Dilemma with the choir director: What can she do to me?

In My Humble Opinion
1

Here’s the story: I am required by my major to participate in a large ensemble on my major instrument every semester. Since my instrument is voice, this means I’m in choir. Our festival choir is made up of a lot of students of all sorts of majors, plus several faculty members and quite a few people from the community who just want to sing. There’s about 150 people total.
Our holiday concert is the first weekend in December, Friday and Saturday nights. A few weeks ago the director informed us that some local television station will be professionally videotaping Friday’s concert for later showing on (I think) public television… whoo. This is a big thing for her, she’s apparently been trying to get someone to do this for a while now. So at this week’s rehearsals (2 weeks before the show, mind you) she lays out some rules she has for concert appearance, since the concert is to be taped… She says no facial piercings, no nose/eyebrow/lip piercing, etc. I don’t have any, but still, that irritates me no end because I don’t think she has any right to do something like that, it’s jewelry like anything else. And then she says no “wildly colored hair.”

At the moment, my whole head of shoulder-length hair is a brilliant (and highly flattering) shade of shimmery dark blue. It’s only been this way for less than a week. There is also another girl in the choir who has bright green hair, hers has been like that for a month.
I am NOT changing my hair color. One, it would be expensive and time-consuming, and would most certainly cause untold damage to my already dye-fried locks. More importantly, though, it is my damn head, thank you very much. I understand she wants us to look professional, and I will dress appropriately for sure, but just because I have blue hair does not make me unprofessional. She wants us all to conform and look like the Cute Little Small Town White Kid College Choir ™. So I’m saying now that I will not change my hair for her.

But what I want to know is, what can she do about it? She didn’t say anything about potential consequences if we don’t fall into line with her little exercise in dictatorship. The only thing I can think of that she might do would be to not let me sing Friday night, which has got to be illegal or something. Discrimination on the basis of appearance? If, hypothetically, she refused to let me sing for that performance, I could fight that, right? I’m fully prepared to go to the department head or the college president or… somebody, whoever I would need to. She can’t very well dock my grade, can she? Nowhere in the syllabus and class requirements does it say “normal-colored hair”. Seems to me like she must be bluffing and she just expects everyone to go along with her. I really don’t see what she can do about it, but I wanted to see what everyone else thought.

So, can she do anything?

2

Odd…my choir director in high school was also a fascist dictator…must have something to do frustrated performers being forced to teach.

At any rate, despite your right to have hair any damn color you want, I would suggest you wear some sort of knit hat. Not to appease Mrs. Saddam, but to be fair to your other choir members. It is their shining moment as well, and I think the whole idea of a choir is to bring a unified voice in song - otherwise it would be a really bad version of American Idol.
You wouldn’t want to be the only one with a red choir robe, or the only one with your face painted orange…so as a favor to your friends who want to shine just as much as you do - cut them all some slack. Do NOT dye your hair back, but certainly you can figure out a way to stuff those locks into something a little more subtle.
There are battles to be fought for independence and individuality, but I don’t think this one is really worth the effort.

3

I would say she could probably keep you from performing. I doubt she could affect your grade. I don’t believe there’s any reason she couldn’t exclude you. Hair dye is not a protected civil right. Just as she could exlude someone wearing “inappropriate” clothing or piercings, I see no reason why she shouldn’t exclude you for your hair color, if that’s her wish. However, she does have a boss. If you want to appeal her decision, you could. It doesn’t mean you’d win, though. They see you as representing the school. The image of a blue-haired girl may not be the image they want to project. If your school has a theatrical departent, you might see if they have a wig you could borrow.

StG

4

Hats are against the rules as well, even in rehearsals… plus I look awful in them. Plus I’m not the only one, there’s a girl with green hair a row back and two over from me. I don’t think I’m likely to outshine anyone… It’s not even an obnoxious bright blue. It’s pretty dark, so on first glance one might think it black. Everyone in the rest of the choir that I’ve talked to have supported me on this. I’m not trying to upstage the other 149 people in the choir, but I think I have the right to not be penalized for the color I choose to make my hair. My voice in song is unified. I blend, I know my music and sing it well. She can have no problems with my musical contribution to the choir.

