I was thinking that today I’d go out and buy an Xbox 360.
Well, scratch that. I’ve got the money… but every time I try to go spend on anything, I start to get a nasty, dead, empty feeling in my chest. Even spending on, say, lunch, or the odd drink feels hollow. And bad. N’ stuff.
I can’t count the number of times I’ve gone out to buy something - pretty much anything other than the absolutely neccessary (I can manage to spend on expensive things I must get like it or not, like my car or my textbooks). Anything else, I just feel like a douche just for trying.
Fuck. I was all set, I knew what I wanted. It was absolutely rational… but I just feel like I was taking cash and burning it, or throwing gold coins into the sea.
Sadly, I suffer from both sides of this affliction – if it’s something for me, I have a hard time doing it, unless it is something actually functional (clothing, shoes, and the like are functional, even if I just *like *them). I also do “retail therapy” but it almost always works out as me buying stuff for other people. This weekend, I was in a major slump – I spent about $40 on the kids (who are both now heavy into M:tG) getting them booster packs and starter decks, and felt like a heel for the $4 booster pack I bought myself. Ugh! Damned if you do, damned if you don’t.
I currently have a bunch of money saved in a “piggy bank” (actually two.)
Between the two I have close to - well I’ll just say it is a lot.
I want to spend it on something frivolous.
Whenever I decide I’m going to, I can’t decide. At this point I keep thinking that If I’m gonna blow all my piggy bank dough, it damn-well better be something I’m gonna love.
I applaud the OP. If you don’t really need it, don’t spend on it. I’ve certainly spent lots of money frivolously in the past, but these days, I’m much more responsible. I get pretty much all of my new stuff (for my hobbies) in trade.
If your compulsion to save is interfering with your daily life (and since you mentioned buying lunch, I think it is) you might wanna talk to somebody about it. I realize you’re talking to us, but I mean a real-life person like a therapist. You mention textbooks, is there a free mental health clinic on campus?
Channeling Ann Landers aside, I do understand what you mean. I’ve had trouble buying anything frivolous since last fall. Have you always been like this or is it new?
I struggle with tightwad tendencies as well. Even when I really want something, I have a hard time actually buying it, especially if I’ve recently said no to the kids. I keep a list of things I want to buy sometime…currently it says sweater, sneakers, and laundry hamper. Wild frivolity! But I could just sew up the hole in my old sweater for the tenth time, wear the cruddy old sneakers till they fall off my feet, and throw the laundry on the floor. That would be the green thing to do…
I’m just like the OP; and the thing is, whenever I’m in a bad mood, my wife tries to buy me stuff. I mean, God damn it, woman! Wasting money only makes me feel worse!
At least you get the pangs before you buy. I get 'em after, so I’m both out a bunch of money, and can’t enjoy what I bought because I feel guilty for buying it.
I’m with Locrian…life is short, and I tend to spend as it comes. Despite myself, I manage to keep enough put away for a real emergency. But for the short term, easy come, easy go. Well, easy go at least…
And Khadaji? If you decide that something you’d absolutely love would be sharing it with another, PM me.
I have the same problem as the OP. But I’ve managed to solve it a bit, I think.
Like they say to do with a tattoo, I give it a lot of thought. Think of something I want. If I still reeeeallly want it just as bad in a month or six months or a year, I get it.
But I only get it after all the necessities are paid for, and I have the cash for it. I bought my Wii around Christmas but only after I had cash in the bank for it, plus cash for a bunch of upcoming expenses. When I was done I still had plenty left. Right now I’m saving up for a deck in the backyard, so I won’t be spending cash on anything fun for a while.
My husband does that, too. When I am in a mood, he will spend money on me – which makes me feel worse. Then, because I know he is like that, I don’t know if I should buy him things when he is in a mood. UGH!
Though I’m not a big extravagant spender at all (I’m generally very thrifty and careful), I do agree that money was intended to be spent. It’s what it’s for, and even money “wasted” is now in circulation to be used by other people and keeps business turning over.
Such is my simplistic view of finance and economics.
I thought of this thread when I was buying Mom her mother’s day gift - I realized I’m only thrifty as it regards to me. When I’m buying for others I have a devil-may-care attitude on cost.
