(Dimly) remembering Akebono

The Hawaii-born sumo groundbreaker has died at age 54 of heart failure.

Having followed the sport avidly when he was active, I feel compelled to say something, but as is usually the case for athletes who have been out of the spotlight for a long time, I’m not sure how to respond. So I’ll just list everything that still sticks in my memory:

Perhaps the greatest proof of his astounding influence was that I personally witnessed no fewer than three people, including my own father, see E.Honda in Street Fighter II for the first time and immediately call him Akebono. Not Konishiki. Not Takamiyama. Not Chiyonofuji, Asahifuji, Onokuni, Akinoshima, Terao, Kushimaumi, or Hokutoumi. Akebono.

Being the first foreign-born competitor to make yokozuna was a landmark achievement, obviously, as was an all but unthinkable 11 yusho, but the thing I admire the most was that it finally ended all the tiresome whining about Konishiki being robbed. Simply put, Akebono showed us how it’s done, accomplishing nearly everything (back to back yushos, sustained excellence, clutch wins over top opposition, not being a jerk) Konishiki couldn’t. Not to take anything from the big guy’s accomplishments, but he isn’t a yokozuna any more than John Daly is a Ryder Cup captain.

That he hung on as long as he did is made more remarkable when you consider that both the Japanese press and a disturbingly large chunk of the fanbase was hellbent on crapping on him at every opportunity. (Read his autobiography; some truly shudder-worthy stories there.) It’s an open question of who even wanted him to be a yokozuna in the first place, which, yes, is a requirement.

Like many of the greats, he eventually developed a signature move, that one kimarite he did better than anyone else and became the thing to watch for. Wakanohana had a pretty kawazugake, Kirishima had a killer utchari, and Takanonami practically built his entire mystique around kimedashi. Akebono’s was tsukidashi. See, he knew that his long, gangly legs were a weakness and if his opponent got to the belt he would very likely lose, so his gameplan was don’t ever let anyone get to the belt. And when it worked, it was the Geese Howard express for his hapless opponent.

Sadly, his career would end in an all-too-familiar tragedy, not being able to parlay his athletic success into a prosperous future. He didn’t have the political clout to join the Sumo Association after retirement, which meant that he had to find a completely new direction. Challenging enough under normal circumstances; downright soul-chiling when you add a spouse’s debts (reportedly from bad investments) to the mix. Thereby driving home the lesson…again…that it isn’t just what you know, it’s who you know, but I am trying to show a modicum of respect for the man, so I’ll leave it at that.

Unfortunately, the only thing I know him for is his WWE run where he did a worked sumo match with Big Show, and the sight of Big Show in a man-thong haunts my nightmares to this day.

I’m sure his career included many less regrettable highlights.

“After his retirement, he became a member (or elder) of the Japan Sumo Association as a coach, or oyakata” - Akebono Tarō - Wikipedia

Akebono was awesome to watch, his long arms keeping opponents at bay before shoving them out of the dohyō, sometimes deep into the crowd. He was low-key in interviews, making a startling contrast with his competitive fearsomeness.

That said, he was not as dominant as his contemporary Takanohana, who won 11 out of 17 tournaments at one point and 22 overall. Even Musashimaru won more tournaments (12). Nor did Akebono ever go 15-0. He did get to do his ring entering ceremony at the Olympics…as a replacement for the injured Takanohana.

Akebono was unquestionably a historically important yokozuna and a remarkable specimen of humanity who seemed like a cool guy. He was not among the greatest of yokozunas. Still, his passing left me – and many others – quite sad.

Oh shoot, it really has been too long. I’m actually a bit curious as to how he ever got the required toshiyori kabu, which requires 1. the goodwill of the Sumo Association and 2. a freaking lot of money. I’d also like to know how he got the idea that starting a restaurant (which I never knew about before; it wasn’t in the biography) was a good idea, but I guess that’s also too minor a detail to keep track of. (Come to think of it, I never heard a single thing about Konishiki from the time he took the mantle of Sanoyama Oyakata to when he said the hell with it a very short time later.)

And of course he wasn’t as dominant as Takanohana…no one was! Takanohana was the Tom Brady of sumo. Heck, his own brother wasn’t in the same star system. I still think it’s pretty remarkable that Akebono accomplished as much as he did given everything he was up against, not the least of which was being in an incredibly alien land which he was never able to fully adjust to. Definitely deserved a better future than constantly scrabbling for cash, but that’s just how life is sometimes.

i can’t find a report, but there was a tournement ~1993 when brothers Waka and Taka were likely to face each other in the final. except there were back to back bouts against Akebono. this was huge as all oh japan were on the edge of their tatami’s anticipating the waka-taka brothers showdown for the championship.

i don’t remember the exact details but Chad kicked their asses fast, one after the other. akebono didnt want long bouts that would sap his strength. not sure which one, but he dropped one of the brothers hard on his face. said brother had to go through the match ceremonial ending dripping blood with half is face abraded and likely concussed. it was awesome to watch.

i met Chad around then drinking in a bar. nice enough to fellow american, but it wasn’t like we hung out or even had a beer together.

RIP chad George Ha’aheo Rowan