Does Anyone Want a Toaster? Or a Regularly Scheduled MMP?

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
101

Hey, Wintermute and Kn(insert something clever here)ckers - have you considered that maybe in a previous life you were each other?? That could also explain things! Or it could give you a headache trying to figure out how it would work… :confused:

I mowed my lawn, rushing because it was getting cloudy and thundery, but did it rain? Of course not! I got all hot and sweaty for nothing! OK, I would have gotten hot and sweaty anyway from mowing, but I could have done it at a leisurely pace.

I hate yard work.

102

FCM, knowing the guys on this board, you might want to be careful throwing words like “hot and sweaty”. Look, you’ve got them all excited now. ;D

103

Now, don’t give yourself a headache; here, lay down with this cold compress. Would you like the fan on you? I’ll leave this glass of iced coffee right here, and dim the lights. Better?

You’ve made it harder than it has to be; we could have been twins, or even just sisters. See, isn’t that easier? And it makes more sense.

104

Hey, I look forward to Friday the Thirteenths. I figure any day bad for so many ordinary people must be great for me. And I’m usually right. Another example of the egregiousness of me, so nyah.

Actually today has been pretty good except that I’m short about a day and a half of sleep. No major bleeders in the Blood Bank tonight, that’s always swell. A black cat did cross my path today but she always does that. Plus she chews on my hair for some odd feline reason. No bad luck there, but possibly some bald spots in the future.

Tomorrow will be even better.

I’m going out to tea. :slight_smile:

105

How would you like to be me?

We had snow in April, and I think I mowed my lawn for the first time this season on the first weekend in May. I’ve managed to do it twice since.

My lawn is turning into a freakin’ jungle, and I can’t mow it because it won’t stop raining.

And yet, my vegetable garden won’t produce anything because it’s been too cool and wet. 68[sup]o[/sup] highs in June are bogus.

How much is a ticket to paradise?

106

I am enormously fat. I just ate several pounds of pork at the Toronto barbeque competition. And then I ate the rest of it for dinner. There was a small brewery beer competition at the same location, but I don’t like beer.

I want to go back tomorrow.

107

I want cake. There’s nothing sweet in the house but peach frozen yogurt and I don’t want that. I want cake. Now. I will sing the praises of anyone who brings me some cake. Now. Or I may be forced to go to the store myself.

I want cake.

108

I want some nice, warm, gooey, chocolatey-chip cookies, just out of the oven.

But my frozen cookie dough is at home and I am not.

For at least three more hours.

Drat.

109

According to welby, you make the greatest chocolate cake on the planet. All by yourself. In your own house.

What’s the problem?

Is it the whole two-hour mixing-and-pouring-and-baking process?

You can have cake, you’re just lazy.

110

I don’t think for a moment that you people are dim, but I’d like to point out that the above post was in response to FairyChatMom. Drat you dwyr.

My Mommy makes the bestest chocolate chip cookies. She uses real butter and vanilla and stuff. Those cookies rip.

English people think that american “cookies” and english “tea biscuits” are equivalent, but they’re not.

Them english is missing out, bigtime.

111

So, of all the people here who have not actually addressed the OP, am I the only one who, when hearing about Rue and the possibility of someone getting a toaster, thought that he had gone bi-curious on us? :eek:

112

What can I say? I have a lousy sense of timing.

But I also had me some cookies.
So there.

113

Yes.

Yes, I think you are.

114

No, it’s the whole go to the store to get the ingredients I lack, find the proper pans, lug the heavy mixer out, clean up after the cake is in the oven, lug the heavy mixer back where it belongs, wipe up the mess I missed the first time, wait wait wait till the cake is cool enough for frosting, climb on the ladder to retrieve the cake storage thingy, put cake on storage thingy and frost it, then FINALLY have some cake!
Lazy, you say? I cordially invite you to kiss my big toe. :stuck_out_tongue: Anyway, it’s the next morning and I don’t want cake right now, so there.

Guess I told him, huh?