I need less (hair) color in my life

After the worst retirement possible, in which I left the workforce on December 31, 2019 to go to all those conventions I never got a chance to go to and visit all those places I never got a chance to go to…well, y’all know what happened next (insert several thousand "FUCK!"s here when you have the time). Money is getting tight, Social Security doesn’t stretch as far as it used to, and I needed a job. I signed up with Express Pro, and after several ridiculous job offers involving degrees I don’t have, and job offers that involving warehouse work using equipment I have never used before and lifting 80 lbs. at a time(did I forget to mention that I am 64 years old and reasonably healthy…for a 68 year old?), the finally sent me out to try out for a job they described as “an easy cashier position”.
Yeah. Right.
My new job is at a large truck stop and involves operating a weigh station while operating the fuel station while operating the mini mart, and it also involves (and here we finally get to the reason for this thread) a supervisor that doesn’t allow “unnatural” hair color in her employees, male or female. Take a look at my avatar-My hair is now twice as long and in alternating hues of blue and green, and I need all that color stripped out by Sunday afternoon.
What products are there that might do the job?

Oh ghod, I’m going to look like an ugly albino, aren’t I? :grimacing:

A cashier position is only described like that by someone who has never actually been a cashier.

As to what you can do, here are my suggestions based on my limited personal knowledge (I’ve never had multi-hued hair).

  1. There are products to look for in the hair color aisle that will bleach the color out of your hair. I have had customers tell me that they use the product, then re-dye their hair a darker color. In your case, this would presumably be a darker “natural” hair color acceptable to your employer.
  2. You could bleach your hair and leave that way, but the bleach may not entirely remove the color (too much bleach will do bad things to your hair, perhaps leading to the next choice on the list)
  3. You could shave your head. A bit drastic, but some take that route.
  4. When this has come up in my place of employment, which until recently had the same rule (it was relaxed during the Great Resignation because they were desperate for hired help) some people solved the problem by wearing a head scarf that completely covered the offending color(s).

I once turned down a nice job because the supervisor frowned on anyone with facial hair.

I have never regretted that. Pick your battles.

I need to pay my bills, and job opportunities for someone my age are freakin’ scarce.

My buddy Paul took a post-retirement job doing some driving. He drives a hearse from a funeral home within walking distance to his home to a crematorium an hour away.

At the crematorium he parks at a loading dock, does some paperwork, then eats his bagged lunch and reads. When everything is complete in 4 hours or so, he drives the urn back to the funeral home. It’s eight hours pay with maybe 2 1/2 hours of “work”.

I told him that if he tires of doing this, I’ll take the job.

Maybe you can just dye it brown instead of stripping it. You could ask someone in a beauty supply store.

Or you could go full Goth and dye it black. It’d cover the current colors for sure. I think if I were in this position I’d either do that or just shave it all off and start over.

Wait a sec — is the supervisor’s requirement even legal to make?

I like it. Then go full Severus Snape for the outfit.

And/or what others have said about dyeing over it with a darker color.

I’m annoyed to hear that these kinds of jobs still have these requirements. I never got to experiment with fun hair colors when I was younger because they were never allowed at my waitressing jobs. While there’s no actual rule against it in my current job, I just don’t feel right showing up to court like that. But I do it with temporary colors on vacation, and I would totally go permanent mermaid hair if I were a cashier, and my boss weren’t a dick.

It turned out that the Splat! temporary hair color wasn’t as temporary as I thought it would be-It has lasted six months with little sign of fading.

FYI, I’ve been disappointed by how quickly Lime Crime washes out. It’s supposed to last a week but barely lasts through two shampoos. In case you have a long weekend coming up and you miss the fun colors.

This. Become a skinhead. Sounds like your supervisor might be the kind of person who would appreciate that.

ETA: Or. . . . wait for it . . . .
Become a Straight Dope moderator. I hear it pays well for nearly no work!

Ask your boss if they’d be OK with you tucking your hair up under a hat?

BS! I’d challenge it! Have you met the supervisor yet? If not walk in flying your freak flag. Id bet you could win em over with your stunning wit and personality to the point where they wouldn’t notice your head style.


This. You’d think they’d have some kind of “company logo” noggin cover anyway; even if you have to buy one, that should work.

And then go in and ask him why.


I say go full Yul Brynner! I’m sure it be an improvement. It worked for Yul.

I was thinking Lex Luthor.

Why wouldn’t it be legal? Can you elaborate on your feeling why it’s illegal?