"Don't Move Firewood" -- "Stop Forest Pests" (stupid highway signs)

You know those big signs over the highway that can show messages about traffic jams, road work, etc – in letters with lit-up lightbulbs so the message can change?

The signs in our area now flash two messages:

        PESTS **

That has got to be the most idiotic use of a highway sign. Plus it will cause accidents from people thinking there’s something IMPORTANT they have to read about, like a turned-over tractor trailer.

What stupid highway signs does your state display?

It’s not stupid. One of the major reasons Colorado’s wildfires were so bad is because the Pine Bark Beetle has killed large swaths of trees. Moving firewood spreads the beetles. Around here, the primary pest is the Emerald Ash Borer, which is reponsible for devestating the trees in many, many neighborhoods in southeast Michigan, including the one I grew up in. Again, moving firewood spreads the pest. That’s why they want you to only obtain firewood from local sources.

Plus, if you have the system in place, you might as well use it for public service announcements when you are not informing of immediate traffic incidents. And you want the signs turned on regularly so you know they are in good working order for when you really need them. So be glad it’s not DRINK COCA COLA.

Besides, what drivers will get into accidents from reading that PSA that would not get into one trying to read the report of an overturned tractor-trailer?

There is(or was) a giant sign next to a highway flashing:


Unless we’re talking monster movie size giant snails how is this relevent to road safety?

Ditto Diceman. If you like forests and all the benefits they provide, you don’t want people spreading inscect invaders with them when they go camping this fall. Asian longhorned beetle; emerald ash borer; more here; and here. Seems a decent way of spreading the message to me.

I amuse myself on long drives by adding inappropriate punctuation or addends in my head.

Don’t Move! Firewood!
Stop, Forest Pests!
Warning giant snails in the area: don’t get hit by cars, giant snails!
Trucks over 12 Tons Must Weigh…a lot.
Yes, I find “Collaborate and Listen” the height of stop sign sticker humor, too…

At one game store I went to someone scrawled this on the stop sign:


Drink Ovaltine!

There’s one on an overpass in DC that says “your vehicle height is over 13 ft”, instead of something that makes sense, like “Clearance 13 ft.”

Giant African snails.

They are movie monster size (almost) and besides being incredibly destructive, hitting one could produce enough slime to cause you to momentarily lose control.

Is this an electronic sign, or a painted one? If this is electronic, I can imagine it making a lot of sense to display that warning if sensors detect an oversized truck approaching.

In the case of Ohio, such a sign would be outdated. A few years ago, Ohio banned moving hardwood from one county to another because of the Emerald Ash Borer. Now that the EAB has been detected in 63 counties, the quarantine has been lifted because Ohio’s Ash trees are screwed anyway.

Yes, there are several electronic automated signs in DC that flash this when an overheight truck is sensed approaching a low overpass.

Of course, in our sensory overloaded lifestyle, you can imagine how often these signs go unnoticed…

Holy #@@!.. I welcome our new snail overlords.

Electronic. It seems be on all the time, not sensor-activated. It’s been that way for years, though I haven’t driven past it for a couple of months, so it might have been fixed now, for all I know. It’s on the SE/SW Freeway just past the Maine Ave. exit, eastbound.

We could introduce some Frenchmen to eradicate the Escargot Grande Afrique, non?

I saw this sign once at a Delaware Interstate ramp:


and thought about how many other states might have information police, and if they force you to take information, or they take information from you.

Ohio’s got:
CALL #677

I can just imagine the Drug Traffickers reaching for their cell phones now…

There are these traffic monitoring signs on the Northern State Parkway, in Long Island (many of the different LI parkways have them). But they don’t update themselves as fast as traffic accidents happen. Many’s the time I’ve been sitting in completely stopped traffic, looking at a sign informing me that all traffic is moving smoothly for the next 3 miles. DAMN YOU!

I always chuckle at the
“Police enforce DWI Laws”
sign. Perhaps people wonder if the sanitation department or some other agency does that job instead.