Dear Conspiracy Theorists,

The BBQ Pit
1

(Mostly this is a letter to my brother-in-law, but should apply to everyone of his ilk.)

Goddamn, you are fucking idiots. I honestly don’t know how you get by in this world. The naivete which you display is mind blowing. You’re so fucking gullible, I can’t understand how you can discern reality from a comic strip. The government was behind 9/11? Seriously? You come to stay in my home, and take advantage of my hospitality to commandeer my DVD player with your fucking drivel, that has you so convinced, you look at me as if I am close-minded and a sucker for being so trusting of the U.S. government. None the less, I throw out nerf-tosses of critical thinking, that would get a 3rd grader on the right track to seeing the painfully obvious lies that are on display here. But what do you do? You defend this cherry-picked “evidence” and wear you idiocy on your head like a tin foil hat.

Here are some suggestions:
• Learn some basic science. Nothing too crazy, just some junior high level physics, chemistry and math oughta do it. Maybe even some astronomy, because it’s only a matter of time before you start pointing out the “wires” in the Apollo mission footage.

• Understand that this is not proof. This is manipulated, cherry-picked, circumstantial evidence that has been twisted by fucktards in order to make a buck off your gullible ass. None of these people are trained in image analysis or have earned any sort of credentials that will give any sort of authoritative voice. They are finding footage that looks odd and unintuitive and begging the question as to why there would be any other explanation other than to believe in their dumb-ass theory.

• Seek professional help. Maybe they can set you straight or put you on some good medication.

But most of all,

• Grow the fuck up. You’re 30 years old. Read a book for chrissake. Learn some things about the nature of this world, or of people. Believe it or not, real life is nothing like the movies or television. The real truth is far more interesting than these fictional accounts of real events will ever be. Now more than ever, there are tools at our disposal that allow us to learn and communicate on a global basis. But you’d rather just believe in your simplistic, retarded view of things and try and force feed this bullshit on the rest of us. Get a life, or go fuck yourself.

People like you used to make me sad. Now I’m just fucking angry. Too long has this BS gone on, and now it’s infecting people that should fucking know better. You know? People with a 2nd grade education or better. Next time, no more nerf-tosses. I’m going to start throwing some medicine balls of reality and you won’t stand a chance. Sometimes, these douches need to be laughed at – to their face.

Best regards and warm wishes,
cmyk

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Oh no! They’ve gotten to you too!

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There’s no where to hide anymore! They’re… everywhere.

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Did you watch Zeitgeist?

Marc

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My boss is like this. Just this morning ask me if I heard that “it was reported” that Bush was going to attack Iran right before the election to help John McCain win.

I told him no, acted surprised, and asked where he heard that. He named some stupid fucking website he reads.

He is otherwise a smart guy, but if this were true and there was good evidence of it, then why wouldn’t it be the lead news story on all of the news channels and on the internet? Why would you have to go to some obscure website to find it?

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:smack: Because the MSM are all in on the conspiracy. The liberal MSM included! :smack: :smack:

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Didn’t even know about it, but I think I’ll check it out. Thanks.

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I… don’t think you’ll enjoy it.

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Preach it, cmyk!

Heh-heh-heh . . . Eeeeexcellent!

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I did. Catcher in the Rye. I’m telling you man, it’s all in there.

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You might want to specify a book, lest they read David Icke or some other such drivel.

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We’ve got 'em here, too. If it isn’t 20MB PowerPoint presentations on September 11th conspiracies filling one’s mailbox, it’s Hillary’s plan to declare martial law, hand over US sovereignty to the United Nations, and use the Constitution for rolling papers, or how the left-wing liberals are making up the whole oil crisis and anthropological global climate change as a way of undermining democracy and instituting a long-held hypogean desire to implement international Marxism. Never mind a complete lack of supporting evidence; it’s like Bill O’Reilly crossed with Robert Anton Wilson and Art Bell. (What ever happened to Bell, anyway? Did the Men in Black/aliens/underground Soviet Army/whoever finally get him? He was like a superhero, always disappearing in some mysterious circumstance only to show up a few issues later. But I digress.)

cmyk, you should strap your guest down and force-read him Foucault’s Pendulum until he agrees to mend his ways or blood starts pouring out of his ears. That’ll learn him.

Stranger

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Ooohhh, I thought it was anti-conspiracy stuff. I might watch it anyway, so my blood can really boil.

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My son asked me to watch it, so I did. I found it interesting. Who can really say who is right and who is wrong? I enjoy different ideas, there is nothing wrong with checking out stuff.

Here is the link for the movie for anyone interested. Zeitgeist Movie

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There aren’t many events any more where some people won’t automatically think ‘Conspiracy!’

In another thread, ppl were talking about what others like about the US and the idea was posted that we’re somewhat transparent, that we put our scandals on the front page rather than cover them up. To some degree that’s true.

But look at all the coverups that go on anyway. Many wrestled with the JFK assassination, for instance, for decades. I’ve heard many bashing the Oliver Stone film and I don’t consider myself an expert, so I’m not here to debate it…but for me, the film established that a lot of people didn’t think the government had given enough good, accurate, trustworthy information. So much for “transparency.”

As a result of past issues like that, I think Americans have a basic distrust of the government and that isn’t a bad thing.

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Distrust is okay, and everyone should have a well crafted sense of cynicism as our government has certainly deserved it. But, most of these CTs are so egregious, that anyone with their head screwed on even half-way, will recognize a bogus representation of the facts.

It only really bothers me when such people who subscribe to those theories have to willfully ignore even basic common sense in order to buy into the theory. My jaw has become unhinged.

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Dude, that EXACTLY what they want you to think! Open your eyes man!

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Sigh… that just proves that some people won’t believe the government no matter what they say. The evidence that actually exists (and not the made up and twisted BS “theorists” have self quoted and referenced over the years) points to the same thing that the findings of the Commsion found… a lone nut killed the president. As for Stone’s movie… the less said the better.

Look at an actual government cover ups to see the real ability of the big bad government to pull the wool over the eyes of the people. Watergate for example involved a large scale conspiracy from the top down, look how that ended.

Hell, one president couldn’t get away with covering up a blowjob in the oval office.

Now how do you think something as massive as 9/11 or a presidential assination could manage to stay covered up this long?

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But, remember, the conspiracies that have come to light are, by definition, the only ones we know about! “Tip of the iceberg,” and all that.

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People with brains, basic logic and reasoning skills, facts, evidence, basic understanding of how the world works. You know, it’s really not that hard to see that movie for the 100% blue ribbon bullshit that it is. And I’m an atheist with a general distrust of authority.