Diversity in the workforce (too mild for the pit)

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
41

[quote=“Gary “Wombat” Robson, post:25, topic:531974”]

I’d probably bring something ethnic, but from an ethnicity wildly divergent from my own…Then, when asked to explain why it’s important to you, start crying and run from the room.
[/QUOTE]

If you’re Jewish bring in a large, vintage flag from Nazi Germany. Be sure everyone already knows that you are Jewish. Perhaps you could be wearing a yarmulke. If anyone complains or says they’re offended launch into a rant about how your grandfather fought the Nazis during WWII, how he got the flag of a Nazi he killed. Be as graphic as possible. Describe every gory detail.

42

Boy, that’s gonna be awkward when the “my grandparents were Nazis” guy gives his speech on the same day, dressed in an SS uniform.

43

I hate this bullshit. As someone pointed out above, it doesn’t matter what you bring (as long as it’s bland and inoffensive). You’re being tested to see if you’ll go along with the official ritual, that’s all. Nobody really wants to learn anything about you. Your employer isn’t really interested in diversity. They want all their employees to be exactly the same – uncomplaining wage-slaves who will willingly work their butts off while happily accepting cutbacks in wages and benefits, or even layoffs. The firm probably doesn’t care if some of their employees look a bit different, as long as they are in fact exactly the same.

Someone suggested bringing a picture of your family. That’s a good one. It is no doubt the officially-approved thing to bring. It can’t get you into any trouble. If you don’t have a family, cut a picture out of a magazine. It doesn’t matter.

We have these ridiculous rituals every now and then at my company. There’s lots of diversity “initiatives” and “seminars” and shit like that. There’s actually a full-time “diversity director” (although I forget the exact title and I don’t care enough to look it up). Still, there don’t appear to be any actual African-Americans (or members of minority groups in general, except for a couple of Asian women) in senior positions, or even on track to be in senior positions. Or evening being recruited.

44

That’s funny. My former employer used to have regular “diversity job fairs” to recruit high-level minority employees, including executives. (They never had general job fairs.)

45

Sounds like you made it through.

46

This is by far the favorite scenario I have read in this thread.

47

This is a slight hijack my bad.. but my daughters best friend in 5th grade is German..(german national) and she’s bringing in pictures from her grandfather when he was in WWII.. And the irony is her best friend is my little chocolate bunny..

I would bring in a watermelon and a bottle of thundebird wine.. just the look i would get from the more uncomfortable people in the room would be priceless..; >

48

If I were in that meeting, I’d want you to be my best friend. You’ve got my kind of sense of humor.

Also, I need more black friends.

49

I agree although I think I would have introduced it with “This is my rifle. This is my gun. One is for pleasure one is for fun.”

50

How are gun owners persecuted or harrassed, and what does it have to do with diversity?

In some places, you’re the oddball if you don’t own guns.

51

Ohhhh, I see, we’re only talking about the socially approved kinds of diversity. Got it.

52

This reminds me of the “diversity and heritage” crap we had to do in middle school. We had to make a presentation about our family’s ethnic heritage (some people brought food in). My father’s side is a mixture of Scotch-Irish and Irish. On mom’s side it’s German and Jewish (my grandmother had a few cousin pen-pals none of whom survived the war). I made the mistake of trying to do both sides of my family. To several of my classmates German=Nazi so got treated to comments like “Hey, Jew-bagel who don’t you kill yourself” or “Why did you ancestors kill themselves”. :mad: