Or maybe they hope that their present company isn’t so damned shallow or petty as to judge someone purely on the basis of what they like to wear?
EXACTLY!
My boyfriend showers and combs his hair. But believe it or not, his wardrobe is very limited to hand-me-downs and such. So out come the pajamas!
The guys in skirts thing really irritated me. It wasn’t because they were making fun of him. It was because they automatically assumed he was gay.
…and for the record. I wear jeans and a tshirt almost every day. I do wear skirts, but they’re the kind ** opalcat ** was talking about. My skirts go past my calves and flow like the dickens.
I guess I just get frustrated because people put too much emphasis on clothing. There are more important things in the world, in my opinion. While I’m busy trying to spread happiness in the world, I’m stopped in my tracks by people telling me I should dress a certain way while doing it.
/X(…)/X\
No matter who says what, a person appearing in public while wearing pajamas is not dressed for the occasion. Unless I am misunderstanding the meaning of “public.” A trip to the mailbox might be okay, but a trip to the post office would not.
Please ignore my previous post. I just realized that that one message places me squarely in the camp of those that I have resisted my entire life. For a moment, I became my father and it was a horribly frightening moment. It will not happen again.
Wear what pleases you and NEVER conform.
I agree with Eve on this one. Dress as you like, it only makes me look better when you run around in the middle of the day in your jammies. Ladies, come off it. You know that a guy is gonna check out the lady in the skirt every time, it just looks nice, and men like to see a little leg now and then and a woman that looks like a woman. It’s what separates the men from the ladies. If you choose to look like a man, then don’t expect a lot of male attention. And for the ladies that already have an SO, don’t be shocked or surprised if you fail to take care of yourself, if that SO doesn’t find himself another little lady to play with. Use all the excuses you want, it will happen.
And I prefer a man that dresses like a man. Skirts are fine on men, if they are with someone else.
You will not catch me out in public with jammies, unkempt hair, or no make-up unless it’s a total emergency. Late night trips to the convenience store does not give you the right to frighten the clerks and other customers.
Whimper, scream, cry, use your list of excuses that continues to grow on and on. You have years and years of society and culture to fight, people will still laugh and you haven’t won the battle or the war.
Where might I find these detachable woman-parts, that I might dress “not like a woman”? Even when I wear the same shirt as the Raven, my shirt has breasts poking out the front, and his doesn’t. Even when I wear his pants and my boxers, I still have the same equipment I always do, and it’s perfectly obvious that I’m female. Perhaps there’s some trick to this where I can dump my cleavage in the top dresser drawer and avail myself of Lee Press-On 'Nads to make these men’s pants fit right?
Oh yeah, I’ll check out the guy in the skirt every time. Mostly because…friend of mine bought his first skirt about a year ago. He sat down on the couch, cross legged, reached down and adjusted the equipment and kinda tucked the skirt fabric where it was most comfortable, and said “My, these things are comfy, I see where you chicks must love them!”…at which I pointed out that he’d just done all the things you’re not supposed to do in a skirt…including not wearing underwear. Not that I was complaining, it was a good view.
Corr
My joke post above notwithstanding, this is horrifying. Horrifying. Wh- I mean… Christ almighty, are you admonishing women to dress girly or they won’t get a man?
Sure, I’m all for dressing well. I take every opportunity I can to throw on my suit, 'cause it’s a nice suit (and I had to pay for all that nice, which is why I only have the one), and it makes me look smooth as hell. And when I look smooth as hell, I feel smooth as hell. I think we can all understand this. Shaman dresses like the bison, he is the bison. Fundamental stuff.
But to advocate dressing a certain way not out of aspiration, or the pleasure it brings you, but fear? Fear of not being able to land, or keep, a man? That’s just fucking perverse.
Such a hope would, I think, be a clear sign of mental illness, as all rational people know that our appearance affects the way others perceive us. Incidentally, “mentally ill” would be my first guess if I saw someone parading around in public in their pajamas. I do not spend much time thinking about how other people dress, but I expect productive members of society to be dressed. If it’s a choice between hand-me-downs and sleepwear then by all means, bring on the hand-me-downs!
Oh and ultress, not every woman is interested in dressing to attact the male gaze. I sure as hell am not. I’ve spent a goodly portion of my life since puberty dressed more or less like a bag lady in order to discourage unwanted sexual advances from men. People should dress in whatever manner is most likely to bring them the sort of reaction they want. Of course, this also means they should not complain when they get the sort of reaction that is to be expected based upon the way they are dressed.
Change “parading around in public” to “running to the corner store at 2am for cough syrup” and tell me if you still think “mental illness”
Change “parading around in public” to “hanging out in their own yard”
Change “parading around in public” to “driving the kid to school, never getting out of the car”
[oh, and my husband would never leave me because I spent too much time in my jammies.]
