Don't you hate it when a camel walks up and sits down on you?

I hate it when this happens to me; it’s getting so I just let the damn fences go unpainted:

Oh dear! I seem to have misplaced my sympathy! I’m laughing too hard to find it…

This is local news here. The morning radio show hosts are having a field day. I didn’t even know we had a camel nearby…

Having trouble breathing?

“Oh my, I find it a little difficult to draw breath with a 3/4 ton animal sitting on my midsection.”

Seems like it be a blow to your self esteem for a camel to mistake you for a chair.

What I’d like to know is, how can a camel just sneak up on you and sit down atop you before you’ve even noticed it?

Stealth Camel?

I think we’ve just discovered Rummy’s new secret weapon for Iraq…

Well, it says right on the packages that Camels can cause a variety of respiratory problems.

In Soviet Russia, Camel sits on you!

When I tell that joke, I get Pitted. :frowning: :smack:

That’d be a first.

Clearly, You Bastard has moved to America. You know, we have wild camels in the mid-west. They’re remnants of a US Army project in the mid 1800s. Somewhere, I have a picture of a camel with a hump mounted Gatling Gun. No, I am not making this up. Weapons Through The Ages? Coffee table book, white cover.

Poor woman… I hope the toe didn’t leave a mark.

I guess she shouldn’t have walked that mile.

I would pay good money to hear the tape of that 911 call.

Op: 911, what’s your emergency?
Caller: I’m on the ground and there’s a camel on me!
Op: You’re on the ground with a what on you?
Caller: A camel! A camel! I can’t breathe!
Op (firing up EMD protocols and selecting “Respiratory Distress”): You’re having trouble breathing?
Caller: Yes, because there’s a camel on me! I was painting and this camel snuck up behind me and sat on me, please hurry!
Op (unselecting “Respiratory Distress” and hovering between “Animal Attack” and “Drug Overdose”): A camel snuck up behind you and sat on you?
Caller (muffled): Oh God…Oh God…He has gas…I can’t breathe…
Op: Okay, ma’am, we’ve got help on the way, they’ll be there soon. Try not to move…
Caller: THERE’S A CAMEL ON TOP OF ME!

Not to kill the humor worm here, but camels actually move quite silently and are known for playing “pranks” like biting off your ear or sitting on you when you’re not looking. The US Army tried to establish a Camel Corps in the mid 19th Century for use for transport in the arid regions of the US. While the camels (mostly bactrians) were vastly better suited for the environment than horses or mules their disposition and unsuitability to traditional equine husbandry methods made the venture problematical and they were eventually released into the wild, where they died off after several situations.

I guess the event in the OP sounds kind of funny to people who’ve never been around the animals, but to someone who has worked in proximity to them, it’s pretty typical behavior of these vile animals, and it sure isn’t funny to think of being bodily crushed by one.

Next up: let’s laugh at the guy who got eviscerated by an emu.

Stranger

Camel: What a day! Time to lie down for a little nap. Let’s see . . . pile of straw, freshly mowed grass . . . say, that lady over there looks comfy!

Seriously, what would make a camel want to sit on someone? It doesn’t speak very well for their parenting abilities, either. “Honey, I Squashed the Kids.”

I liked the bit about “there is no protocol on something like this”. Of course, I see what the guy means, but the sentence can also sound as though he is expressing some dismay at the lack of proper etiquette displayed by this socally uncouth camel.

Stranger - can’t we laugh and feel sympathy at the same time? And, btw, having people attacked by an emu used to be quite a staple of British T.V.

Oh, all right, I cannot tell a lie, it was a puppet emu, I admit. It became a bit less obstreperous after it attacked Billy Connolly and Conolly decided to retaliate, as I recall. Ah, the T.V. of the 1970s. O, the nostalgia.

(Channelling Cecil Adams) “This may help explain the historically sluggish market in pet camels.”

Didn’t Terry Pratchett try and worn the world about camels in one of his books(Pyramids maybe)? They are very smart animals and extremely foul temperred. Live and learn as they say - I for one shall be even more vigilant about the camel threat from now on.

Maybe it was Triumph, the Insult-Comic Camel?

“Thees looks like a nice lady . . . For me to seet on!