I’m NOT talking about the sickos that leave urine and feces on the seat or floor, leave a half-eaten sandwich on the toilet paper dispenser or commit other abhorrent acts that should be punishable by death. You people would never reveal yourselves anyway. I’m talking about actions that are just odd or weird. Anyway, these are my observances primarily in the men’s rooms of office buildings in which I’ve worked. If you do any of these, please feel free to explain why.
Spitting into the urinal or toilet first, before relieving oneself. This is extremely common. I assumed it’s a “marking of territory” carryover from our cave-dwelling days.
Grabbing a small piece of paper towel before using the urinal. This is not very common, but I have observed it a few times. While I don’t look, it does seem that man holds his penis with the paper towel. Does he think his hand is dirty (to keep his penis clean), his penis is dirty (to keep his hand clean), or something else?
One hand on the wall above the urinal while urinating. Is the guy afraid to lose his balance?
Please add yours to the list, and please explain yourself if you do any of these things.
Flushing constantly while peeing into the urinal. While there is a debate on small vs environment on flushing after, and it’s only a little crazy to flush before if it’s yellow already, flushing a dozen times during is just bat-shit crazy. And thus ought to make Smokey The Bear stop wiping his ass with charmin, come out of the stall and whap you with a shovel in the back of the head. A dozen times.
My dad does #3. How do I know this? Because there’s a dirty spot on the wall above his toilet. Ew.
And I hadn’t run into this before I started my current job, but the other women here have a thing for Lysol aerosol spray. Copious amounts of Lysol spray. Like, I walk into a stall and choke on it amounts. As far as I can tell, they’re not using it to disinfect the toilet seat. We have ass gaskets for that. Instead, they’re spraying it to mask the smell of their business.
You know, I’d rather smell the shit than that crap. After all, it doesn’t make the little airborne shit molecules disappear. It doesn’t kill the germs on the airborne shit molecules, because they’re molecules. Germs are bigger than molecules. All it does is add change the smell from plain old shit to rotting floral essence of shit. It also makes my asthma kick in, which shit doesn’t do.
I started hiding the cans behind the toilet. Took 'em a while to figure out what I was doing.
Every now and then I will see large pieces of paper towel on the toilet seat at work. I guess I can understand a germophobe not wanting to get his butt germy, but I hate that I have to clean up after him.
And someone keeps pouring some strange black liquid down the sink, but it usually gets all over the sink. I’m always afraid that my tie is going to touch it and get stained.
I’ve seen guys flush the urinal before peeing in it. What’s the point of that. Also, in the days before smoking got banned just about everywhere, people would leave their cigarette butts in the urinal.
I’m sure I have spit into a urinal. It isn’t a regular thing, but if someone has to spit, it’s much better he do it there than in the sink or on the floor, I’d think.
Maybe, if he’s older. Some people when older have difficulty maintaining balance when standing still, and if you start to lose your balance, it wouldn’t be a good idea to step back to recover now would it?
There’s the well known rules that men intuitively pick up about which urinal to use depending on where other men are standing. It’s very common, but still a little odd.
I have never noticed anyone grabbing a paper towel to hold his penis! :eek:
Not really a habit as such, but I have been into several bars/restaurants where they dump a large pile of beverage ice into the urinal – I guess so you do not have to flush?
I have heard it said that Lysol and similar aerosol products cause a more rapid decline in smell receptor acuity, so things start to smell clean because you lose the ability to actually smell things. Not sure if there is any truth to that.
In the bathroom at my office, we have two urinals and three toilets. Needing to urinate, I walked in and noticed there were people at both urinals and another guy was standing at the side. None of the toilets were in use, so I walked past him and used one.
As I’m leaving, I noticed that the guy who was standing to the side earlier is now using the urinal. Apparently, he was waiting for one of the urinals to be free instead of using the toilet.
I thought that was weird. But maybe I’m weird for not waiting. Is it more poilite to leave toilets available for those whose needs can’t be met by urinals?
Took me a second to figure out how someone does number three. :dubious:
Oh, my stars, the women at my old office were terrible about that. They’d spray the seat and then put down the gasket over the Lysol-sprayed seat. Half the time the’d flush before sitting down, because their pee-pee is so snowflakey speshul that it can only be released into clean drinking water.
Old coffee?
See above - IME women are ten thousand times worse about this.
I used to try to mask or reduce my noises. Now I let 'er rip!
Yeah. Some of us have to relax a LOT before we can whiz in the urinal, and I for one would rather lean forward and hold myself up than risk stumbling backward at the wrong moment.
At my office, we have the wannabe germaphobe surgeons who either butt into the inward swinging door to enter without touching the door, or they use the handicap opener. Then, before they wash their hands, they run out a chunk of paper towels so they don’t have to touch the faucet, and finally, they use the door opener to leave.
Joke’s on them. I’ve lost count of the number of times I’ve seen people do their business, walk right past the sink and hit the opener button with their filthy hands.
Sometimes when I’m going past the restrooms I think to myself that I sort of, maybe have to pee and it makes more sense to go in and see if I can go now rather than walk all the way back to my work area and then have to come back. So I go to the urinal and stand there and I know I’m going to pee but it’s just not quite there yet. At such a time a flush with it’s rush of running water will trigger my brain’s urination circuit and I immediately start to go.
I’d bet that’s a pretty common reason for the pre-flush.
I’ve heard people moaning and groaning* in the stall as well as singing and talking/muttering to themselves and talking on the phone while in the stall. All weird behaviours to me.
*Not in a way that makes me think they are having a medical emergency. More like they want to make sure that others know they are in there.
Cigarettes in the toilet are fun though. That’s target practice.
So ladies, if your getting frustrated because your man can’t seem to hit the toilet to save his life, you can thank these holier than thou non smokers that worked so hard to get cigarettes banned. Now we no longer get any target practice in, honing our skills.
SEE THE HAVOC YOU GUYS HAVE CAUSED? OH THE HUMANITY! Spitting in the urinal: I spit because I have an extremely sensitive gag reflex. If I walk into a bathroom that smells less than fantastic, I need to spit or else I’m going to puke.
At my office there’s always water all over the place around the sinks. I have no idea what the hell happened - the faucets don’t leak or anything. My guess is that people are using the sink like a goddamn birdbath.
