Zyada and I arrived at Razzoo’s at 5:50 PM–10 minutes early. Yes, we’re really Dopers. Should we be ashamed of our punctuality? We go in and get a table, informing the host en passant that we’re the Adams group–“Addams family, got it.”–and more of us should be along soon.
<self-referential third-person>
5:55 PM
Balance: “Do you suppose everyone will show up on time this time as well?”
Zyada: “We had our one-in-a-thousand last week. Don’t expect too much.”
JimB arrives.
6:00 PM
JimB delivers impassioned monologue on the inattentiveness of other drivers. JimB lives minutes away from Razzoo’s. Balance vows to organize a get-together somewhere less than 50 freakin’ minutes from his place, just for a change.
Concepts of punctuality are discussed (as no one else has arrived yet). IFGS time (an hour late is still early) is compared to Hawaiian time (there is no late, only time).
Waitress takes drink orders–informs Zyada that they don’t serve a pina colada on the rocks, but they’ll fake it. Balance orders a Swamp Thing (a drink best left to the imaginations of non-Cajuns–it has both rum and tequila), and JimB (as usual) has a beer.
A discussion of the merits of hopless beers ensues, with JimB defending the position that without hops, it ain’t beer. Zyada insists that hopless beer is much better (not bitter). Balance’s contribution is that you should avoid African mamba beers, both hopped and hopless, as they lunge so far across the threshold of vileness as to be indistinguishable.
6:15 PM
Zyada still wants to know if anyone else remembers Morticia Addams’s sister, the bubbleheaded blonde hippie with daisies in her hair (which were somehow inextricably linked with her legs).
<inexplicable segue>
A discussion of the relative merits of common vs. uncommon names develops–do spelling and pronunciation errors outweigh the benefits of having a name that you don’t share with 50-60% of the population of the same sex? No consensus was reached; anecdotes abounded. Balance was nearly awarded someone else’s diploma in college–all three names matched.
No other Dopers have arrived. The waitress seems interested in taking a food order. “No thanks, we’ll just keep drinking.”
6:45 PM
The discussion wandered into the difficulties of registering for classes in college, with asides about professors’ accents (Balance demonstrates several) and the need for separate telephone exchanges for radio stations.
Went and looked in the bar for missing Dopers. Decided to wait a bit longer–maybe they hadn’t noted the time properly or somesuch.
JimB is on his 3rd beer. Zyada is on her 3rd “Malibou” (a pina colada on the rocks, apparently). Balance is still working on his Swamp Thing–the red and blue sectors have mixed nicely now. Zyada still views it with some trepidation. The waitress is clearly wondering why we aren’t just sitting in the bar. “No, we’re still waiting on the rest of the Adams group.”
Next week’s outing to Hawkwood is discussed. Balance and Zyada commit to showing up in garb. Balance promises to try to remember his camera for a change. Tie-in to board foibles through Zyada’s “Hawkwook” typo. Balance describes an image of Chewbacca with a bandolier full of birds that struck him on first reading. All three agree that, while it’s frustrating to notice an spelling/typing error after posting, it’s seldom worthwhile to post a correction afterwards.
Board “sins” enter the discussion. Zyada admits to “occasionally” searching for her name to see if anyone is talking about her. Balance and JimB point out that they couldn’t do so effectively even if they so chose. Balance admits to replying without reading the entire thread “every now and then”. JimB admitted to ending a post in GD with “DavidB’s arrogance doesn’t bother me”, and never looking at the thread (or posting in GD) again.
Crosshairs next centered on responses in GQ. The pattern was agreed to be:
Question
Joke
Answer
“I’m glad [poster X] answered this, but…<3 pages of complex tangential information>”
Tangential information picked apart by another poster
Abstruse theory debated
Naive poster asks “What does this have to do with the OP’s question?”
Universal response: “This is more interesting!”
7:45 PM
Other Dopers given up as lost–maybe Farris’ apartment was just too dirty, and Skyslash had another little fender-bender. Besides, everyone’s hungry–we order; the waitress appears relieved. Balance explains that “zydeco” is not accented like “art deco”. Correction noted for future orders.
7:55 PM
Eating. Very little discussion occurs–mostly comments about “hot” vs. “spicy” foods. Indian cuisine is discussed.
8:20 PM
Balance attempts to interest Zyada in the IFGS–she claims to be burnt out on roleplaying, but live-action RPGs are a bit different. Balance promises that there are always roles for female dancers (even if he has to invent them on the spot). Balance explains the perfidious influence of “EverCrack”–that scourge of all real roleplaying often misnamed as “EverQuest”.
8:30 PM
Dessert. Balance puts on Dublin accent in response to implications that he is the “logical Irishman” for this event, as he took notes. Zyada invites JimB and Balance to a dance recital–details to follow. As JimB and Balance both appreciate artistry (and appreciate lightly-clad women even more), both seem to consider the matter seriously. Balance will probably attend.
8:45 PM
End of Doper Dinner. Fond farewells, until next weekend.
</self-referential third-person>
