I’d like to see a parent stand up to "Dr."Phil with something like:
"you don’t know me, you don’tknow my circumstances, and I resent your ill-considered snap judgements. Please don’t patronize me; I have no intention of providing a spectacle for you to ramble about?!
There, that oughta shut him up!
Or could it be “Moving In” with Pat Croce, former Philadelphia 76er’s trainer (and later part owner) and now a “motivational speaker”?
(Or perhaps 2 people had the same bad idea and managed to sell it.)
That might be the one I saw promos for, looks like the same guy.
He and his producers never fail to make it quite clear that what they are doing on the show is NOT a cure. They then go on to explain that the work takes place after the show is over, that it IS in fact up to the guest, and most often with the assistance of experts in the field necessary for what ails each specific guest. The show frequently pays for this continued actual treatment at various well known centers.
Nor does he scold or harrass people in order to cure actual disorders. For those who’ve shown up on the show with disorders of some sort, he refers them to specialists, and generally on his dime.
Though I occasionally enjoy his show (though not this new season, so far it seems very boring), there are lots of things that I disagree with him about (like every other normal human, we don’t all agree on everything), but based on what the complaints about him seem to consist of, both here and IRL, it seems that people aren’t really paying attention to what he’s saying. Rather, they’re seeing a few minutes of one of his shows, and then getting mad at that, and basing their whole opinion of him on those few minutes.
Well I have heard people say “you don’t know me or my circumstances” to Dr Phil. I watch his show almost every day. I enjoy the show although I do not really enjoy all of the nepotism.
I also plan to watch tonight’s special. I’m making a special point to remember to watch it.
I like the plain truth approach he uses. I had enough of that “my poor feelings” shit with my brother. All that coddling helped so much. No one told my mother to wake up and that her kid was on a collision course with prison. They told her he wasn’t getting enough attention and was acting out because he was bored in school.
It is also entertaining. I got a good chuckle out of yesterday’s “you get me another 3some or I leave you” husband. Not enough :rolleyes: in the world for that guy’s cluelessness. “I have leukemia - you need to do this for me to prove you love me.”
He does not say he is fixing people’s problems in a 15 minute segment. He works with people before and after the shows. You see the sound bites the producers want - no one debates that. But some people really do get helped by this. He also provides and pays for all kinds of things for people who need these services. Kids get to go to private schools, counselling, rehab… When he did his first “Family” he provided all kinds of support to the girl who was pregnant. He helped her explore all the options available to her and the baby and let her come to her own decision. He also explained to mom to get her head out of the sand and get the kid on birth control before she ends up with another grand kid! So many people are afraid to admit teens are having sex and need to protect themselves once they start down that road.
What’s the benefit of putting this stuff on TV? Well - I always thought that it was so maybe someone might see themselves or someone else in the person featured and it might just wake them up.
I guess I will prep myself for the rotten fruit about to come my way. 
Well, they can lob some of the fruit at me too. I don’t care. I watch the show anyway.
In August of 2001 I managed to get through on the phones for Oprah tickets and just picked the 9/18 taping at random. Turned out that was a Dr. Phil day. Also turned out that Dr. Phil was preempted so that Oprah could do a tribute to 9/11 victims. As the producers were announcing this, boxes of kleenex magically appeared throughout the audience.
But what got me were the ladies who were absolutely furious at not being able to see their beloved Dr. Phil. They sighed. They groaned. They had fits. They wanted tickets to other tapings. This was not a small issue, they kept bringing it up - one of them complained that she’d flown all the way from California to see Dr. Phil.
That’s what bugs me about him - I think a really honest guru doesn’t encourage followers. Where superficial issues need superficial remarks, then I think he does an excellent job. And this is a good thing. His sayings are pithy and fun and they have the ring of truth. But I think he sees himself as the village wise man and he’s not quite that smart; if he were, he’d be a lot more humble.
Actually he doesn’t. See himself as the village wise man that is. He makes it quite plain that he’s just a simple country boy, and that his advice is really just common sense that ANYONE can do. He says his role is in just in helping people see it. Similarly to how sharing problems with a friend or family member can make it more clear to you (well collective you, maybe some people don’t need a “mirror” or a wake up call, some do, and those are the ones he’s helping). He makes this apparent both in his books, and at at least one point, usually more, during the show.
I agree with your points re: some of his rabid followers, but as to their actions? And as to his being “famous” now? That’s TV and the media. It happens with all “famous” people. I actually never watched Oprah, so I had no idea when I bought a Dr. Phil book many years ago, that he was even on Oprah. I was just browsing at Border’s and looked through a book thinking “hmmmm, this sounds user friendly” or some such. For me it was the other way around when I first saw his show on TV. Saaaay, that’s the guy whose book I bought X years back. Not Oooooh there’s Dr. Phil from Oprah’s, new book.
I’ve heard people complain that he either “beats up on” or just “tells people what they want to hear”. Yeah, I imagine that in a show where only 15 minutes is alloted to each case, that it could come off looking like that, especially if you tune in before, or after he’s given one of his many “there ARE no 8 minute cures, the real work takes place AFTER the show” disclaimers.
But in writing, he talks plain and simple. And in a very “no excuses, YOU do the work” way.
And as a normal human, of COURSE he’s not perfect. He makes the point several times during his shows that he could be wrong and HAS been wrong before, and that he makes mistakes, and that people are of course free to make their own decisions.
