So…STAY OUT OF MPSIMS.
I also agree in principle, but dude, there’s a time and a place.
This wasn’t it.
The grief is real enough, even if it isn’t the precise grief that the parents of a born child feel.
I didn’t say it in the other thread because I didn’t want to hijack it anymore or draw anymore attention away from the OP. The more I’d have tried to explain myself, the more the thread would have become derailed. I really don’t want to dick with Saddad anymore or make him feel any worse. My objection was not that he should not feel bad (he should) but that I felt it was inappropriate to equate it to the tragedy of losing a child. I just shouldn’t have said anything at all.
Jeebus, he posted in Mundane Pointless Stuff I Must Share with a pretty clear thread title (although, as I said, I don’t call it a “baby”, myself, I don’t think the title was misleading). It’s exactly the kind of thing the forum was designed for - person needs to vent, but would like sympathy rather than debate. If he wanted debate, or to be verbally slapped around, he’d have put it in the Pit.
I’m actually impressed that a guest got it so perfectly right, myself.
Yeah, that would have gone well.
Eat shit.
The difference here is plan as day to anyone with a couple of neurons still firing. You don’t want to hear about someone’s loss, don’t click the thread. It was pretty obvious what the thread was from the very beginning, and from the mouseover text.
“Trolling for sympathy” how callous can you get (never mind, I see that question has already been answered)?
Someone here has suffered a real loss, one that many of us on this board understand only too well, and for some dipshit to stick his nose into the thread and tell someone that he feels deceived by the thread title is jerkitude of the highest order. Nearly half the people in this country (or at least those who respond to polls) seem to beleive that what was in his wife’s womb was a baby. The fact that some people disagree shouldn’t mean that they have to be assholes about it.
Dio got a warning last week, and I don’t know if this Moderator Admonishment counts as a warning or not, but I won’t be sad if strike three comes soon. Unless, of course, he makes a complete turnaround (not necessarily in his beleifs, but in how he presents himself).
Oh, and Dio, I’m glad you’ve seen the error of your ways - not your beliefs, I don’t think those are wrong, but your actions. Good on you for owning up to it.
I know I’ve put my foot well into my mouth on any number of occasions, and I hope I was a graceful about getting it back out again as you’ve shown yourself in this thread.
For one thing, it’s bad form to excuse your own bad behavior as “truthiness.” That’s a refuge for scoundrels.
For another thing, it’s bad form to minimize someone else’s suffering, especially to bolster your own ego. That’s just being a prick for the sake of it.
We have a long tradition here of commiseration threads. It’s generally considered good form to either sympathize of shut the fuck up. I suggest you shut the fuck up. You have no corner on the truth, all you have is an opinion, and a stupid one at that.
Hey, here’s an idea: Why don’t you “man up” and just admit that you were being a jerk? It’ll earn you a lot more points than the weasling you’re trying to do now.
Bullshit. I’ve actually lost a child, and I have no fucking problem with anybody who wants to equate losing a much-desired unborn child with my loss.
I didn’t read it, since I rarely check into that thread. I just gathered what was going on from this pit thread. I don’t have to read those threads, and choose not to, I just think that since we’re now “pitting” someone for expressing an opinion in such a thread, it would be good to keep in mind that these are the risks one runs when posting deeply personal information to strangers.
There ya go. Was that so hard?
That’s your opinion/belief. Not everyone shares that, and it certainly doesn’t sound as though SadDad feels that way.
This thread is moving pretty fast, so maybe y’all didn’t see it, but he has admitted he shouldn’t have posted what he did. Three times.
Oh, for Christ’s sake. Every day in MPSIMS there are dozens of threads about people dying, dead, sick, hurt, grieving, celebrating, whatever. Hell, we had three or four on Sampiro’s mother alone, and by all accounts she was an utter bitch on wheels. As far as I can tell, Diogenes doesn’t run around to each of them and insert his particular brand of “I approve/disapprove of this thread” shitting. No one held a gun to either his head or yours and forced you to read the thread. For damn sure no one forced Diogenes to hit the reply button… he made that choice all on his lonesome. If you don’t want to read about trite situations, don’t read about trite situations (and don’t start threads on them).
And Diogenes, your response is pathetic. I don’t know what you think gives you the right to even-for-a-milisecond consider this:
is a role that anyone has the right to play, but you are FUCKING WRONG.
No it probably wouldn’t have. Perhaps was a situation when it would have been best to say nothing, in any forum?
I once opened a thread in which a woman was, in the title, grieving the death of her child, only to dscover in the OP that she was mourning her cat. I posted to point out that, personally, I found the child=cat discription misleading and inappropriate, and I got ripped a new one for that as well. So I do sort of sympathize with you, even though I also agree you were out of line. MPSIMS is not really the place for “truth” or “perspective,” you know. We’ve got a bunch of other places for that.
Thank you for sharing, Skald. My sympathies for your loss.
Because this is a fucking message board. . .and when you put your opinion out there for the world to see because you need eTherapy, you need to fully expect that you’re going to hear an opinion you don’t like.
You don’t want to hear an opinion you don’t like? Pay a fucking shrink $100 an hour to listen to your shit.
The only thing that DtC did wrong was to backtrack the inch that he backtracked in this thread. He has every right to post what he did in that thread.
Agreed.
Funny you should mention this because it’s EXACTLY how I felt after clicking on the thread title. I was all set to offer sympathy to someone who had suffered the worst loss possible only to find out there never was a baby at all. I even considered drawing an analogy to the loss of a pet but there were enough pitchorks out for me already.
I post too impulsively sometimes and don’t always filter things appropriately (you should see some of the posts that I’ve deleted without submitting). I wasn’t wrong in WHAT I said but I was wrong in where and when I said it.
Do you have a “fucking problem” with me equating the loss of my horse who I really loved with your dead child?
How about my very special miniature tea rose plant that died? It was like a baby to me.
Eventually, it does become insulting huh? Just because you personally aren’t insulted with the fetus/child comparison doesn’t mean that what Diogenes said is automatically “Bullshit.”
Nice metaphor for what it means to attempt a rational dialogue with this lot.
I didn’t read that thread, nor did I say anything to the fellow who posted it. I have nothing but sympathy for him. I only posted HERE, in a different thread, that if one is emotionally vulnerable, it might not be a great idea to post personal information to a group of strangers.
I quoted Diogenes’ label describing threads where people seek sympathy as… well, as threads where people seek sympathy. That makes me callous? Obviously the term “trolling,” is a bit harsh, but my quoting it is pretty slender evidence for judgment, isn’t it?