Speculating about it being against the law? Or police policy? Yah, that’s a mountain.
For that matter, I have never written an OP complaining about someone committing a faux pas. Nor have the vast bulk of Dopers. And even in cases where people do, it’s about people being very seriously rude. That said, I will happily grant that it is better to write about it on a message board than to start a humongous fuss about it in the real world.
Everyone, please stay on the subject of the thread and the content of the posts in that thread. All remarks of a personal nature are out of line here. Start Pit threads as necessary.
I am not in the mood to go through this thread post by post and issue warnings. It is in your best interest not to make me regret that decision.
twickster, MPSIMS moderator
Oh jesus. Well fuckin-forgive me bulk of fuckin Dopers please.
I’ll try to think of a good cupcake recipe to share.
I only respond in kind.
On precisely ONE thread of yours I was presumptious and rude and cursed and got a warning for it - you and I communicated via PM on that score and I was the one who initiated that discussion. I’ve barely ever posted to anything else you’ve written here.
So, don’t give me dishonest whining crap about history or any of your silly insults or lies about “time and time again.” Especially when you are apparently unwilling to answer any of the points I’ve raised here in a pretty damn polite way. I’m not the only person to note that you dance around anything you can’t answer.
Ugh. You’re on my ignore list now because you are a poopy-head. Also predictable and boring. (Hopefully “poopy-head” is allowed outside of the Pit.)
For ignoring moderator instructions to refrain from personal comments and off-topic squabbling.
twickster, MPSIMS moderator
For personal insults and telling someone they’re on your ignore list (which is against the rules).
twickster, MPSIMS modertor
Female, and I have plenty of grievances about harassment, about misuse of handicapped access facilities, people misusing handicapped placards, locations not having handicapped access facilities available or what they have is totally unsuited for any level of handicap beyond a single cane. I just rarely go about whining about it. I could have gotten my previous employers place of business raked over the coals for violations in the handicapped access areas.
Yah, my “testosterone” comment was sort of flippant and I don’t doubt there are many daily grievances for folks who are disabled.
To be clear - I really believe that if there’s a clear violation, people should speak up and effect change. But the three people I mentioned are good friends, we piss and moan about life in general, and I never hear anything about violations or grievances or altercations from any of them.
I thought the disabled woman who lived on $714/month was merely an “acquaintance”? Now she’s a “good friend”? Hmm, how things change to fit the situation…
I thought the disabled woman who lived on $714/month was merely an “acquaintance”? Now she’s a “good friend”? Hmm, how things change to fit the situation…In fact, didn’t you go out of your way to say she was not a friend?
ETA: yeah, right here: Should I call the police on this guy, why or why not? - In My Humble Opinion - Straight Dope Message Board
Just to be clear on this point: in no way did I imply that you owe any of us an apology. However, when you write an OP titled “Don’t know how to feel…”, it is entirely apropos to respond that you are overreacting to a non-event.
I certainly didn’t mean for the OP to turn out this way. I merely thought the officer crossed a line with the question. I didn’t make an issue out of it at the scene whatsoever, and I only wanted to open up the topic for discussion here.
Yes, she is one of the three; what an acute memory you have. If you go back and read my posts in that thread you’ll see that I considered her a good, close friend for many years but dialed that back to “acquaintance” in the last year because of her weird codependent relationship with her druggie son.
None of this is contrary to anything else I have posted. You apparently read and remembered that other thread of mine and thank you for that; i am impressed by your attention to detail. Since you apparently have it handy, please do post the link to my thread. It would save me time and clarify it for everyone else. 
Sorry, simul-posting and you added the link after I posted.
See my post # 16 which clarifies what I said here.
Yes, but the title of the OP makes it sound more like a “was this not quite right?” kinda thingy.
Then, the actual post is more like “here I am all innocent and all and then here comes Mr. Dick cop”.
Then, when many (most?) folks here tend to think the cop was mostly just doing his job and you are being oversensitive or unrealistic you get all defensive, and really IMO start reaching to defend your point of view.
