The dream I had last month is a nice, distinct story of God speaking to me in specific response to my prayers on a particular evening. I’m not Christian, I don’t study the Bible - I prefer Eastern religious writings - so when I say God I’m just using that as shorthand for all descriptions of the Infinite Is.
First you have to know two things about me; one, that I’ve been wrestling with a huge dilemma concerning my life’s work, a problem I’ve had for 20 years, through 37 jobs. And it’s only getting worse over time - when I had the dream I was deeply depressed about the responsibility and uncertainty of my choices. I knew what I wanted to do with my life, but didn’t have the courage to do it because I couldn’t see where it would lead, my desires seemed too selfish, uncertain, the results aren’t guaranteed. I want to find a sure thing, a legitimate thing, but my soul wants to accomplish something else. So I’ve been torn between the two, and that’s why I was praying for guidance.
The second thing to know is that I love to drive. I love my car, I’ve put 40,000 miles on it in the last 18 months.
My dream began in my husband’s car, with him at the wheel. We’re driving quickly in heavy traffic and the road is twisting, turning, going up and down hills. So that it’s impossible to see far ahead, the road disappears behind a curve or down an embankment. There’s a lot of cars and noise. And I’m telling Hubby to slow down, grabbing his arm, I can’t see. But he’s calm, confident about the road ahead. And he’s right, the road does continue past where I can see it. He’s showing me his route, and it keeps unfolding as he keeps driving.
Next I’m by myself, in my car. I’m driving on the most amazing road, right between two bodies of water. I can’t see the horizon or any landmarks, just water all around and huge sky. It’s a misty blue day, the water is clean like mirrors, the air is wet and fresh. I’m following a car, for some reason there’s two of us on this narrow road. And the water starts lapping up onto the road. I want to run, flee. Now it’s covering the road completely, and the other car has vanished. I’m by myself, and I’m driving on water…and then I realize it’s okay, the road is still there. First I was so afraid, then I felt such joy.
That’s what it’s like for me.