with her favorite blanket and bringing me all sorts of plastic food to pretend eat.

7

WhyBaby’s at that age where she’s talking a whole heck of a lot, but no one knows what she’s saying yet. But her inflections are dead on.

A few weeks ago, she came to sit on my lap at the desk (a cute maneuver on it’s own. It consists of spinning my chair with me in it so my knees are available, then turning her back to me and backing in like an 18-wheeler until I pick her up.) and she picked up the phone.

Tucking the phone into her shoulder, she said, “Babble. Babblebabble ishkababble babble BEE!” then reached for a pencil from the pencil cup and started making marks on the notepad. “Babble blabble bleeep scrabble babble…Bye!” Put away the pencil, put the phone on the charging stand and got off my lap and wandered away.

I wonder who her appointment is with? :smiley:

8

One of the favorite Christmas presents my nieces got was a play phone. Younger niece interacted with the phone something like this. “Bring Bring Bring Bring”(picks up phone) “Bring Bring Babble Scrabble” hangs up (or carries phone around on shoulder for next 15 minutes).

Big sister, on the other hand, has realistic conversations with “Grandma Lastname, the one with the doggies”. Only one problem. Grandma Lastname is NOT the one with the doggies. (Grandma Lastname is my mother, niece’s paternal grandmother. The grandma who has the doggies is her maternal grandmother. They have a DIFFERENT last name.)

9

You know what? I screwed that last story up. When Jimmy said “Thank you”, I didn’t make it clear that it was 100% obvious that he was saying thank you the way a performer thanks a crowd. I mean, that was IT, I think he even bowed slightly. It was goddamndest thing I have ever seen. I have a little Elvis. “Thank you, thank you very much”.

(It’s still a moment that I’ve worked for all my life. :slight_smile: )

10

I didn’t witness this myself, but my uncle loves telling this story about his niece and nephew(my cousins). They’re twins. This happened when they were both quite young; before either of them was talking. Both of them are sitting at this little table playing on their own while the adults were all talking. Each of them had exactly 8 little toy cars. At one point the girl quickly looked around to see if she was being watched, and then snatched one of her brother’s cars. 9-7. He screamed, and the adults all turned and looked, saw that they were both sitting their nicely, and went back to talking(all except for my uncle, who’d been watching the whole time). As soon as the adults had their backs turned again, the girl stole another car. 10-6. The brother screamed, and again the adults didn’t see anything amiss, and went back to talking again. So the girl swoops in and steals another one. 11-5. This time, the boy has had enough and leans in and slaps his sister. She screams, and their parents step in and drag him off to yell at him. Once they’re gone, the girl leans in and takes the rest of the cars! :stuck_out_tongue:

11

My oldest son was about two-and-a-half, and was supposed to be taking his nightly bath. My wife and I were sitting in the bedroom talking, when we heard an “a-hem” from the doorway.

We look over, and there’s my son, stark naked except for his underpants, which he is wearing on his head. Once he sees he has our attention, he started doing a little skipping dance and singing, to the tune of the Hallelujah Chorus, “Dancing underwear, dancing underwear …” :dubious:

Then, he turned around and went back to the bathroom. I’m still not entirely what the heck that was, other than hilarious.

12

Hey All!
Lurker here that just subscribed so I can add this story…
When my oldest daughter was about 5 years old I had just started to practice meditation. One day when the baby was down for a nap I asked my daughter if she thought she could entertain herself and tell anyone who called I would get back to them and try not bother Mom for a little while as I was going to meditate.
Some time after I was done, a friend called and asked what I had been up to. It seems the friend had called earlier and when she asked my daughter what I was doing she said

“I don’t know. She’s in her room doing something that starts with an “M” and she doesn’t want to be disturbed.”

She was such an interesting child. In preschool she had to wear a nametag because she would get mad if you didn’t call her “Ariel” or whatever her name was that day. :rolleyes:

13

Back when my kids were still kids, we were trying to potty train my younger son, “M”. It wasn’t working so well. Eventually we had the idea to bribe him with jellybeans and employ his older brother “D” for peer pressure. It worked great.

D was constantly trying to talk him into going to the bathroom. They each got 1 jellybean if M would pee, and 2 if he pooped. So D was very motivated to help. He would stand nearby and cheer him on, “come on M, poop!”

Finally the bid day arrived and they came running out of the bathroom ecstatic - M had pooped! He had the bowl in hand to prove it. I asked, “Are you kidding?” Little M replied, “No, see, I really pooped - two meats and a corn!!!”

And that was worth 3 jellybeans each!

14

I can’t leave this thread without including my daughter, who was a very outspoken child. She embarrassed me on a regular basis, in a cute way.

Once at about the age of 2, while cruising the grocery store in the shopping cart, she spotted a man in boots and a western hat. H pointed and shouted “Look Mom, it’s a cowboy!” Same day, same store, we come around the end of an aisle and I see an Amish couple headed our way. I tried to bypass the row before she spotted them, but I was too late. “Look Mom, it’s the Pilgrams!”

When her brother was in Kindergarten he brought home every parents nightmare - head lice. And of course, H had a few herself. So I hauled her down to the local Osco while the boys were at school to get some Rid. She greeted everyone we passed with “Hi, my name is H, and I have head lights!”

But none of that even touched the embarrassment that my sister-in-laws mother must have felt many years ago. SIL told the story of getting into an elevator with her mom when she was very tiny, roughly 50 years ago. The only other person on board was the elevator operator, an African American man. My SIL looked the man over very closely, then finally licked his arm. She turned to her mom in complete exasperation and proclaimed “He is NOT chocolate flavored Momma!”

15

Ohhhhhhhhhhh lordy. I remember reading a column in which the author relates that a little kid was looking at her wide-eyed once, and then finally ventured, “Êtes-vous un chocolat ?”

“Non, je suis… une da - me…”

16

Jeesh, I think *embarrassing *kid stories could fill up a whole thread! Maybe even Embarrassing Racial Events With Kids… Here’s mine:

A black woman, who we didn’t know, was nursing her baby in a waiting room (modestly covered, but it was obvious what was going on and no one cared a whit) when my goddaughter, about 3, wandered over to her knee and asked, “Does your baby drink chocolate milk?” Thinking that she was asking about drinking cow’s milk from a cup, the lady said “no, just my milk.” “But don’t you have chocolate milk in your breasties?” she persisted.

The second story goes back in time to 1978 or so. Starring me as a four year old in a grocery store in the whitest white bread town you can imagine. The first black person I ever saw, and I was staring like 4 year olds are wont to do, when suddenly I blurted out to my mother (in that very shrill, very loud 4 year old girl voice that carries clear across a grocery store): “Mommy? Why is that lady all DIRTY?!”

:smack:

17

I wasn’t there (I don’t even think I was born yet!) but my mom has a fun story about being in the grocery store check-out line, loading her things onto the belt when my very young brother points to the (very dark) black man behind them in line and asks, “Mommy, what’s THAT?!?!”

Apparently the man laughed and my mom (a very well-spoken teacher) got to give her toddler a lesson about the great variety in the human race right there in the grocery store.