Its fine to open it to discussion. Just don’t get bent out of shape when most folks don’t agree with you.
Or how about the whole post…
I have an acquaintance for whom I alternately feel sympathy for - she is legitimately disabled and lives on $714 a month - and frustration - she allows her 34-year old son and his girlfriend to live in her house without paying a penny towards rent or other living expenses.
The son and the girlfriend refuse to look for work, donate plasma, or basically do anything at all to pay their way. Son has an Android phone, a crack cocaine habit, smokes cigarettes and has comandeered the only family vehicle.
He and the girlfriend do contribute a teensy amount every month through scrapping (often illegally) and between $100 and $200 a month they get from gummint assistance.
However, very often that money is spent on drugs and smokes; son and girlfriend spend a lot of their time driving the lone family vehicle around the north end of the city hanging out with drug dealers, dog-fighters and other assorted low-lifes. Son does not have a drivers license and has at least one warrant out in another county for non-payment of child support.
Acquaintance is often afraid of the son, who throws violent tantrums when he doesn’t get what he wants (use of the vehicle, money for smokes, etc) and also, concurrently, has a sick, unhealthy, over-protective, over-attachment to him. IMHO. She will not tolerate any criticism of the situation, and while acknowledging that she is not doing him any favors by enabling his immature and shitty behaviour, pays lip-service only and nothing has changed for several years.
The acquaintance is a good person in many respects - she has dedicated what’s left of her life to volunteer work, she is a kind person, she is weak but not bad.
Here’s my dilemma - I can completely walk away from the relationship at any time, but while I stop short of calling the acquaintance a true friend, I like her and would like to help “fix” the situation. But I wil NOT be another enabler in the situation.
I can call the cops and give them name, address, vehicle license and description - they may or may not pick son up for the warrant, given that it’s in another county - however, if they do, the lone family vehicle will be impounded and there is NO money to reclaim it. Which really screws up my acquaintance, who owns the vehicle and depends on it to get to doctor and physical therapy visits. There is no reliable or viable public transportation where she lives. Also, while I have it on good faith and evidence that he is involved in drugs, dog-fighting (peripherally and by association, not directly) and illegal scrapping, I don’t have enough detail to give the incredibly overworked and under-funded local police department any clear reason to pick him up.
Of course, now that I have this written down, it looks so obvious - continue backing the fuck away from the entire situation and sick family dynamic (I’ve been doing this over the last several months), disengage and don’t look back.
But I do care about the acquaintance-not friend, perhaps wrongly, but I do. I think there’s an element of domestic abuse - which is not limited to partner-on-partner - and I really think the druggie son and his nasty little girlfriend ought to be removed from the breeding pool for ever and ever. On the other hand, I suspect my acquaintance has some sort of dysfunctional need for these leeches in her life, and my idea that if son and skanky girlfriend were removed from the situation and then everything will be OK may be dead, completely, wrong, McWrong,wrongitty-effing wrong-o.
Bolding mine. It seems pretty clear that you want the reader to be clear that you consider this person JUST an acquaintance. That’s it.
(sorry about the duplicate post in your other thread btw, that was an accident)
I absolutely don’t. It’s the manner in which that “disagreement” is expressed that is bs to me. And because of that, I tend to look at any subsequent argument coming from that poster as being bs. Like the disagreement comes first, and the reasons why come later (if at all).
Then, IMO you REALLY need to look at things with more of an open mind. Plenty of people have given you actual reasons why they think they (and/or the cop) are right and you are wrong (and all the shades of grey inbetween).
Its not like you are the only Obama hater in a forum filled with Obama lovers and that bias is bleeding over into your handicap themed threads.
I’d say most posters who think you are bit off when it comes to stuff regarding handicapped issues have formed that opinion ONLY based your other postings having to do with handicapped stuff. And thats not some unrelated bias, thats just mounting evidence regarding the topic in question.
[Muffin backs slowly away, wondering if the description of the attitude of the officer in the OP was reasonably objective or not.]