I wonder just what kind of porn some of you people are watching. Seriously. It’s not all raunchy, disgusting, man is king, etc.
It gets tiring of hearing some make it out as though those who like porn are somehow filthy, or weird. There is a porn out there for everyone, that’s for sure, all kinds of styles, categories, whatever. There are some types of porn out there that I can’t stand, and lines I don’t cross. Scat? Bukkake? Golden Showers? Ew ew ew. But there is so much more out there than that. I like some kinky sex play, like the dom/sub deal, but only with someone I love, trust, and am monogamous with. Porn has never had a negative effect on my life. I encourage my husband to watch more porn so he can feel more comfortable bringing something to me that he might like to try out. I have a motto, in and out of the bedroom: “I’ll try anything twice.” Count me in as another who thinks porn is only bad for stupid people. If one can’t differentiate fantasy from reality, they’ve got bigger issues. However, I also don’t think porn is for everyone, intelligent or otherwise. Some people are just really uncomfortable with it, and that’s fine and shouldn’t be forced. But those who like it aren’t all nasty, trampy, slutty, sexist, misogynist dogs.
So, no, I don’t think porn is bad. But you knew that already, didn’t you?
I think I may know from where that gun part comes from, I remember reading stuff about a woman who at her time was a famous porn star, only to be revealed after about how her husband had basically forced her into this, including bestiality, and how at one point she did have a gun pointed at her to force her to do whatever.
(That’s what I vaguely remember, it was a sad article and I don’t think I’ve bookmarked it, but maybe another doper will remember things more acurately than me)
I wasn’t technically born in the early 90’s but I think 89 is close enough.
I look at porn. I have not yet had the pleasure of having a girlfriend, but I have absolutely no expectations about how that will work, let alone any unrealistic expectations based on porn.
When I first went to Europe ages ago, I was more than a bit surprised to see totally naked women stepping out of the shower - in a prime-time soap commercial on German television!
And walking down the streets in Germany, you would pass by a porno shop that displayed the covers of the magazines!
And then I noticed that despite the depravity, Germany was not made up of sex fiends and perverts - to the contrary - they didn’t see porn as some kind of dirty-old-man-in-a-trench-coat kind of way. They even have legal prostitution and lots of nude beaches, even in city parks. Most all of the Germans I met were normally sexually active folks - but those that had a few kinks didn’t mind mentioning them
and were not ashamed to ask.
So is porn bad? Nope.
What is bad is to relegate all porn as some kind of immoral first step on the sleigh ride to hell.
Porn has been around forever. They have found little porno ditties scrawled on walls by cavemen…the only difference is we now have a nice color monitor on our desk showing the same thing.
People fuck, and people like to see it. Get over it.
I don’t thnk exposure to calculus as a teenager is a bad thing. In fact, I expect it is better to have such exposure than to grow up in a void, and then all of a sudden be expected to integrate.
Presently, I expect that very few parents are able to guide their adolescents in making responsible decisions when using calculus. The comfort level just isn’t there. I wonder if this will ever change? Will parents who grew up with calculus be able to offer guidance to their children, or will children continue to face calculus on their own?
I wasn’t technically born in the early 90’s but I think 89 is close enough.
I look at porn. I have not yet had the pleasure of having a girlfriend, but I have absolutely no expectations about how that will work, let alone any unrealistic expectations based on porn.
Yes, but at what age did you start to look at said porn? 8? 9? 10? or 16? What type of porn was it? Hardcore S&M? Anal Sex? Fisting? Or garden variety screwing? These are the differences the article was talking about. If you read my initial reply I said “No, I don’t think porn is bad” hence the “no” in my first reply. The article I was referencing was children around the age of 12 and I’m sure since it was an on-going psychological study that it had a more complex methodology than “were you born in 1990, do you look at porn and how do you feel about women?” Personally, I don’t think 9 year olds should be exposed to harcore S&M or fisting etc. even though such activities might be completely ok to be exposed to at an older age.
I understood that it was only one of your reason. I just find it odd that it is a reason at all, for anyone.
Probably handle it like any other issue that women have to face. Not every woman looks like Jessica Alba or Elisha Cuthbert, what if her looks are unfavorabley compared to movie stars. Most will go through the growing up process, eventually becoming comfortable in their own skin. Some will do this quickly. Some will take a long time. Some will become anorexic. Some will get addicted to plastic surgery.
But I think it goes to a deeper philosophy. Both of us don’t like the idea of young girls being pressured to perform sexual acts they are not comfortable with. Your solution seems to be, change porn. My solutions is maybe girls should be raised to do things they want to, not what they are pressured to
I’m shocked by this thread, totally shocked. All this time I’ve been waiting for the day that I’m nailing the lady next door, and my girlfriend discovers us, and after a moment of anger/surprise, gets naked and joins in for a three-way. Other than doing it in the driveway, how can I make it any more obvious? Darnit.
Linda Lovelace. There were several stories going around of her husband’s control. Most of her early films (loops) were under coercion. Deep Throat, however, wasn’t.
Cognitive dissonance. Funny how people adapt to the prevailing norms of a community. Informed opinions are great, but I hate when they are sugar coated.
When I see women in porn, I see a person doing a job. It’s the same vacant look you get from the people working the drive-thru at McDonald’s. It’s an act.
No, no–that is not what I want to do. I would like some intelligent porn, as an alternative, but realize that that may be an oxymoron. I prefer written erotica, anyway.
My solution is close to yours–but would include not making a girl look at or experience porn, nor expect her to act like she is in a porn film.
I don’t really think that most guys do the above–but it’s out there.
IMO, someone who is watching porn all the time–with or without a real relationship, needs to get another set of priorities–I think that of any obsessive activitiy, not just porn.
On preview-I agree with ninteypercent --I see no “thrill” in watching the mechanical getting off of either sex. YMMV.
I’m talking about my purely personal morality. I’m a devout Catholic and I think it is immoral to gratuitously indulge oneself in pornography. However I do not feel porn is necessarily “bad” for most people. As for whether or not pornograpy is sinful, I tend to think that depends on the user.
You know, after years of hearing about how pornography creates “unrealistic” expectations (as if this somehow makes it more harmful than other forms of fictional entertainment), I was pleasantly surprised to find upon becoming sexually active how much MORE real life is like porn than I had thought. Yes, bizarre as it may seem, there are lots of women out there who like it dirty/kinky/on the face/etc. And many of them enjoy porn as well.
Of course, sex also has a lot of unglamorous aspects that don’t usually get shown in porn, but I don’t see the problem with that. Porn is fantasy, not sex education. Societies that are more open about sexual matters are less likely to see kids going to porn for education, rather than its intended use as entertainment.
That’s a disingenuous statement. Just because something is forbidden doesn’t mean it is hurtful, and just because something is hurtful doesn’t mean it will be forbidden.
And I don’t think pornography should be forbidden anyways.
Thing porn is horribly exploitative. He’s just a hand, how could he possibly consent?! Okay, he knows sign language, but he can’t even see the people he’s supposed to do the movie with!
The male-sex-face shots aren’t going away. (I think I saw this on HBO’s Pornocopia series) Most male porn performers cannot orgasm except through masturbation. When the director wants an ejaculation shot, the man stops thrusting and masturbates to orgasm. The close up of the man’s face is used to tie the shots together and give the appearance of a single sex act ending in ejaculation.
Back To The OP
Nope. Some of the things are really not what I’m interested in (scat, watersports, rape, for example). I have seen some women I’m convinced were junkies who would do anything for their next hit. Most of the time, it’s just a job. There is porn featuring women who are definitely not oppressed, and who are actually enjoying themselves.
