I believe what Adoptamom did was illeagal, and just plain wrong. You can’t just go around accessing peoples credit rating unless they apply for credit with you. Like when you apply for a credit card you give permission for the card company to check your credit.
But also…
Just befor the fourth date? You invade his privacy and break the law? Did you ever mention to him later that you did it? Because I would have dumped you if I was in his shoes.
Unfortunately, SS can’t give out a person’s SSN to a third party except under extremely limited circumstances; you could get your son’s SSN if you’d forgotten it, but there’s no way they could legally give you his father’s SSN. IIRC from the official guidelines, requests such as yours are told that they should contact the Federal Parent Locator Service for assistance. A quick perusal of the site by me seems to indicate that the state child support office should be able to file an official (court-ordered?) request with SS to get the number.
Or you could find someone who works for SS who’s willing to risk the consequences and look it up for you. :eek:
I lost my wallet last year. It had my son’s and my own social security cards in it. I went to my local SS office to request new copies of them. I was able to get mine, but when it came to getting my son’s, his birth certificate didn’t suffice as a form of ID.
They told me that “a birth certificate only proves that he was born–not that he is still alive.” (exact words)
They guard those numbers with the lives of their children…
Yeah, this was one of the constant gripes I got (and had) with the “replacement SS card” procedures. I think part of the problem is because the rules for what is acceptable ID were written when people didn’t need a SS card until they started working, by which time they usually had some form of ID. When we started issuing SSNs to children, the rules for what constituted acceptable ID were never changed to allow for the fact that few two-year-olds have ID cards. I hope they at least told you what was considered acceptable ID for your son.
The idea that a birth certificate cannot be used as an ID prevents someone from using a birth certificate from a child who died in infancy to get a new SSN, which was a common first step in establishing a false identity. Of course, now that most newborns in the US are issued SSNs, that tactic doesn’t work as well as it used to.
Look around http://www.ssa.gov/ that place is full of info on what to do & who to call.
You could probably make up a contest & write the guy at his mothers house that he has won $50 or $100.00 & all he has to do is complete a little form for tax purposes & put on his SS number. Then you got it, of course, make it legal by giving the guy his money perhaps? 
Yeah, I ended up using his shot record from his pediatrician’s office and a copy of his enrollment documents from pre-school.