I remember one day, my SO and I were relaxing in bed one weekend afternoon, enjoying the afterglow, we heard his dog beside the bed munching on something. Wonder what she’s eating? …
Oh. It was the used condom, fished dripping from the wastebasket. Nice.
My current dog is pretty good. He doesn’t drink out of the toilet, eat cat turds, rifle trash baskets for tampons (those are in the bathroom, and the bathroom is SCARY), or wash himself too noticeably. But he does enjoy rolling in dead and rotting animal carcasses. Once he found a dead sea lion on the beach. I’m telling you, it was bad.
Good thing you don’t have my cat Callie then! She’s 20 years old and has been puking and eating it for as long as I can remember. We don’t even really have to clean it up anymore, unless it’s on the carpet. I’ve even caught my other cat eating her vomit before, and vice-verca. Yes, cats can be just as sick as dogs. At least they don’t eat bloody tampons and pads! I really wouldn’t wanna se THAT vomit being recycled! shudder
I have 2 dogs and 7 cats. They do all of the disgusting things that have been mentioned. Additionally, since I moved to the country, they frequently bring dead (and sometimes not quite dead) animals into the house: squirrels, birds, snakes, small rodents, toads, etc.
I got a pair of long handled tongs specifically for carrying dead animals out of the house. An extra benefit of this is when raucous neighbor kids find the tongs and start playing with them. I let them poke each other for awhile and then inform them that I use the tongs for carrying dead animals.
Watcher of the Skies, I love your user name. Is it from the Keat’s poem?
Wow, you must be a member of my family! We, too have a Border Collie who likes Poopcicles. We call them the exact same thing, too. She even gets excited if we ask her if she’s going out to eat poopsicles again.
I wish I would have been home for this one… My brother told me last week that Maggie had come up from down back one night carrying what looked like a stick. When she dropped it at his feet so he could throw it, he saw that it was in fact an entire deer leg!
[off topic] Being a biology major, I was very curious about the nature of this deer leg and so he left it in the yard for when I’d be home from school in a few days. But alas, my dad took it and threw it in the woodburning stove, so I never got to see it. [/off topic]
Maggie is also very good at cleaning up after the cat for me. I hardly ever have to clean the litter box and only have to clean up partially digested cat food about half the time that it comes out of the cat.
Truth be told, the menstruation thread reminded me of the dog’s preference and in a way, inspired the OP. We had a cat for a time, and let me tell you that the array of small dead animals that the cat would proudly leave on the doorstep rivals any of these dog stories for gross-ness. Never mind the smell of cat spray, or the blood curdling sounds of cats in heat “crying” in the middle of the night.
I thought that the thread title, Disgusting Dog Habits, represented fair warning as to what was to follow.
I chose it because it has a number of connotations that I like: the classic Genesis song from Foxtrot; friendly alien movies like Close Encounters, general interest in looking at/photographing the beauty of sky (day/night/twilight etc.) to name three.
An ex girlfriend of mine had a smallish black lab mix who could (and would, pretty much daily) give himself a blow job.
I’m not talking about a few sloppy and wet sounding licks…I’m talking about working himself over to the the fullest extent.
He was fixed too.
I was already quite aware that I had a reverse-pavlovian response to the sounds of canine tongues before I met this particular pooch, but knowing that you have an irrational urge to crawl out of your skin in response to a sound doesn’t really make it any more bearable.
My family’s Australian Shepherd used to to give his Johnson a nice, long, leisurely tongue bath just outside my bedroom door every night when I was a kid. My bedroom door consisted of a quilt hanging from a couple of nails, so there was little I could do besides shoving cotton in my ears to gain any respite. A few years of that and I was pretty much ruined for anything (other than gagging) in response to any sound that even vaguely resembled that particular sound that is “dog tongue”.
My doom was further sealed a few years later when my older brother’s German Shepherd (Thor) was shot through the neck by a local sheep rancher (he had slipped his collar and was running sheep). My parents forked over some serious $$ to the Vet, who discovered that the bullet had missed everything important, but we’d have to feed him though an NG tube for a while. Thor was never quite able to drink water the same after that…I think his ability to swallow was diminished…and it took him a good 15 minutes to take a drink. Each of those 15 minute episodes within earshot of me were torturous due to my existing aversion to that particular sloppy sound. Each 15 minute episode also reaffirmed the fact that the sound drove me nuts.
My current girlfriend and I have 3 dogs and 4 cats between us. I truly do adore most animals, even dogs, despite this affliction. I have learned to cope with ear-plugs [i[and* a pillow over my head. (My girlfriend’s two dogs are Pekenese…who are prone to licking and come complete with a tongue that is 2 sizes too big for their mouths.)
to the sounds of canine tongues before I met this particular pooch, but knowing that you have an irrational urge to crawl out of your skin in response to a sound doesn’t really make it any more bearable.