Instructions for Guests
Waking Up
The glasses are within reach on the table at the end of the bed, next to the alarm clock.
The alarm is set for six thirty. You can rise as late as seven, but you will have to wash instead of showering.
Getting ready
In the shower, the valve does not fully cut off the water to the tap when you select the shower. Adjust the remaining water for comfort and ignore the hot water at your feet.
Clothing is in the dresser or folded nearby. Place dirty clothes in the laundry bag on the floor.
Food is in the fridge. Feel free to eat, or even clean up.
If there are enough recyclables or garbage, take them to the bins in the parking area.
Going to Work
You have to be out the door at either twenty to eight or five to eight to catch the northbound bus to the subway. The bus will be crowded with students; get there early and you have a chance to get a seat.
On your way out, don’t forget to grab the newspaper with your apartment number on it; otherwise it will be gone when you return.
At the subway, get in the last door of the first car of the westbound train. This will position you to be closest to the exit when you get out. Go two stops to Islngton, go up the escalator, through the bus concourse to the right, and run up the last set of steps.
Line up at the top for the #82 bus. This bus will take you across the western suburbs to work. The curly-haired man who greets you is a co-worker. You can talk to him; he’s okay. If you’re lucky, you may get to talk to the French woman or the redhead—but don’t count on it.
Get on the bus when it arrives. It will travel along some streets, then get on the freeway. Get out at the first stop after it leaves the freeway. Walk to work. The autopilot knows the way.
Work
Don’t worry that you have to know what’s in the 2000 pages of printed stuff about the software system you’re documenting. You have read them; you simply don’t need 99.9% of it at any given time. (Guessing the necessary 0.1% is left as an exercise for the reader.)
Going Home
Walk to the other bus stop to catch the bus going home. If it’s not muddy, you can cross the lawn. When you get to the subway station, go to the eastbound train.
*If it’s Wednesday, you will need $40.00 to buy next week’s bus pass. Go to the money machine before entering the subway station. There are no money machines inside, and the pass sellers do not take debit cards. The best place to buy the pass is at the Mississauga Transit booth in the bus concourse: fewer crowds.
*If it’s Monday, you have to go downtown to meet friends at the Esperanto club. Most Mondays they are at the cafe; check the schedule in your organizer for other locations. Don’t worry about speaking the language; the translator module should take care of it.
Take the subway back to the station you got on at.
When you get back to the apartment building, get the mail from the box. Place any items addressed to previous tenants on the shelf above the mailboxes.
Unlock the front door, go dowstairs, and go back to the apartment. Unlock, go in, drop your stuff, sit down on the couch-bed, and relax. Check the phone for messages. Eat. Put some music on. (Yes, the “stereo” is a lash-up of miscellaneous equipment, including the PC for MP3s, but it mostly works. Although the MD deck doesn’t record.)
Relax and fall asleep…
We now return you to your regularly-scheduled programming.
