No I am actually being serious here. And I’m not being “defensive”. I am simply telling you that even if you dislike your job, it is not appropriate to treat your coworkers with the contempt you described. I’ve been at jobs where I don’t particularly care for or have anything in common with my coworkers. I still extend to them basic courtesies - saying “good morning” in the elevator, etc. If they start getting into their freakin life story you can always excuse yourself to make a phone call or something.
If you really clash with the culture of the company, you should look for a new job (if it wasn’t a summer thing). There’s a Monster add where a human worker is constantly annoyed by his (literally) chimpanzee coworkers. If you are 100% professional and your coworkers are %90 buffoons and that’s accepted in your company, you aren’t going to get anything out of that job.
As for my Pitting thread, let me say it’s one thing to like Office Space or Dilbert and make fun of the idiosyncrasies of the modern corporate office. It’s quite another to actually disassemble your cubicle, smash the printer and introduce a Superman III virus to steal all the rounded cents from all the bank accounts.