Does it bug you? The incessant pressure to bend your will?

In My Humble Opinion
1

Seems like kind of a strong way of putting it, “Bend your will”. But when I think about it, it’s not less than that. TV Commercials, stalkery internet ads, ‘news’ headlines intended primarily to divide the population–Bing is really good for those, pitting Boomers against Milennials, insisting GenX doesn’t give any fucks, lately trying to gaslight me into believing I think about The Roman Empire all the time (maybe once a year in reality, if someone else brings it up. Adventure Time, however…).

It didn’t used to bother me too much until I realized these are more than attempts to inform me about products and ideas. In fact, NOTHING exists anymore to simply inform…unless you’re willing to appease a paywall. By extension, I’ve come to learn that strangers do not approach unless they want what they think you’ve got. Lovely weather and you’re just sitting on a park bench to take in the onset of autumn (been gorgeous in Denver this past week), if someone sits next to you it’s not just for simple conversation and mutual enjoyment of a cool breeze, there will be a pitch. It’s like someone put the They Live sunglasses on me, and now I can’t unsee the cold, mechanical world we are all trapped in. I know a couple people who value ME, as opposed to the support I can give them. But beyond that, the world is not just lonely but incessantly predatory as well.

Anyone else getting that? And does it bug you? If that’s a yes and a no, what is your secret? Because it’s really putting the sour into life.

2

As the kids said years ago: “touch grass”.

3

Bing is a reprehensible piece of shit. Everytime my computer updates, which is way to often, Microsoft tries to make Bing my home page, and it is always the first page when you open a new tab. Clutter full of internet influencing crap. And they wonder why nobody likes Bing.

Everything on the internet is marketing now. Everything. Try searching for the simplest thing and the first few pages will be selling something. Groupthink is now the standard. If you do not think the same as others, if you question anything outside the message of the day, you will be voted way down the page, or banned.

Fortunately most of the young people posting in the internet Groupthink do not vote. They can be ignored until they grow up, if ever. This is where the people formerly called they Silent Majority come in.

Pay no attention to the people behind the curtain. You are fed a message, everyday, of the things that you should be concerned about and the real issues are never addressed.

4

You’re right that there is a LOT of that. But there is also a LOT that is not that. I talk to people on busses, at street corners, at the beach, in bars, and in parks with no intention of selling them anything. I don’t find those people selling me either.

If one has no acquaintances, no friends, and no neighbors, and one doesn’t live in a part of the country where strangers talk comfortably, then yeah, there’s not a lot left of other people but those you are buying from or those selling to you.

This little corner of the internet has lots of people interacting without selling. Web search results loaded with advertising? Not so much.

You can block abut 90% of the ads on 90% of the websites. You can avoid tendentious TV channels and YouTube channels. If the “volume” of the outside world is a bit much, there is a volume knob you can turn to reduce it a lot.

But only you can decide to do that and turn the knob.

5

May I just say “Thank you for this post!”

I just hadn’t quite put my arms around this dilemma yet.
Just keep getting more and more pissed off!

It’s getting harder to be enthused about “the Internet” and
this is the main reason why!

Sincerely, THANKS!

6

Maybe not everybody is trying to sell you something, maybe it’s just negativity bias?

But the best way to change your perception of the world is to change the way you act. It could be as simple as complimenting a stranger. The other day a man was whistling a tune and I told him I thought it sounded very nice. He wasn’t selling me anything. I was having a bad day and it really did cheer me up, hearing the whistle and giving a complement.

~Max

7

I don’t feel the same pressure as the OP, but I do have a source of stress that feels more and more incessant. For me, there is a feeling of greater and greater pressure to sell me things and / or up-sell me. Everyone wants my money, those entities are doing less and less to give me any value for it in return, and the bureaucracy associated with necessary expenditures is way worse.

I’ve always tried hard to avoid advertising. I won’t tolerate commercials on TV, radio or podcasts. They get instantly silenced and skipped, no exceptions. I can say without exaggeration I haven’t seen or heard a full commercial in years. Online, I train myself to avoid looking at the ubiquitous ads and pop-ups.

That’s all fine, it requires little effort from me. But would you like to rent an apartment? Fill out this application, provide references, pay fees… Want a loan for any reason? This absurd number, your credit score, which they are very reluctant to share with us or even explain how it’s computed… it controls everything.

Food costs more, and there are less cashiers which means we wait longer at the supermarket. Oh, but they’ve done us the favor of providing self checkout, which also requires a cashier because of how often it fouls up, but we can now do the work for the store.

