I hope all of you got to work on time. Nevermind the three police vehicles (well, two and a black SUV with flashing lights between them that I assumed to be police) you blocked in your rush to cross the street. Nevermind that the crosswalk is on the other side of the road, and you had to manuever around barriers constructed to keep people from crossing on that side of the road to gain that extra 10 seconds.
When I’m mayor, drivers will be allowed to run right through pedestrians who exhibit callous disregard for crosswalks and right-of-way. They won’t even be required to stop; hit-and-run is not applicable in cases of right-of-way. When a 200 lb. person takes on a 2000+ lb. vehicle, (s)he takes the risk and must accept the consequences.
On the other side, the drivers who do not acknowledge when pedestrians have the right-of-way will also suffer the consequences. Pedestrians will have the right to drag them from their vehicles and beat the drivers with laptops, umbrellas and/or any other weapon of convenience.
Beating the cars is futile. What is needed is a good mass reaction, maybe a little car-tipping - I shy away from setting the cars aflame, though.
But it’s all predicated on right-of-way. I haven’t yet worked out how to enforce, but I’ll leave the details to my underlings. As future mayor, I will have the ideas, and leave others to implement my vision.
So remember, vote D_Odds in the next NYC mayoral election. Campaign slogan: I can’t be worse than Dinkins!
Flashing lights mean “Look around before dashing across the street.”
A flashing “Don’t Walk” means “Walk a little faster.”
A steady “Don’t Walk” means “Cross when the coast is clear while fixing approaching drivers with a death-ray glance.”
I mean, you don’t want everybody standing around like a bunch of tourists, do you, Mr. Micro-Manage Faux-Giuliani?
“Nevermind that the crosswalk is on the other side of the road, and you had to manuever around barriers constructed to keep people from crossing on that side of the road to gain that extra 10 seconds.”
I’m having trouble visualizing this. How far crosstown is that side of the road?
I’m thinking of the corner at West Street and Vesey Street, near the WTC site (aka The Big Hole in the Ground (BHG)). You are only supposed to cross West Street on the north side. As Vesey Street no longer runs across West Street (see BHG - there is only a narrow pedestrian walkway there now), barriers were set up to channel people to the crosswalks. As the majority of pedestrians are going to the World Financial Center (self-included), it means having to cross West Street (usually after a longish light) and then cross Vesey Street. Pedestrians waiting to cross will often go to the south side of the intersection to cross, hindering traffic.
The same thing was done in midtown Manhattan. To improve crosstown traffic flow (which is generally slower than walking), pedestrians were blocked from crossing on certain sides of the street (generally the side a vehicle making a right turn would enter). Now you can get river-to-river in about an hour instead of an hour and a half.
I’ll remember that next time I’m caught out in the rain trying to get one. That’s one potential Deputy Mayor off of my list.
AHunter3, that may be, but bodies have more give and laptops are too expensive to break on paint jobs. Besides, what cabbie is going to worry about a scratch on his car?
P.S. You will never find me trying to drive (known elsewhere in the US as park) in Manhattan during business hours. I’m insane, not suicidal.
I don’t get it - what blinking lights are you talking about? If you’re talking about blinking Don’t Walk signs you’re crazy - any young, healthy person can make it across the street before the light changes.
Three police cars with lights flashing, no sirens (except for one woop to get people to move out of the way - only somewhat effective).
I noticed today, going the opposite way than I was in my rant, there is a sign telling pedestrians to use the crosswalk (directly across is the corner of the WTC construction site - no signs). There are also lots of crowd barriers to try to herd pedestrians to the crosswalk. I’m contracting my city councilperson and suggesting giving the National Guardsmen target practice on jaywalkers (they’ll be allowed to also shoot at cars that run the red lights).
(Another rant is that the mass of humanity doesn’t give WTC workers a chance to turn into the site, even though they have a green left turn light. Once northbound traffic stops, the pack moves and the drivers never get the chance to make the turn during the short turn light.)
And just to clarify 100% - I’m not a driver ranting about pedestrians. I’m a pedestrian ranting about other pedestrians (and, to a lesser extent, drivers) who fail to yield proper right-of-way.
Are you new to New York? I’m just wondering because it seems you are under the impression that there are situations where pedestrians should yeild the right-of-way-- other than mortal danger.
Of course this rule applies whether I’m the pedestrian or the passenger (I’m not crazy, I don’t drive). I’ve been known to urge my husband “Hit the bastard! He obviously wants to die.”
Well, Biggirl, that’s why when I’m mayor, pedestrians (and drivers) will be in mortal danger when failing to yield right-of-way.
And believe me, when I drive on my Queens streets and someone (usually some male teenager with an overinflated sense of worth) saunters across the street on the diagonal, I feel the same way.
I got extra pissy that morning because the footwalkers were blocking police vehicles with lights flashing.
I’ve found that to get what you want in NYC, you simply have to be more insane than anyone you’re likely to encounter. This goes for whack jobs on the subway, asshole cab drivers, and yes, dipshit pedestrians that have a reckless disregard for their own lives.
When I am in my vehicle, here is how I deal with pedestrians that block the street when they’re not supposed to:
Reach down and turn off the traction control system
Light up the rear tires
Proceed toward the pedestrian, tires smoking and car fishtailing
Put a really insane, wide-eyed look on your face, such that if the pedestrian sees you through the windshield, (s)he will think, “This person is fucking batshit crazy and I had better get to the opposite curb before his front bumper takes me out at the knees.”
