Having to sign birthday/new baby/mutually agreed-upon discontinuation of employment cards never fails to chap my hide. I always sign the same thing for birthday cards: **“Happy happy happy happy happy happy birthday!” ** – a sentiment, I believe, I lifted from a Bloom County cartoon.
A cautionary tale – for the last card that went through our office, whoever originated it assumed that everyone would know who the birthday card was for and did not put the name of the birthday person on the card or envelope. After signing **“Happy happy happy happy happy happy birthday!” ** I gave it to the next available person to sign – who happened to be the intended recipient of said card. He, too, signed the card with something non-specific, because it didn’t have the birthday person’s name on it. A good laugh was had by all after he tried to hand it to the next person – and it kind of points to the inanity of the whole idea.
I remember one time I was handed a ‘retirement’ card to sign shortly after I started a job, so I wrote “I know we’ve just met, but already I feel like I’ve known you for days. Best of luck.” No idea if I caused mortal offense, but I felt it was worth the risk.
Sal Ammoniac, I just discovered what your username means, due to the ill-advised ingestion of some Dutch liquorice. What a strange thing to put in candy!
I too hate the card thing, but now I work by myself so I don’t have that problem anymore
The office I used to work in was terrible about it though. I don’t think a single week ever went by without one of those things going around.
They would send the card around with a not-so-subtle request that you also kick in some money. And also with the admonition that if you don’t pay up YOU’RE NOT ALLOWED TO SIGN OUR CARD!!!
My supervisor has added something terrible to the manila folder: a checklist of the employees who signed. There’s no passing the card along without signing. Even if you check off your name, she’ll check to make sure you really did sign.
Usually I just write some variation of what everyone else has already written … except on the card congratulating a coworker on her fourth baby. I noted that her little boy shared the name of my first car and asked whether the baby had started belching smoke yet.
Come to think of it, I haven’t been asked to sign an office card since then.
I like it. If I didn’t have such distinctive handwriting I’d try a few anonymous comments myself.
My supervisor has added something terrible to the manila folder: a checklist of the employees who signed.*
I get these too! Only with the Dreaded Legal size white envelope … you know …
the one to put money in! With the size of the place I work in, I swear you could go broke with this stupid ritual! Even putting just a buck in. I Hate HATE HATE that crap!
I was surprised this bit didn’t make it into “Office Space”
I write “Be lucky!” on all office greetings cards (except condolences cards). It frees my mind up for more important matters such as pondering what filling to put in my sandwiches for lunch.
