Doctor Who. Rule #1: The Doctor lies. Other rules?

Cafe Society
#1

Just finished watching Doctor Who: Let’s Kill Hitler. (Outstanding episode, I thought, but that’s not what I’m here to talk about.)

Near the end of the episode The Doctor spouts a few numbered rules. I didn’t catch all of them, but I did catch:

Rule #1: The Doctor lies.

Are there other rules that have been mentioned in this series? My google-fu wasn’t strong enough to find a list of the rules anywhere.

So, what other rules have you heard? Feel free to list them here.

Is there a compendium of rules anywhere?

Thanks,
J.

#2

Such as it is: The Doctor’s Rules. Only #1 and #54 predate Let’s Kill Hitler.

#3

What makes you think that’s actually rule 1?

#4

The Doctor said so in the latest episode.

#5

Well, ok, but if the doctor can lie what’s to stop him from lying about what’s rule #1?

#6

True. It’s a show that doesn’t worry at all about continuity or making sense, as last night’s “Let’s Kill Hitler” episode shows, so you’re exactly right - he could be lying.

#7

(My one bump.)

Anybody else no of any more rules or list of rules?

J.

#8

Nope. The rules were basically just in this episode.

#9

#1 – Cardio
#2 – The Double Tap
#3 – Beware of Bathrooms
#4 – Seatbelts
#7 – Travel Light
#17 – Don’t Be A Hero
#18 – Limber Up
#22 – When In Doubt, Know Your Way Out
#31 – Check The Back Seat
#32 – Enjoy The Little Things

Oops, sorry, those are Zombieland rules…

I know, it’s
1; Collect Underpants
2; ???
3; Profit!

D’oh, those are the Underpants Gnomes rules…

Hmm, how about…

“Once you have their money, you never give it back…”

Darnit, that’s a Ferengi Rule of Acquisition…

Sorry, I got nothing…

#10

Gibbs’ Rules

#11

Rule #408: Time is not the boss of you!! I’m pretty sure that showed up in “Let’s kill Hitler” as well!!

#12

Rule #31: Rory Williams will die in 33% of all episodes he appears in.

Rule #19: 83% of all nefarious schemes are the work of either the Daleks or the Cybermen.

#13

Rule 6 – There is NO –
(I can’t go through with it).

#14

Maxim 27: Don’t be afraid to be the first to resort to violence.
No, wait, that’s Mercenaries…

#15

Rule 2: bowties are cool.*

*See rule one.

#16

Don’t know if it is more of advice than a rule, but #10 said:
“Always bring a banana to a party”…or something thereabouts.

Or, my favorite rule which crosses over generations:
If you redecorate, the Doctor will say, “I don’t like it”.

#17

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vGG0RSgJT1I

#18

The Doctor changes the numbers on his rules as it suits him and the situation.

Usually number 1 is “The Doctor lies” - not meaning he is a simple liar; meaning he lies when he thinks it is needed - (such as the way a spy would lie to protect his cover).

Rule number 2 is often, “Don’t wander off.”, but companions never obey that.

He also does say “Always bring a banana to a party” (because he likes banana daiquiries) I’m not sure that one ever got a number on it.

He says “Bow ties are cool” , sometimes it has a rule number, sometimes it doesn’t.

He quotes other rules, per each episode, but like I said, the numbers on the rules are not set, which befits travel in a “big ball of timey-wimey stuff”.

#19

Run.

#20

Can you cite an example of it having a rule number? I don’t recall it ever doing so.