Twice in recent weeks, I’ve been in public restrooms and have noticed other guys leaning forward, with one hand against the wall, as they stand at urinals and relieve themselves. The guys weren’t moaning with delight or obviously intoxicated. I’m a bit of a germophobe and wouldn’t touch a wall in a public restroom if I could possibly avoid it.
Doper dudes, do you do this? If so, is your relief at peeing so overwhelming that you just have to brace yourself, lest you fall over with giddy delight? Or does it have something to do with the force with which your urine stream jets out of your body?
At uni, we had a lecturer with pretty serious OCD. He was something of a figure of fun, because (among other reasons) he was in the army reserve and would turn up to lecture in uniform completely unnecessarily.
He used to have a urination routine that was hilarious. Everyone got to know it. He would stand at exactly the same spot at the trough every visit, putting his hand on the wall. Finish with exactly three firm shakes. Go to the same sink. Splash water over his head. Then call himself to attention in the mirror by name and rank (“Captain <Lecturer>, atten…shun!”), salute himself, and then leave.
Students eventually traced in marker pen a hand outline on the wall where he always put his hand, and labelled it the “<Lecturer> Memorial Tile”.
It’s a mystery to me too. My dad used to do it, and I had no idea why.
My only guess is that if you pee through the zipper and the underwear hole, your hand is holding them apart so the zipper teeth don’t bite into your dainties. Leaning would then get your stream at the right angle without needing to hold it.
I don’t lean against the wall, but if I lay one hand on the plumbing fixture of the urinal (you know, that big chrome thing with the nut on top?), it relaxes me and begins the flow. Due to BPH, I have a very slow flow anyway.
Not meaning to mini-hijack, but no matter how badly I need to pee, if some guy is standing next to me, fuggetaboutit. I can’t go. Probably not even at gunpoint. Don’t know why that is, so I’d appreciate it, if there’s a whole line of available urinals, don’t pick the one next to me, please.
It’s possible they were sailors. It takes three legs to make a tripod, or to make a table stand, or to piss on a boat without making a mess. In really rough seas, I’d lean forward and rest my forehead against the bulkhead.
I was in a club in Ljuljana, Slovenia back in the early 90’s when I saw the most ingenious thing… an upholstered oval-shaped pad directly over the urinal, where one could rest one’s forehead while taking care of business.
Upon pondering the matter, it occurs to me that I’ve never seen a short stocky guy do this, it seems to be more a habit of tall lanky dudes. It certainly does change the angle a bit, which would be more important for a tall guy, but I think it’s mosty for the 3-point stability. A short guy can plant himself in a wide-legged stance and get sufficient 2-point stability, but if a tall long-legged fellow does this he’s edging over into the territory of the guy at the next urinal.
When this subject came up, I immediately thought of my late father-in-law who was a chronic hand-on-the-wall type (not that I was particularly into watching him pee, you understand, but I travelled with him a lot and stood beside him at countless rest-stop urinals). He was one of these laid-back types that could never walk a straight line or stand at attention. He ambled when he walked, rambled when he talked and usually found something to lean against when he stood. If he had to free-stand, he shuffled and swayed…nothing wrong with him, just his nature. But when answering a call of nature, he definitely needed that third stability point. If he hadn’t had it, it would not have been safe to stand next to him…the stream would have gone everywhere!
SS
I’m short and stocky, and I do it from time to time.
It’s probably because I’m lazy. When I’m drunk, I do it so I don’t fall over. When I’m really drunk, I rest my forehead on the wall, because the cool ceramic wakes me up
You know what I meant…