Silo, I don’t believe you actually posted this.
walks off, laughing
spoofe: you might try standing on your head…
No, Spoofe. You need to look at what Uncle Coldy and Uncle Seale have to say on the matter 
" It’s handy
on those chilly mornings."
No way, I ain’t in your bed! 
I almost never get “morning wood”, and to me that’s a very good thing. On those occassions when I’m cursed with the affliction, the simple act of peeing becomes part ballet and part acrobatics.
I notice I tend to get it more when my sleep has been interrupted- like the alarm clock goes off after 6.25 hrs in the sack. I’m usually not standin’ tall though when I sleep in till lunch.
It’s not just for breakfast anymore!
I remember reading a Stuff or Maxim article about morning wood. It has something to do with hormone production being cyclical, with a very high concentration of testosterone early in the morning; hence, morning wood.
Sure does put a damper on my day trying to half-crawl, half-bend my body, half-hunch myself to get to the bathroom early in the morning before anyone else does. Then I have to stand on my tiptoes and implode my bladder to get anywhere.
Damn hormones.
Don’t believe what you read in Stuff or Maxim. Erections are controlled by the parasympathetic nervous system, not by hormones. Morning wood is just an example of nocurnal erections which occur between three and five times a night in normal adult males.
neuroman: I’ve noticed the same thing. It may be do to the fact that nocturnal erections happen almost exclusively during REM sleep. REM is the deepest part of sleep and if you wake up on your own you are likely to wake up in a lighter part of your sleep cycle. When an alarm clock wakes you up it doesn’t care whether you are in REM sleep or not. Therefore you wake up in the condition that REM sleep left you in.
I read that the average man gets 40 erections per night. So, whats the big deal about one in the am?
Morning wood? Ghods, yes and while fun, it can be a nuisance. Especially when you need to piss. sigh
Get it almost every morning. Great for mornings when you spend the nigtht with a woman. The night sex is drunk-sloppy poke her forever but not get off until an hour later. Then in the morning. Its cocked and ready. Over in 10 minutes and back to sleep. Repeat each 1-1/2 hour till you get up.
I also get morning wood when I have to pee.
Make that “useful on chilly mornings.”
There aren’t any users here named useful, are there?
Or handful for that matter?
I have to second Dr. Lao on this.
At my age my hormones don’t surge through my body so much as they saunter, and I still experience this pleasurable phenomenon.
Unfortunately my wife is also not a morning person. [sub]sigh[/sub]
I am not implying anything!
Been discussed before:
http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?threadid=11160
Morning wood? Some days I wake up with Morning Granite. What self-respecting guy doesn’t wake up at full attention? OK, maybe Bob Dole. But whenever the topic has come up, I’ve never found any guy that doesn’t. Always seems to accompany the urge to piss, which is a challenge in itself. The need for contortions that would impress a yogi, unless you want to shoot yourself in the eye. At one point I seriously considered putting a urinal in the bathroom. Wouldn’t that be a big help? Unfortunately, Mrs. Wolf nixed the idea.
When one obtains morning solidification, the best way to urinate is to take a few steps back from the bowl and aim as best as you can. Only one problem: If you’re one of those people that has a bathtub right infront of your pisser, you might as well try the sink. Its the perfect height too.
Morning wood is when I hit my head on the nightstand.
Astro boy needs Anti viagra!
REM sleep is NOT the deepest part of sleep. Its the in between bit when you are dreaming, ie you are looking around in your dream.