I used too.
Looking at your name, I don’t think anyone is going to answer your question.
I have a whole room full of cash, all unmarked and in large denominations. My house is unlocked, I’m at work until at least 4:30, and my dog is a wussy.
I need street addresses if this internet thieving thing is going to work. I think I will have to do some more planning.
Valuable stuff? Are you kidding? I’m in college! Geez… what’s the world coming to these days…
Welcome to the boards, Thief - and nice entrance.
I’m an agoraphobe, and the idea of someone coming into my house and going through my things is really excruciating to me.
So how about if you give me YOUR street address, and let me know when you leave the doors open, and I’ll just bring my expensive stuff over to your place for you? Hey, don’t mention it.
Look for the house with the claymore mine mounted on the front door.
Rap sharply on mine for admittance.
Here’s a tip: If I’m home, wear kevlar.
(I like to practice my head shots.)
Is all new you is this language, yes?
Yep, I do. I have a nice car too and I always leave the keys in it.
Silver Fire
55 Any Street
Any Town, MN
55555
Feel free to come over and help yourself.
4401 Oneida Street. Make sure I’m not home. I’d likely get pretty pissy over my stuff being hoarked.
Ha!
I own a victorian fixer-upper. Damn, is it a money pit! It needs a lot of expensive renovation. Very, very expensive…
Nothing in the way of “portable valuables”, though. I have a hideous 1970’s couch that may have value to a kitsch collector, but that’s about it. Sorry.
Oh, and I have two little doggies: one weighs 150lbs, and the other weighs 125lbs. They might take exception to an unauthorized visitor.
I wouldn’t steal all your stuffs, but I do need some more ram. Seems my computer is really slow, it takes forever to load this website.
Well, I own a Picasso and a Rembrandt and a Elizabeth I bed and Henry VII silverware and a Ming vase and the Hope diamond and am engaged to marry Mel Gibson, no that’s not right he’s already married well I am engaged to that rich person, you know the cute one, tall, dark, handsome, you know which one I’m talking about the one with billions of $$$. I also own a yacht and an island.
:: fingers are crossed to make lying morally correct ::
I know people get ripped on all the time for grammar, but damn Hunter, that was funny!
okay, what I’d miss? Had to dry my eyes after what that hunter guy says about my languge. I got feedings too.
You get feedings? Well, it’s good that you’re eating right.
Ba da bum!
Thank you, thank you. I’ll be here all week, don’t forget to tip your waiter.
I’m glad you got feedings. You see, my fridge isn’t worth raiding right now…
However, I do have a can of of Spam that you can swipe, if you like. In fact, I insist that you take it.
More ram won’t help ewe. You have to get a modem instead of trying to connect with a couple of cans and a string.
Why yes, we have jewelry, clothes, cars, handwriting samples from dead sports legends, all kinds of fun stuff.
We also have the original, and still the greatest, weapon for home defense- the Louisville Slugger (a Big Bertha driver is also nice). Don’t have the second best model, the shotgun, yet, but just because we haven’t gotten around to it.
In addition, we have a very large dog (165 lbs), but unless you are allergic to drool, he won’t have much effect, unless he falls asleep in front of the door, in which case you’ll never get it open.
I keep a nugget of pure gold up my ass.
My question to you: Is it worth the effort for you to steal it?
(My, I’m in a pissy mood today…)