As to his saying, as another poster thought, that there is no metabolic reason for obesity, that’s just not true. What he actually DID say, in his book as well as on the challenge shows, was to go to your physician and to rule OUT those causes, and once you’ve done that, and know that in your case it isn’t metabolic or an illness, at THAT point you have no excuses etc.
I can see where the doe-eyed worship of any celebrity, including doc phil can be offputting to those seeing only small snippets of the show, but if you’re gonna hate him, and think he’s full of it, at least do so on HIS own words, not the silliness and hero worshipping behaviour of his audiences, or on a small sound-bite you see in passing while channel surfing.
I didn’t see his show last night, but I heard them talking about it on Howard Stern today.
They were all enraged (ot least acting that way for radio) that he put a 9 year old on and basically said the kid was a serial killer. They showed the kids face, and in their estimation, publicly embarassing him and dooming him to be known as “serial killer” at school. And probably helping to to encourage him along that road.
Are these the actions of a responsible doctor?
Funny - I saw the serial killer part of the show. He said that this kid had 9 of the 14 characteistics. Then he said Dahmer(sp) had 7. Then he said:
Does this mean your child will be a serial killer? No it does not. One of the biggest differences in this child’s life is that he has two involved parents who care about this kid and really want to get him on the right track.
I taped the show because I knew I would miss the beginning. I will have to watch it later to get a more exact quote.
Has anyone on this thread read Dr. Phil’s “Relationship Rescue”? In that book, we learn that gender roles are ordained by God, and woe to the man or woman who strays from their designated paths. He likes to stress that men want their wives to be a sex kitten in bed and Betty Crocker in the kitchen, and although he doesn’t go quite so far as to say women should comply if they want to keep their husbands, he comes pretty darn close. Don’t have the copy any more so I can’t provide any exact quotes, but overall it’s a darkly fascinating (and dowright depressing to liberals) book. I read it at the request of an atheist friend. I advised her to burn it rather than read it herself.
It’s encouraging if he really stressed that but what really gets the show ratings? Him parading a boy who rubs feces on the wall and tortures animals, or him saying, “troubled kids have a chance.”
I’m sure a lot of people do like the “train wreck” aspect of watching people whose lives suck. That’s why we also have Jerry Springer and Sally Jessy and Maury Povich.
I grew up with a brother who acted much like the kid in the segment - right down to the smearing feces on walls. I spent last weekend cleaning out his old room and found some frightening things. He’s now 22 and in prison trying to put his life together. 13 years ago he was just a kid no one wanted to deal with. My parents couldn’t handle him, the schools kicked him out, DSS shuffled him around a little but eventually he turned 18. If taking him on Dr Phil was an option then I would have written the letter myself.
I like his column in Oprah’s magazine. I don’t care for daytime tv in any format. It tends to dumb the viewer down to a quivering pile of wishy-washy goo, IMHO.
Personally, I think most people need to be shocked out of their negative-cyclical patterened lives and that alot of people are programmed through the baggage they inheirited and learned patterns from their parents, are not happy unless they have loads of angst and drama in their lives. They’d rather be miserable than work towards a positive solution or learn to Let It Go and Get On With Your Regularly Scheduled Life.
Anyone who appears on a talk show for help is pretty much a candidate for sterlization, in my book.
I did not watch the show but I find incredibly irresponsible of Dr. Phil and the parents to have part of this kids counseling as a TV show.
And apparently, it was necessary to hit that dad over the head with the “serial killer” brick. He did not seem to realize how serious the problem is, and seemed to feel it was a “boys will be boys” sort of phase. When the kid said it wasn’t him who smeared the feces, the Dad said something about “I’ll give the the benefit of the doubt. Thank you for cleaning it up” . Meanwhile, the mother and sisters are afraid of him.
“…Bubba, honeh, lemme ben’ ovah. Ah’d love ta have ya fill m’graw…”
Strange, I read it too. And I didn’t get that at ALL. What I got was him saying basically, be responsible for your OWN actions, and don’t blame your partner for all of the relationship’s problems. And then lining out how to help yourself so that, if possible, you could help the relationship.
The couple activities toward the end of the book were too silly for me (and I was reading it to help with a heartache anyway and didn’t HAVE a partner), but I am pretty sensitive to writers who put toom much “Godtime” in their help books, and other than him touching on his own faith here and there, and saying that if it helped the reader to rely on theirs, I got anything BUT what you say above from the book.
I just don’t get the hostility here. I mean, no, he’s not the greatest self help guy who ever lived, but what’s being attributed to him, is exactly the opposite of what he’s actually saying and advocating in his books and on his show.
He makes sure, as tanookie states, that when he DOES say something rather ominous such as “this kid has several of the atributes common to serial killers” that he says “this does NOT mean that he IS one, this is a wake up call only…etc”. But still people hear it, and ignore that part and hear it as “this kid IS a serial killer”.
As to it being irresponsible of him or the producers, ummm Hello? The people on the show are the ones that write in for help. And if they haven’t been able to afford or find help by other avenues,l to me this says how much they actually WANT help that they’re willing to go on TV to get it.
I too doubt that every single guest is helped, but what are the success rates of non televised counselors? Some ways work for some people, others may need more desparate measures.
Yeah? If Dr. Phil is so big-effin’ smart, how come he isn’t an M.D.???