Not my wife. A wife.
Is there no limit to what can be blamed on boomers? This type of “humor” way precedes the boomer generation.
When used like this, I think “boomer” has lost its connection with the Baby Boomer generation specifically. “Boomer humor” is just humor that was common in earlier generations, but is considered cringe, problematic, and possibly offensive today. It’s humor that is not merely seen as outdated, but also uncool, with possible unfortunate implications.
Contrast this with dad jokes, which also tend to be outdated humor, but people find harmless but ironically funny.
That said, considering the reactions that term has had here, I would not tend to use it–especially since the previous posts had already conveyed the underlying concepts well enough.
……
At the very least, Barney did:
I have seen the phrase “ball and chain” used towards a man, but only when the spouse was also male.
Beat me to it!
And I can’t find a clip, but yes, Fred was guilty too. She was leaving, and Fred told Pebbles under his breath, “Say goodbye to the nice old battle ax”.
Or Stan Freberg.
Yeah, I think a reasonable interpretation nowadays might be “humor that only the elderly, i.e., primarily Boomers, still think is funny”.
And the specific expression “ball and chain” for “wife” is attested from at least 1920.
In its original, non-ironic usage, yeah, always wife. Young people in modern days? Could go either way, but I’ve only heard it used ironically, as @Esprise_Me articulated perfectly in the quoted post.
Let’s try to give credit where it’s due. “Ball and Chain” was originally sung and written by Big Mama Thornton. Joplin copied her version.
Ball & chain, clearly that’s a domineering wife. “Battle Axe” that was my grade 6 teacher.
I think it originally meant the woman. Men wanted to go out and leave the woman at home to take care of the kids. She would complain and was seen as the person holding the man back from having a good time.
Nowadays, I think, people apply it to men or women as one or the other in a relationship is likely to be the person who doesn’t want to go out and holds the other back. Friends will tell their friend with the stick-in-the-mud SO that their SO is the “ball-and-chain.”
It is a bit dated though.
I’ve also only heard “ball & chain” used to refer to a wife, never a husband. I believe that a plain reading of the phase is neutral, even if it’s useage isn’t.
My interpretation was never that the “ball and chain” was preventing the husband from going out and doing fun things. She was preventing him from going out and doing fun people. As in, if he weren’t married, he’d be sleeping around freely, but now, because of his cruel imprisonment in the bonds of matrimony, he’s not allowed any more to do what’s only natural for him.
The double standard isn’t inherent to the literal meaning, but it’s definitely there in the typical usage.
I’m going with the consensus. When the term “ball and chain” is used in this context, it is overwhelmingly referring to a wife.
I disagree. It was predominantly said to other men as a reason that the husband couldn’t go out with them (or had to fight through complaints to go out with them) to the bar or ballpark or other gathering of the boys. How many men in mid-century America would complain to their friends that their wives were annoying because they couldn’t openly sleep with other women?
Everything is undercut with the double standard, true. Some people must have used it as code. But the public uses of ball-and-chain referred to public fun.
Similarly, some men have referred to their wives as “SWMBO” (“She Who Must Be Obeyed”). But I’ve never seen a mention of husbands being called “HWMBO”. This, despite the ancient Biblical command to wives to obey their husbands, routinely repeated to (almost) this very day in marriage ceremonies.
The reference comes from H. Rider Haggard by way of Rumpole of the Bailey (who referred to his wife that way).
I disagree too. I can’t think of a context where the ball-and-chain referred to sexual freedom. It’s a more general, “I can’t have fun anymore cause my spouse is keeping me in line/wants me home/I have responsibilities, etc. and can’t go to the bar with the boys and slam back drinks till closing time.”