This is all kind of close to the surface for me. My mom died last week at 68, and I’ve been thinking a lot about the fact that when I was a kid and a 68 year old person died no one gasped and said “so young? My goodness.” The fact that more and more people are living into their 80s and 90s makes her death seem even crueler to me.
When I was my son’s age it seems to me that peers losing their grandparents aged in their late 60s and early 70s wasn’t particularly shocking.
When my husband died (in November) the first thing my father said to me was “People are going to say stupid stuff to you.” He was not wrong. Talking about it with another friend he suggested that whatever someone says I should try and hear it as “I really want not to add to your pain.”
I’m sorry for your loss.