Tonight’s the night!
Rumor has it that Nancy O’Dell’s replacement is going to be Melissa, the dumpee in what truly was The Most Shocking Bachelor Finale Ever! (Am I going to be the only one to admit I saw said show?)
And Twickster’s rumor had it correct. Also, Melissa appears to be something of a ringer; no way someone with no previous dance experience comes out like that after only two days’ practice. OK, so she says it was ballet rather than Ballroom, but still.
I’m optimistic that this will be a decently competetive season, as the majority of the pairs seem to be starting off more or less even. Everyone seems to have a bit of work cut out for them, with no clear standouts. Lawrence Taylor, for example, seems to be the least natural of all the footballers who have been on. Denise Richards actually has the look about right, but seemed terrified. Liked the gymnast kid.
Line of the night came early on, when Li’l Kim announced that she’d become a big fan of the show…in jail. She was a bit surprising, as was, wait for it…Steve-O. This guy may be a sleeper, folks. He actually appears to be in pretty good shape and although no doubt he and his partner will drive the judges nuts with non-standard routines, I thought they make a pretty entertaining pair.
Beefcake guy…uh, Gilles, has some potential. Cheryl was astute in saying that they’ll have to sex it up if they have any hope of staying on, due to a (presumed) lack of fan base.
I think David Alan Grier will be a hoot if he can stay on a few weeks.
Holly was meh, but not actually horrible.
I kinda had high hopes for Belinda Carlisle, but she seemed to just let herself get slung around like a sack o’ potatoes by her partner.
Wozniak was clearly the worst; I’m talking Chloris Leachman bad. For the love of all that’s holy, I hope he’s first to go, with the bull rider not far behind.
Whatever else you say about the bullrider, I thought he had the line of the night. Something like “You’re not ‘ready,’ it’s just your turn.”
I thought Wozniak was frikkin’ hysterical – I totally freaked out my cats I was laughing so hard. I hope he stays for at least a week or two, though I know he won’t.
I don’t have a problem with Melissa coming in as a ringer, since she got 2 days (instead of 4 weeks) to practice. I was impressed with her poise and grace – think she’ll at least make it to the halfway point.
As will the gymnast, Lil Kim (whose cousin I think I know – I need to double check that) (well, I know I know the woman, what I need to double-check is whether her rapper cousin is Lil Kim or someone else), Gilles, and David Alan Grier, who was way better than I expected. (Agreed with the judges on the face-making though – very distracting!)
Fun evening – may turn out to be a good season.
Holly Madison and Denise Richards both …danced dumb. That’s the only way my wife and I could describe it. They both looked as vapid on the dance floor as they came off in the interviews. If it wasn’t for the horror that is Wozniak I would want one of these two to get voted off first.
Melissa looked pretty good, and will get votes for a while. I suspect that the set of Bachelor viewers overlaps mightily with the set of DWTS voters. Gilles looked very good, Li’l Kim was surprisingly OK, and I think David Allen Grier will be a real contender if he can get some posture issues straightened out. Deep, deep down inside there’s even a little potential in Ty Murray (he actually displayed some rhythm here and there) but if he doesn’t discover his inner dancer soon, he’s out right after Wozniak.
Is there anyone a little more musically inclined we could get to represent the geeks on next season? Think Wil Wheaton can dance?
That Woz, in addition to being the worst dancer is also the most awkward guy ever, no? That little wave is burned into my brain forever like that time, in 1968, when nobody ate these cookies this kid brought in to kindergarten because they were bigger than average.
Lil Kim was too shy to talk?
Anyway, that was a lot of dancing. Most was terrible. I’m wiped out.
Our local ABC affiliate (being near Silicon Valley, dontcha know) has been teasing the Wozniak connection for days…and just based on the training clips, he had First One to Go branded all over him, and didn’t disappoint.
I just realized we’re missing the obligatory Disney Machine Cross-Over Promotion star. Nobody from an ABC soap opera or a Disney Channel tween star. I guess they’re relieved they were able to shoe-horn Melissa in at the last minute.
Re: Li’l Kim…there was a time when people were ashamed to admit that they’d been in prison. One looks back fondly on those days. (and get off my lawn!)