Well Lux Fiat, you can take it any way you want to, twist it, turn it, throw it upside down. I don’t think ‘fear’ was mentioned in my post. I’ve not had fear of finding or holding a man so to speak if that’s my desire, but I don’t need a man to make my life complete so no, ‘fear’ is not a factor. It’s called self-respect and presenting yourself to others in the best way. And I’m very sure there are plenty of men that enjoy seeing women in tight jeans. The whole point of the OP, excuse me if I misread this, are people that dress this way every day of their lives, not just occasionally. So tell me please, what exactly is ‘girly’ dressing? isn’t this an individual thing? I’ve seen women that aren’t comfortable in anything but skirts and dresses, but they don’t consider themselves ‘girly’, it’s just the way they like to dress. And if you don’t care and aren’t out there to attract a mate, then don’t worry about it, dress in jammies 24 hours a day or a bag lady if you like. Just don’t complain when you spend most of your time alone or with your girlfriends, but you can wear your jammies. And keep your head stuck in the sand. Not my doing, it’s just the way things are and always have been, whether you like to admit it or not.
Try “alone or with your friends”
Why would one’s friends neccessarily be girls? I’ve always had far more male friends than female, and none of them seemed to mind when I dressed grungy, had hair full of sawdust, had grease streaking my nose, calluses that could scratch diamond, paint or plaster wiped on my shirt or pants, etc. They were my friends anyway.
But then, I’m married and my guy friends weren’t looking to ‘pick me up’ either.
Yup, that’s the difference. They don’t look at you as a prospect nor really probably as a female, only a friend. So they don’t really care what you look like, and in the privacy of your home, who is there to care. The op was stating ‘public view’ not your home. And if you didn’t care what you look like, Opal, you wouldn’t be having surgery would you? Nor would you post pics of you before and after, especially in what most definitely is not jammies. So your case is a little flimsy to say the least. But then the thread isn’t about you, since you are above and beyond the rest and always have been.
Don’t complain when I spend most of my time alone or with girlfriends? HA! Thats the way I like it. Except I don’t have a lot of girlfriends. I have mostly guy friends. Alot of them have also been my boyfriend @ one time or another. I don’t think the way I dress has ever been an issue with a “mate”. I like for people to like me for my BRAIN and PERSONALITY, not for my ability to coordinate clothing. So I dress like a guy? So I wear guys shoes? I’ve been told alot of times I’m the coolest chick in the world. Why? Because I don’t talk about myself constantly, or how I’m going to change the world with my new high heels.
but skirts are soo girly!
Real fashionable lads wear “wraps”. Or at least a few of the braver ones did back in '92 or so.
(Thank goodness, no photos taken. . . )
WTF? What is your problem? If you have a problem with me, take it to the pit.
And when did I say I didn’t care what I looked like? I said I didn’t care of other people didn’t like my clothes. And being overweight is a lot more than the way you look. And I wasn’t talking about the privacy of my own home, I was talking about running to the store in the middle of the night or walking the kid to the bus stop or driving somewhere without getting out of the car.
I was just trying to make the point that people were over-generalizing, and I was giving examples.
—> I mean to its own pit thread, rather than hijacking this one. Sorry for not being clear.
Bullshit. Hoping that people aren’t so fucking shallow that they’ll reach an adverse judgement of you for wearing pyjamas or a skirt is hardly a sign of mental illness.
So, the district attorney shows up in court to deliver her opening statements in an important case in her pajamas. I would think, “That poor woman. I wonder what happened? She must be starting to crack.” I take it you would think, “That woman must possess an admirable belief that other people are not shallow and will not judge her in any way based upon the way she is dressed.” I wonder which of us would be more likely to be correct?
Nice fucking strawman. From going shopping at night in pajamas to opening an argument in court without so much as a fucking pause for thought.
And personally, no, I wouldn’t think she was starting to crack. I might wait a couple of minutes to see what she had to say for herself before making damning judgements about her mental condition. Or are you actually saying that you’d judge her arguments based on what she was wearing?
If so, where do you draw the line? If your hypothetical attorney turns up suited, but with bad matching shoes - do you still judge her mental competence on this?
Sitting 5 offices down the hall from me is one of the best programmers I ever hired. He turned up at his interview wearing sandals, shorts and a bad hat (a fez, if I recall correctly) - in the middle of winter in scotland. Rather than dismiss him outright I gave him a hard interview, quizzed him on coding techniques, and went through his employment history. Fucking glad I hired the guy, and god only knows how much he’s made/saved me in times of development times and innovative ideas. You’ll excuse me if I think your “inappropriate clothes are a sign of madness” routine is complete bullshit.