Tomorrow (Tuesday) night…
There’s a session tomorrow night? :eek: No one told me about this!
I’ll be there if that’s what we want to do. I’d just prefer to play again on Saturday.
Yeah I can’t do tuesday. Saturday does work.
Saturday it is then. Hopefully we can have a nice long session. I’d like to at least get through the second level of the dungeon (and lvl myself up in the process). Then, at least, I can control some bitches I Rebuke.
Hey guys, 50% chance I might he a little late tonight. Less than 30 minutes though.
Well, since our DM is a college kid who is probably out having sex with college girls, I will take over this installment.
Session Three: Zombie Nonpocalypse
Last session ended with our party having gotten past the kobold village and being given Meep, a kobold of low rank who’s serving as our guide to the drow-infested dungeon we now find ourselves in. Meep’s meek, cringing, pathetic demeanor endeared him to the party’s necromancer, Vrai, who decided that instead of murdering Meep, we will instead keep him alive. Vrai has also called dibs on Meep and has said that Meep will be his “Igor” once they get out of the dungeon.
Along the way down into the dungeon the party found a strange glowing sphere floating in the air, and almost a dozen derro/kobold corpses scattered around the room. Through judicious use of Spellcraft and a Detect Magic spell, Vrai realized that the sphere contained some sort of mid-level necromantic magic. His greed overcoming his better instincts, he decided to go up to the sphere and check it out. I mean, free necromantic magic item, right?
When the DM asked where Vrai was moving to, I should have taken that as a clue. I didn’t. Instead, I moved Vrai right up to the sphere. In the middle of all the corpses. Yes… even as I did so I was thinking “I should really type ‘Vrai advances slowly in case any of the zombies start moving’” I didn’t type that.
Roughly 30 feet away from the rest of the party, surrounded by corpses with the baleful necromantic magical item in front of him, Vrai was suddenly surrounded by 11 zombies. And I do mean surrounded, every square was filled with a zombie hungry for elf flesh. But Vrai’s a dexterous little bastard, and only one zombie managed to land a hit (although with Vrai’s total of 4 mighty hit points, a small hit was still not a good thing). Luckily enough, however, Vrai rolled very well for initiative and then for Rebuking. The first round saw Vrai getting the drop on the whole hoard of zombies and the rest of the party, and a successful Rebuke attempt that left the 6 zombies nearest to him cowering in his presence. The next round did for the other 5 zombies, and the rest of the work was cleanup at that point. The party’s [del]plot hook[/del] NPC companion, Fran (totally a girl’s name but he’s a dude) also began growing increasingly suspicious of Vrai due to both Vrai’s ability to Rebuke undead as well as the fact that Vrai claimed possession of the glowing sphere of necromantic something-or-other.
At this point our mighty 1st level party leveled up. Given the ability to roll up new character levels then and there, our casters decided that it would be a good time to take an 8 hour nap and replenish their arcane (and divine) might and take advantage of their new spell slots. After some grumbling, esecially due to the fact that the human noble we’re there to rescue only had roughly 22 hours left to live before she was sacrificed at the full moon, Fran stood guard while the angsty emo drow (or dremo for short) grumpily scouted ahead. Along the way he proved that he can be defeated by not only rats, but also loose gravel, as he kicked a pile of pebbles down a massive spiral staircase and thereby alerted anything down there that a party of adventurers would soon be stopping by and could be eaten, if so desired.
Luckily however the only things closest to the stairs turned out to be a pack of zombies, who didn’t have the wherewithal to raise any alarms. Bolstered by his successes with the sphere-horde earlier, Vrai bravely stepped forward and told the party that he’d take care of the pesky buggers. He then rolled too low to be able to turn any of the zombies at all. A short bit of combat followed, with Fran taking a minor wound and the dremo also taking a bit of a bite. Neither were healed up (i don’t think) by the end, as we’re saving our spell casting for when we face the drow in their lair.
After dispatching the handfull of zombies the party had the choice to move west by taking down a wooden barricade, or move north into a hallway which was blocked by a set of spears which had been wedged into the room in order to block the zombies’ progress (we think). As the dremo pointed out that he’d heard someone talking to the north, we figured that we might as well scout up north in order to find out who’s lurking there, and because the rest of the party seems to think that the captive noble woman is to the north. (I maintain that there was something awesome to the west that we missed, quite possibly bacon).
