Do you believe they’re worth the risk of getting sick for? Or do you avoid each other?
By the same token, when you’re sick, do you let your SO be affectionate even if he or she doesn’t mind the risk of getting sick themselves?
Never happen. I’m weird about germs anyway. No need to court disaster.
I tend to assume that I’m already so exposed, it’s pointless to try.
To the people who don’t let their SO show affection when you’re sick and they’re not, even when they are okay with the potential of getting sick themselves: why not?
Just curious. I can see that some may just want to be left alone, but aside from that, if your SO doesn’t care if he or she gets sick kissing and cuddling you when you’re sick, why not let them comfort you and allow them to continue expressing their love? Is it not endearing that they’re willing to take that risk to continue being affectionate with you?
My wife really likes to be taken care of when she’s sick, so I do. I want to be left alone when I’m sick, so she does.
When my wife and I were first dating I spent the day before thanksgiving holding her hair and rubbing her back while she threw up all day the next day I got as sick as I’ve ever been. After that no more affection for her when she’s sick.
Now we’ve got two kids so at least one of has to be functional at all times. I’ve slept on the couch the last two nights so I don’t breathe on her since I caught a stomach bug from my daughter. It normally works at least in so much as whoever gets sick first is mostly healthy before the other one succumbs. So far in the 8 days since my daughter got sick and 2 days since I went down my wife is ok.
The whole point of a relationship is to take care of each other, so that together you are better and stronger than either of you are alone. So if she needs a cuddle, I provide it. And if I need one, she provides it. If that means we swap cooties, so be it. But the angels seem to appreciate our effort, because we rarely catch anything from each other.
Really not worried about cross-contamination. The only issue is when we are sick, we’re not really energetic, so the kissing and cuddling is reduced due to lack of energy and general malaise.
I didn’t pick that option because I don’t push my partners away on principle when I’m sick or anything. But when I get sick I get cranky and withdrawn, I often feel ugly and disgusting about my body, and touch itself is often physically uncomfortable. So I do it a little bit.
When Mrs. Charming and Rested is sick, she appreciates snuggles. When I’m sick, the warmth of her snuggles doesn’t outweigh how bad I will feel it I get her sick. I’d rather reduce her risk. She can bring me soup and tea to comfort me. It works for us.
There’s a difference between attending to the needs of a sick spouse with due caution and hand-washing, and on the other hand posting a quarantine sign on the bedroom door and wearing a surgical mask, while calling “Bring out your dead!” at intervals.
Anyone who thinks it’s perfectly OK to canoodle with a coughing, dripping and spewing spouse has probably never gone through a siege of norovirus.
There’s an assumption here that “sick” means “contagious”. When Ms Napier had cancer last year, I definitely comforted her. When I had peritonitis a few years ago, she definitely comforted me.
We care about each other and don’t want to hurt each other, so we both expect the other to keep distance when we are contagious with something.
Yes, I voted “no, no”, but of course I care for my husband when he’s sick, and he cares for me. We just don’t breathe in each other’s faces or eat each other’s spit when we are sick.
Again, yes, of course.
No, and no. Might get a kiss on the cheek, or an affectionate touch, but no snuggling, and no serious smooching.
Of course there is. The OP says “Do you believe they’re worth the risk of getting sick for?” so obviously contagious is meant.
Neither of us kiss or cuddle when the other is sick.
I feel like for me it would depend on the illness.
Colds and moderate fevers (102 or less) make up the majority of “getting sick”. That’s what I mostly had in mind asking this question, and in the case, I’d be willing to just get sick with her to show her affection (as long as she wasn’t the type to want to be left alone or something). Make being sick a romantic experience lol, since it’s not serious.
Strep throat is debatable and 50/50; not serious, but I have an extreme dislike for it because I had it a lot growing up. Now if it was the flu or throwing up or sustained high fever (103+), probably try to take care of her the best I could, while doing the best to not get sick myself.
I think it also changes if a couple has children. What I’m seeing is the majority of couples are well-willing to kiss those sick lips while still childless. But with children, that kind of thing becomes less worth the cost of the difficulty of taking care of the children.
I never get sick anyway, so germ me, baby!
her immune system is all mucked up, if she’s sick I will try to make her feel better. If I’m sick (rare, but it does happen) I try to avoid her as much as possible.
We take care of each other but I would never let her kiss or cuddle me if I’m very obviously ill and contagious, and she wouldn’t either.
And I have never dated anyone that would.
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