Let’s not make this into a debate on the merits of spanking. What happened in that videos was a million miles from spanking. And her defense of it is inconceivable.
I’m not talking about that video- there is a thread for it.
I’m replying to the idea that Lynn put forth that if you DO NOT smack your kids they will be out of control brats.
That’s patently false bullshit and insulting.
Some people incorporate spanking and it works ok for them. I think it’s wrong, but whatever. But to suggest you MUST hit your kids to be good parents is horrible horrible horrible.
Ah, but ‘spanking’ is what abusers rationalize that they are doing.
Did children from the bygone, often romanticized era of what is now classified as abuse behave any better because they got “taken to the woodshed”, had to “pick their switch” or were beaten with a belt? Honest question.
Seriously. I remember once coming home with a ticket for seatbelt violation (first offense, so he lowered the speeding ticket), and in the process, the cop had told me that my insurance was expired. So, terrified, I told my parents. Who reacted calmly and laughed.
Three hours later, after I’d forgotten all about it, my dad went to the car. He found, underneath the insurance tag I’d shown the guy, the current tag. Did my dad come up and tell me, hey, dummy, you missed this? No, he went straight into a major meltdown, screaming and yelling and shouting, while my mother joined in. The fight went on for two hours before they would leave me alone. I ended up sleeping in the car that night.
Many of Lynn’s posts have weirdly fascinated me over the years. She has spared us no details of her health problems and bowel movements, for example. Strangest of all is how she rationalizes the behavior that has, at the very least, exacerbated her conditions. Her doctor told her that she could eat lots of chocolate. It’s ok to cook with left over bacon grease because she somehow makes up for it in other ways. It’s also ok to eat lots of bacon that made the grease in the first place.
Beating the crap out of a child is fine but woe be to anyone who puts a little pepper in her food. What happens to her poops after that happens is very well documented in terms of frequency and consistency of said poops. If we don’t like it, we don’t have to read her posts. Right? Wrong. You see she’s not an Admin but she is. She doesn’t have the title but she still has the rights so she can use them when she wants to do so and she can’t be put on Ignore and it allows the rest of the Staff to give her special protection if they want.
She lives in her own special little world.
You are basically saying that corporal punishment is necessary for SOME kids but on the other hand ALL the kids that didn’t get it turned out bad.
We can’t put Lynn on ignore? I never wanted to before, but after hearing that little tidbit…
Mmm, you know, these threads are bringing back some not-so-wonderful memories. My parents once totally lost their shit when my Aunt was… I shit you not… four minutes late dropping me off after a weekend visit. Not that we had anywhere to go when I got home. Just that my Aunt was showing ‘‘blatant disrespect’’ for their rules and was a horrible influence on me and when they were done tearing her a new asshole they tore me one. I thank the universe every day I’m out of that hell-hole.
I know. I remember once I was putting away clothes and I accidentally mixed up my mother’s and my aunt’s underwear (she was staying over). Plain, white, cotton underwear.
Oh my god, my mom flipped out and screamed at me for three hours saying I didn’t love her and then gave me the silent treatment for four days straight. That one was so bad that my normally chickenshit dad actually intervened “Take it easy, honey…” that stopped the screaming but precipitated the silent treatment.
for us. And 
for us, because we’re out.
Lynn is apparently also an expert in the study of quantum-level changes in computer storage.
In this thread the other day, she suggested that John D. Kubiatowicz was either “incredibly misinformed” or even “just plain stupid” for an argument he made about the changes in weight resulting from filling an e-book reader with electronic books.
This “incredibly misinformed” or “just plain stupid” guy is a Professor in the Department of Electrical Engineering and Computer Sciences at UC Berkeley, and received a double BA (Electrical Engineering and Physics), an MS, and a PhD from MIT. He has dozens of publications and reports to his name, he received recognition from Scientific American in 2002 for his design of a distributed data storage system, and is the main faculty researcher on three different projects: The Tessellation Operating System, The Oceanstore Global File System, and The Quantum Architecture Research Center.