Want health care? Get insurance. Oh, you’re changing jobs but need to continue a treatment or medication? Well, we tie health insurance to your job, so… Kindly go off and die. Or just die with insurance, because they’ll fight tooth and nail to not pay for anything. Which is why I choose not to have health insurance while I’m unemployed - I have no doubt they’ll try to screw me over if I actually tried to use it.

You know, I’ve changed my mind. As I write this I find my real issue is that I have to share oxygen with people who approve of all the nastiness I just described. I remember the first time I saw people (we later called them “Tea Partiers”) at town halls red in the face, spitting while they screamed about how we shouldn’t possibly make our health care system better. Seems quaint now, because those people later showed up at Charlottesville and in DC on Jan 6. But these are the people who keep us stupid, and I’m really starting to resent it.

8

An awareness of what the OP describes has served to enhance my already considerable native suspicion and cynicism.

9

In what possible way does this change, or even influence, the constant barrage of high pressure sales tactics?

10

I recently started visiting my library again (thanks to a SDMB post of all things). Librarians are and always have been awesome, selfless people. Maybe if you all like reading books, visiting a library will be a breath of fresh air.

For years, my local community college would let me use their facilities to access subscription content that would normally be inaccessible to a non-student, non-professional. (Now that I’m back in school, I can use my school for access.)

You don’t necessarily need to sign up for a library card. I was visiting Houston earlier this year and had a couple hours to spare while Dad saw his doctor. I drove to the closest public library, which was right next to a school. They wouldn’t let me check out a book (as I live in Florida, not Texas, I wouldn’t want to anyways), but I was free to read anything I liked while I was there. So I read some parts of a book about the history of American Blues, and then some short stories from an anthology of old mystery serials.

Even on the internet there are sites like gutenberg.org which let you read tons of books for free, or khanacademy.org for free educational materials. We have more free information at our fingertips than a person of yesteryear would ever have dreamed of.

Keywords, your and perception. :wink:

~Max

11

Those should easily counteract methods of influence based on decades of solid research. :face_with_raised_eyebrow:

12

Pretty soon I’ll probably be talking to myself on buses, at street corners, at the beach, in bars and in parks. But I’ll still be suspicious that the person talking to me has a hidden agenda.

13

What weighs heavy on my mind lately is Carl Sagan talking about the free exchange of information and how it will make the world a better place.

Imagine how devastated he would be if he were alive today.

14

Pain, even agony, is no more than information before the senses, data fed to the computer of the mind. The lesson is simple: you have received the information, now act on it. Take control of the input and you shall become master of the output.

~ Chairman Sheng-ji Yang, “Essays on Mind and Matter”

~Max

15

You are quoting a fictional book from a fictional author from a 24 year old video game. Not impressed.

16

Welcome to the internet!
Have a look around!
Everything that brain of yours can think of can be found
We’ve got mountains of content
Some better, some worse
If none of it’s of interest to you, you’d be the first.

It was always the plan to put the world in your hand.

[MANIACAL LAUGHTER]

Can I interest you in everything, all of the time?
Apathy’s a tragedy, and boredom is a crime!

17

I’m not sure I follow. I can act like a clown, and the world will continue on as it had intended. I could act like I don’t notice all the pressure all the time, but…no, I can’t do that anymore than I could act like a Doberman isn’t gnawing on my leg. I have wondered about something like negativity bias, when you look for something that’s all you’ll see. But when I have looked for the good, I only saw less putrid corruption.

And yes, the internet is finally what made me say something. I just wanted to know something obscure-ish, like do I need to be mindful of my aquarium’s mineral content to ensure the safety of my snails and can I throw crushed eggshells into the tank without screwing up the rest of the chemistry. No answers, but plenty of opportunities to buy eggs, snails, aquarium hardware, lolitas, trout cameras…

18

The problem with vague fictional words of wisdom are:

  1. The fictional character cannot be any wiser and/or more knowledgeable than the real person that created them in he first place, and
  2. Those fictional words of wisdom are only designed to work in the fictional world the author creates.
19

When it comes to search engines, you are not the customer-you are the target the real customers are aiming at.

20

Not long after I bought my new laptop a year ago, I found a way to hide of all that but I don’t remember how I did it. Play around with the settings (maybe personalization?). Now when I open a new tab, I just have a random picture with a search bar and a few widgets. I have to scroll down to see any of the content, which I never do. Much better experience.