But yeah, hats are out of the question.

5

Your friend with the green hair is in deep doo-doo.

NEVER wear green on TV.

6

I was thinking more in terms of a snood…a stretch knit thingie akin to a hairnet. Not a hat.
However, it seems you have already made up your mind, so I will quietly back off.
Ave maria.

7

StG, It just seemed to me that it would be some form of discrimination to exclude me because of my appearance. It is a volunteer choir, for the most part, though I have to be in it because of my major. It’s not indecent, and I honestly don’t think it’s inappropriate, it’s my freaking hair. It’s blue. For all she knows, I’m getting in the spirit of Hanukkah. (That brings up a whole other issue with this woman, but that would require a Pit thread.) To me it seems like it would be discrimination just the same as not letting someone participate because they have brown eyes or because they have a big zit on their forehead or because they’re Asian. My school makes this big deal about diversity and blah blah blah and now she wants us to conform and all look the same?

I should probably also mention that last fall I was in the color guard of the marching band and I had blue chunks in the front of my hair. The band director also mentioned a rule about no colored hair, but he never did anything about it, never spoke to me personally, and I didn’t get a bad grade for it… and our marching band aspires to the highest levels of respectability and professionalism. I’m thinking if he could have done something about it, he would have. This band director is the current department chair, so I’m not sure what effect it would have on my case if she did exclude me and I brought it to him.

As for a wig, the stage lights are sweltering enough as it is, no way am I putting on a big itchy fake head of hair. And DMark, I have never heard of this thing you mention… I really am not planning on covering up my hair, but I’m curious to see what you’re talking about.

8
9

BA in music performance here…
[ul][li]Your director can keep you from singing.[/li][li]This can affect your grade.[/li][li]You can appeal this ahead of time with the director’s higher-ups. You will be aided in this appeal by the fact that she waited until two weeks out to announce this, dark blue is not wildly-colored, and (I’m assuming) this is the only large group you can be in (as a tuba player, I had more options… band, symphony, brass choir, brass quintet).[/li][li]It should not come as a surprise to you at this late date that directors like a little uniformity. I notice on preview that you have already been Spoken To about colored hair. Rut-roh.[/li][li]Your director is doing this to make you conform. Why the hell else would she announce it at this late date?[/ul][/li]If all else fails (you have to sing to get a grade, you have to get a grade to satisfy the department, you can’t dye it, you look bad in hats which aren’t allowed anyway, and you can’t get a wig): shave those naughty blue tresses off.

10

AntaresJB (count me in as another Doper who thinks your name is cool) - All discrimination is not illegal. Not the fact that the golf club at which the Master’s is played still doesn’t admit women. There are certain types of discrimination that are precluded by law in certain circumstances, but certainly not all discrimination is outlaw. For example, I’m sure your choir has a right to discriminate against the tone-deaf. I’d bet that your chior director is within her rights. How far she’ll take is up to her. Does she want your voice badly enough to make an exception?

StG

11

Hmmm. Now I want to dye my hair deep blue. It sounds lovely.

That being said, I think Ethilrist is right on the nose.

You might look into one of those very temporary colors that would tone it down…if it’s nearly black already, it wouldn’t take much. Give your hairdresser a call and see if she can advise you.

Got a picture? I wanna see!

Best luck,
karol

12

I take it this choir is a volunteer organization?

I take it you are required to sing in A choir, but not specifically THIS choir?

Then you can’t really demand to be included in the choir, can you?

And if the choir performs in robes and you decided you didn’t want to wear a robe for the performance, would you expect the choir director to go along with that?

Whether you had to audition for the choir or not, it’s the choir’s business who it allows to perform.

13

I don’t know if you have a case. I suppose you might. But I have some other comments.

The same as being Asian or having brown eyes? Are you serious?

You said “It’s pretty dark, so on first glance one might think it black.” That doesn’t sound “wildly-colored” to me, but your choir director may differ.