I’m not saying he can’t be wrong, Lynn, but for now, and in the absence of further explanation from you, i think i’ll take his word over yours about issues related to quantum changes in flash memory.
The guy does have a very 1996-style homepage, though. 
Same here. I was thinking about that unpredictability and how, whenever I came home from anywhere, I would yell, “Hi!” as soon as I came in through the door, because the tone of my mother’s voice—or whether she answered at all—would tell me what kind of a night I was in for. Believe me, some of the worst nights were the ones where she wouldn’t answer because she was too mad to speak. And whoever knew why?
But, yeah, I can see how that kind of treatment was *necessary *to make me the upstanding person I am today. :rolleyes:
This is true, but it is also true that in every aspect of life, there are assholes who use the statement “reasonable use of X is a useful tool in accomplishing Y” to justify their unreasonable use of X to accomplish their true goal of Z, under the guise of accomplishing Y. Pointing to abusers as an argument against spanking is like pointing to drunk drivers as an argument against driving.
Lynn, on the other hand, seems to be doing the opposite. Justifying abuse by pointing to reasonable spanking.
I meant to imply that though the kids I ran into without physical discipline were wild and uncontrollable, I can’t say that everyone needs this to turn out alright. Likely, some people didn’t need this form of punishment, like some of the people who have posted. It seems like those who I consider to be more mature, successful individuals had pretty much the same upbringing as myself. Surely, in this world, the case does not always turn out the same.
It’s hard to know what to do when you’re a parent, hard to trust books and theories when they vary so widely. I think most of the time, parents act in the same way they were brought up or sadly, follow the attitudes of the people in their community (I’ve seen this especially in small villages).
There’s a lot of fear today that hitting your child or spanking them will turn them into insecure children. I don’t agree with this. There’s a lot of cases where the abused child becomes the abuser later on. My best friend was abused and it’s definitely left him with some emotional scars, and he has trouble letting his problems out in other ways because it’s how he was raised to deal with frustration and disappointment. Abusers can die in a firey pit of hell, but let’s not forget what made them that in the first place.
My dad has a short temper like that. While he never beat us, occasionally we’d do something completely innocent to set him off on a yelling spree. It is really difficult to judge a person like that, as you could think everything’s fine but something suddenly rankles that person and he goes to Defcon 5 (or 1, whichever is the worst one)
On the bright side, it made you more empathetic Sounds like my mother when she was going through menopause!
I’m sorry but no kid “needs” to be hit. There are many many options as patent and most take time to work. Doesn’t mean you’re some evil parent if you do, or doom your child to a life of a victim but let’s not pretend that it’s some superior form of parenting.
But I can state with certainty that no child must be hit to turn out ok.
There is something creepy about a grown man spanking an adolescent girl. This is way beyond a simple spanking, obviously, but who does that in the first place?
Lynn Bodoni said that this was a last resort punishment, but I don’t know where she got that idea from. She made a lot of odd assumptions.
I can almost see it as misplaced anger from other things going wrong in the guys life. He uses the punishment/disciplining of his daugther as an excuse to release his frustrations of things he’s angry about but can’t do anything about.
Plenty of people out there who are pissed at their bosses and would like to strangle them but opt to bury it inside and wait to relaese it on someone else when they get home.
Let me pipe in about emotionally abusive and unstable parents to say you can never tell what will set them off. I had my mother wake me up at 4am on a school night in 6th grade to clean my room.
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She hadn’t told me to clean my room.
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She usually didn’t CARE if my room was all that tidy or not. There was absolutely no way to predict what would set her off, I assume in retrospect nowadays that she just was looking for something to raise hell about and could only find my room to stir shit up with me over. Abusers will always find a way, that is why it doesn’t MATTER what it was that set them off.
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She had no reason to ruin my entire schoolday, she could’ve left a note saying “Make sure room clean before I get home” and it would’ve been done.
But that wouldn’t have been abusive and destructive enough for her specific breed of batshit crazy.