Do you know what really pisses me off?

[gigi]

@Savannah

I’ve lost a skirt. It’s the beige one with the small floral design in black, and the lace edging…How can one lose clothes in a house, though? It’s not like I went out engaging in debauchery to the extent that I wandered home at dawn minus my skirt. I wore it to work. Then home. Argh.

Wait, are you sure you’re not wearing the skirt right now?

@LifeonWry

I have purchased seven pairs of cheater-reader glasses, so I won’t have to go looking for them every time I need them. I just stick a pair in every room and one pair in my purse.

My friend does this too and often ends up with more than one pair on top of her head!

@Rhubarb

But if you want to know what pisses me off, it’s almost always people. I am sometimes annoyed at animals, bothered by inanimate objects, or perturbed by the weather, but only people can truly piss me off.

“Ugh, I’ve had it with people.”
“Yeah, they’re the worst.”
/seinfeld

[Princhester]

@David Simmons

Next time I run into some old person I’ll pass that along.

I said older, not old!

[Rysdad]

@ultrafilter

The worst by far is driving down the road and realizing that your keys aren’t in your pocket, and you’re not quite sure where they are.

Really? You don’t realize they’re in the ignition?

If so, you win.

[ultrafilter]

@Rysdad

Really? You don’t realize they’re in the ignition?

If so, you win.

I figure it out eventually…

[gigi]

@ultrafilter

The worst by far is driving down the road and realizing that your keys aren’t in your pocket, and you’re not quite sure where they are.

I’ve mentioned this before, but I have a relatively common car and I have more than once driven by someone else’s thinking “I don’t remember parking there!”

[Anne_Neville]

@Princhester

David, the good news is that I’m reading a book on popular neurology at the moment that says that a study has shown that young people forget what they came into a room for precisely the same amount as older people. Older people just get more annoyed by it.

@ultrafilter

The worst by far is driving down the road and realizing that your keys aren’t in your pocket, and you’re not quite sure where they are.

Those are both a relief to hear. I’m not getting old or getting early-onset Alzheimers or something like that, and I’m not the only one who has ever momentarily panicked when, while driving, I checked my pocket for my keys and didn’t find them.

[Cat_Whisperer]

You old people are funny. I’m glad I’m not there yet. Now, what was it I meant to do today?

ETA: Our brains are just full, that’s all. I’ve got half a lifetime worth of stuff in there now. :eek:

[gigi]

I saw a couple of corny but good ones on this topic while looking for jokes for our quilt guild newsletter:

===============
Three sisters, ages 92, 94 and 96, live in a house together.

One night the 96-year-old draws a bath. She puts her foot in and pauses.

She yells to the other sisters, “Was I getting in or out of the bath?”

The 94-year-old yells back, “I don’t know. I’ll come up and see.” She starts up the stairs and pauses “Was I going up the stairs or down?”

The 92-year-old is sitting at the kitchen table having tea listening to her sisters. She shakes her head and says, “I sure hope I never get that forgetful, knock on wood.” She then yells, “I’ll come up and help both of you as soon as I see who’s at the door.”

Two elderly ladies had been friends for many decades. Over the years, they had shared all kinds of activities and adventures.

Lately, their activities had been limited to meeting a few times a week to play cards. One day, they were playing cards when one looked at the other and said, “Now don’t get mad at me … I know we’ve been friends for a long time, but I just can’t think of your name! I’ve thought and thought, but I can’t remember it. Please tell me what your name is.”

Her friend glared at her. For at least three minutes she just stared and glared at her. Finally she said, “How soon do you need to know?”