So I was the only person who was actually entertained by Wozniak?
Ah, well, I’ve always known I had a rather odd sense of humor.
I was astounded how proud Lil Kim seemed to be about her prison time.
Ty Miller was pretty bad, but he tried. He’s as stiff as a board, though. It’s too bad his wife was injured - he probably was doing this for her.
Gilles Whatever - how does he qualify for stardom? I was sort of embarassed for him that Cheryl kept telling him to look more masculine. That would have to hurt.
Shawn Johnson is a stocky little thing, isn’t she? But she has potential.
David Allen Greer’s “comedy” certainly went over his partner’s head. Hopefully he’ll start taking it seriously.
Most of the others just blended together in my mind. It’ll take me a while before I learn who’s who.
StG
No, I really enjoyed him. I hope he sticks around a little longer. Although he does remind me a little of that kid in elementary school that everyone made fun of, but he didn’t know he was being teased, so he just sat there beaming because people were talking to him.
Yeah, I can see where you’d get that vibe – but damn, he was just so totally enjoying himself, it was great. Esp. compared to – as a couple of people have noted – Denise Richards, who looked like she could be anywhere else on the planet, including in a dentist chair having a root canal, and be having more fun.
I enjoyed the season opener, but I also thought they were scraping the bottom of the barrel for “stars.” Who the hell is Gilles? Who’s Melissa? I know who they are now, but it seems like they should call the show Dancing With People You Might Have Heard Of Or Possibly Seen In One Movie.
No one really stuck out as great, although the gymnast and Melissa have potential. As for the guys, I’m pulling for Steve-O or Grier. I have to confess I have a wee Woz crush now. He entertained the heck out of me, plus he came off as just the nicest guy ever. When he mentioned getting married–is he still with Kathy Griffin?
Ack. That Steve-O character has the kind o fface that just makes me want to punch him. Paired with Lacey Schwimmer and I can guarantee you they’ll be the couple I’d most like to see with a torn ACL.
StG
He seemed pretty nice when I met him. After he gave a speech (a version of his autobiography) in our conference facility, he came back to our server room and autographed one of our Apple server boxes. He married someone other than Kathy Griffin.
I developed a huge crush on Chelsey Hightower from SYTYCD, so I might just have to watch this show until her stiff-as-a-board partner is voted off. (Shouldn’t take too long.)
Hey, ever since season one, it’s really been “Dancing” “With” the “Stars” - this is no change.
But last night she seemed to have the same problem that Lacey has… not having quite figured out that she’s not the “Star” and not showcasing (or disguising) her partner’s strengths (or weaknesses) Luckily, she didn’t come across as obnoxious as Lacey does, so it’s not as bad. yet.
You know who he looks like? A very young Jerry Lewis.
Turned on the computer again so I could vote this week – gave all 13 votes to Steve Wozniak. His joy delights me.
A few other comments:
Denise: Much improved, but she’s still stiff as a board. The woman has absolutely no personality. My respect for Charlie Sheen – not particularly high to begin with – plummets that he would have married that woman. I don’t care how pretty she is.
Shawn: What a muscular little thing she is – and she has the most enormous man hands.
Gilles: Doesn’t do a thing for me. Apparently Cheryl is going to drag him into the finals, but I’m not seeing it.
Belinda: What a cruel choice that costume was!
David: Good dancer – I think he’s good for second half of the season.
Steve-O: Lacey, Lacey, Lacey – your second season and you still don’t know that this is a ballroom dance competition. I hope you and Steve-O are eliminated soon and that they don’t ever bring you back again.
Going soon:
Steve W., Steve-O, Holly, Ty, Denise
Hanging in for a while:
Belinda, Chuck, Lawrence, David
Final four:
Lil Kim, Shawn, Gilles, Melissa
Twickster’s final 4 looks about right to me, but of course it’s way early yet. Melissa was just, well, daaayum. I was perplexed by the 9s for Gilles; he seemed to be shambling all over the place to me. Whatever.
Most improved: the bull rider. I’m gonna put my bet on him making it to at least mid-season.
Not too sure on a least improved, but I’ve gotta admit, I won’t miss Holly or Denise when they’re gone.