snort That’s a good one. Having worked in a law firm, I know a couple of guys who fit this profile.
How many lawyers does it take to roof a shed?
Depends on how thinly you slice them.
Hey, that lawyer who was so offended pretty much had to ring 'em up on a criminal charge. I mean, he must have known there was no way he’d get a defamation of character lawsuit to stick.
From the link in the OP:
Color me skeptical that “all” they did was tell a couple of lawyer jokes.
How can you tell the difference between a dead skunk and a dead attorney on the road?
The vultures aren’t gagging over the skunk.
How can you tell the difference between a dead snake and a dead attorney on the road?
No brake skid marks in front of the lawyer.
Hm. I don’t get it. Could you (or someone else) explain? 
They were afraid he’d wake up and think he’d gone where lawyers go when they die.
(It took me a couple of reads, too.)
A woman is walking along the beach and sees something shiny just barely sticking out of the sand. She digs it out and finds it’s a magic lamp. When she rubs it a genie leaps out.
“Thank you, thank you, for releasing me from my prison! I will give you three wishes, anything you want!”
“What’s the catch?” the woman asks.
“Well, I’m a lawyer genie, so anything you wish for every lawyer in the world gets twice.”
“Okay, that’s fair. First off, I want ten million dollars.”
“Done! But every lawyer in the world just got twenty million.”
“Next, I want a fancy mansion to live in.”
“Done! But every lawyer in the world now has two mansions, one for summer, one for winter. Your last wish?”
In a thoughtful tone the woman said, “You know, I’ve always wanted to donate a kidney.”
Aaaahhhhh…OK. Makes perfect sense now. Thanks.
This morning, it was so cold…
(HOW COLD WAS IT?)
It was so cold, I saw a lawyer with his hands in his own pockets!IIRC my favorite ending is the one said by Dave Allen:
In a thoughtful tone the woman said: “I want my sexual drive to be reduced by 50%!!”
Oooh, I like that ending too!
How was copper wire invented?
Two lawyers fighting over a penny.
The punchline I heard was “I want to be half-dead.”
A guy calls his lawyer’s office and says “I’m Mr. Jones. I’d like to speak to my lawyer.”
Secretary says “I’m sorry. Your lawyer died yesterday.”
Guy calls back in a couple of hours “I’m Mr. Jones. I’d like to speak to my lawyer.”
Secretary says “I told you before. Your lawyer died yesterday.”
Guy calls back. “I’m Mr. Jones. I’d like to speak to my lawyer.”
Secretary says “I’ve already told you twice that your. lawyer. died. yesterday. Why do you keep calling me.”
“Because I love the sound of it.”
I always heard it as “… now I wish half of all my posessions were taken away from me.”
Feh. If those two are still throwing that lawyer joke around, they should have been charged with reckless endangerment of the elderly.
…Pit bulls wear lipstick?
I realize this turned into a joke thread, but I just had to comment. I live 15 minutes from Hempstead and work about a mile from the courthouse mentioned in the article. Trust me when I say there are far worse things going on in Hempstead and neighboring towns than two guys cracking bad jokes. I really hope this case gets thrown right out.
Carry on!
Believe it or not, these guys do, indeed, spend LOTS of time standing around outside courthouses in Nassau and Suffolk counties screaming lawyer jokes through bullhorns. I’ve seen them many times myself. As far as I can tell, that’s about 90% of what their “lawyer reform” group does. The system needs a lot of work, but what they’re doing sure isn’t helping any.
I’m guessing that the lawyer in question and the court officers in question had seen these guys in action innumerable times, and just figured this was the one chance they might have to shut them up for a change, since the guys were not actually staging a protest in their “official” capacity at the time but were there as litigants.
Do I think this is a good enough excuse for arresting the idiots? Absolutely not. But I can attest to the fact that being polite to jerks in and around the courthouse all day long can be rather a strain. (BTW – there is no need to convince me that a lot of lawyers are in the spectrum from just plain stupid all the way to vicious and corrupt. I see them every day. However, I can say without reservation that some of the most kind, intelligent and caring people I have met are judges and lawyers, too.)
I’ve heard the same joke only a man found the Djinn. He wished for *one * testicle to disppear.