But before that you said “brilliant (and highly flattering) shade of shimmery dark blue.”

So which is it - brilliant and shimmery or so dark it might look black? How could it be both at the same time? Would it be brilliant in direct sunlight or TV lights, and dark under other conditions?

14

what is green-haired girl doing?

and really, is it an issue of not wanting to change your hair color again, or of standing up for they way you think things should be?

if it’s just that you like your hair the way it is, do something about it just for that nite. spray it black or something. but if feel you shouldn’t even have to change…well, decide if a failing grade from not performing (the consequence here at my school) is worth it.

15

Here, here, and here are some really really awful pictures of the hair in question.

One: This IS the only large ensemble I can be in… there is Festival Chorus and there is Concert Choir. Concert choir is an audition-only ensemble, I have never auditioned because the workload and general atmosphere of the concert choir don’t appeal to me, and I doubt I would get in anyways. So I must be in Festies.

Two: Shave my head?? Ay chihuahua, no chance in hell of that happening! My hair is a very important part of me, I would look freaking awful with no hair. And how is a bald chick in the second row of sopranos any less conspicuous than a blue-haired chick?

Okay, so I can see how she might not let me sing, but only on Friday, since that’s when the taping is – for our concert earlier this semester, the girl with green hair was fine, I think she’s just doing this because of the taping. But she should let me sing Saturday. My dad’s coming then, and if I don’t sing, I know he’ll probably protest loudly and demand his money back… But I don’t see how it would be fair for her to lower my grade when it’s her decision not to let me sing. In the syllabus it says you lose points for missing a concert. I am going to show up to the concert, completely prepared to perform. In the syllabus it says that if you miss an excessive amount of rehearsals (more than 4 or 5, I think) then she’ll take measures to see if you’ve learned the music, and if not then you won’t perform. That is a reason I understand for not being allowed to sing. Same as if I showed up in an orange pumpkin suit when I’m supposed to wear something long and black. Clothing and learning your music are things that she can reasonably expect a choir member to do to pass it as a class. But I don’t think it’s reasonable for her to expect me to change my hair color for her on 2 weeks notice, just because she doesn’t approve of it. The attendance and clothing requirements are in the syllabus and we knew of them well in advance and they make sense. This was just sprung on us. This is my fifth semester in the choir, and this is the first time she has done anything like this. I have had blue and purple and orange and red and pink hair, and she has never had an issue with it. So the issue is both me not wanting to change my hair color, AND the fact that I think this is unreasonable and ridiculous. I can maybe understand her not allowing me to appear on stage (for the taping) but it would be thoroughly wrong to lower my grade when I have fulfilled all the written and established requirements of the course.

I think I’m going to make an attempt to speak to her superior about it on Monday, get his take on it. She hasn’t said anything so far to me about it, which I think she would do if she intended to penalize me for it. I would be pissed if she doesn’t let me sing Friday, and I would argue it, but I would be able to bear it, I guess. If she takes points away from me, though, that I will definitely protest vigorously.

I am trying very hard not to sound like a whiny teenager going “It’s not fair!”, and I don’t think it’s working very well… hehe. This is a serious issue with me, though, it just seems ridiculous and very very shallow of her, and I’m really sick of being judged by my choice of haircolors by the people in this bass-ackwards hidebound department.

16

Is this the hill you want to die on? Why is this such a dilemma? Just put on an inexpensive wig and tell her beforehand that is what you intend to do. It will resolve the problem and the incipient confrontation.

17

Maybe you should just ask her, and find out the consequences. Maybe you are worrying about nothing. To me, green is more wild than dark blue.

18

Why don’t you cover your hair with a scarf? I notice that at your website you have at least one picture with your hair covered by a scarf.

19

I just gotta wonder…what if your hair was naturally a bright red? I’ve seen redheads whose hair was more attention-getting than yours…would you have to dye it from the natural color?

20

(if I’m understanding this correctly,) Since this is your major, why not talk to your advisor and get their opinion and suggestion for options?

As a music minor, I had many a dress code I had to comform to, even if I hated em, because of the grades. My grade was more important.