Right before we ended, we had a chance to do some looting and we found that the path to the north was a hallway through a deserted derro barracks, at which point Vrai reminded Fran of the deal they’d struck when Fran first hired Vrai and the dremo; all loot found in the dungeon is to be split between Vrai and the dremo (since Vrai and the dremo were traveling together and had not yet met the third PC, Khel the druid, Khel was not included in this deal). Fran was not happy, but this agreed. That may however not be much of an issue anyways as he drew his sword at the dremo over a perceived insult (well, actual insult, perceived threat) and Vrai would like to murder him in any case. Odds of the NPC making it out of the dungeon alive are slim.
That was the point we ended at, and I still say that we’re missing out on a fantastic treasure trove of bacon in the western passage.
College “Kid”? “Probably” out having sex with college girl? I’m sensing a lot of passive-aggressive terminology in this sentence. -1 DM Brownie Point! But you did write up the session, so that’s +2 Brownie Points, I suppose. So you end up with one Brownie Point. Congrats!
Finn did a pretty good job of summing up the session. I’ll add that when he got surrounded by zombies, the other party members promptly decided that he was dead and started discussing what he should reroll as. Also, the noble Sir Mule (And much of the supplies) are outside the cave. No, they do not simply disappear when not needed like a Wizard’s familiar. That would be unrealistic.
The last thing Finn didn’t describe is the downstairs area. There’s a huge, square stone room, with four passages leading out in each of the cardinal directions. The Northern passage is blocked with spears; the Southern and Eastern passages are caved in; and the Eastern passage is barricaded with thick wood. Oh, and the zombies weren’t Derro, who are to Gnomes what Drow are to Elves, they are Duergar, who have the same relationship to Dwarves.
You are a college kid. I’ve told you that before, you’re a young’un and will be until you hit roughly 23 years old. And hell, most of the developed world wants to have sex with 18 year old girls away from home for the first time, I don’t think it’s an insult.
Also, in my defense, I will note that Dero are the evil dwarves who live in the hollow Earth. I had them confused with the Duergar, who are stars of a reality TV show and have lots of kids.
When we left off, our heroes had easily dispatched of some undead. By “Easily” I mean that Vrai failed to Rebuke them, which made the fight much more dangerous. After licking their wounds, they prepared to head into the room blocked off by all the spears, where the voices were coming from. It was dark, and only Khel and Fran were carrying torches. Vrai suggested that Fran enter the room first, since he was a disposable NPC. I mean, since he had a torch. Fran entered the room and was promptly sneak attacked by two Duergar. He fell to the ground and started bleeding out, and the torch was extinguished.
Hoping to save Fran, Khel ran in with the torch. The room beyond lit up, showing seven Duergar. Of course, running in between two rogues was not a good idea, and they proceeded to stab Khel for nineteen points of damage; Khel was left with a single hit point. Moonclaw came to his rescue, but missed; Vrai tried to pump one of the rogues full of negative energy, but missed. Things were looking bad; if Khel tried to move or heal, he’d become the creamy filling of a Sneak Attack Oreo, which would likely promptly lead to his death. Phaistos skewered one of the dwarves, but Khel was still in bad shape. That’s when rescue came from an unlikely source: Meep tumbled past the dwarves and stuck his spear through the dwarf’s throat. That’s when the party found out that Meep was a Rogue, which had been hinted at earlier.
Fran kept bleeding out on the floor. While Khel considered the best way to save him without using the valuable spells he’d need to fix himself up, Phaistos proceeded to grab Fran’s head, pull it back, and slit his throat. He then proceeded to intimidate the remaining Duregar to surrender. They then began speaking in Undercommon, and the Duregar leader asks the party to clear out a spider infestation in a nearby tunnel in exchange for information regarding the Drow’s location. The party agrees, and goes after the spiders. Right after Vrai and Phaistos loot Fran’s body, of course.
When they get to the tunnel, our heroes decide to heroically send the kobold in first. Predictably, this doesn’t work very well, and Meep starts screaming after a few moments. The party rushes in, to find Meep covered in webs with a giant, horse-sized spider standing over him. Phaistos tumbles past the spider, leaping off a rock and flipping over to land on his feet behind it. Then he stabs the spider. Meanwhile, Vrai and Khel charge the spider, Khel because it’s the right thing to do and Vrai because (Although he denies it) he seems to like Meep. The spider whirls around and bites Vrai, knocking him out with a single hit and poisoning him. (Vrai has 6 Constitution, and 6 hit points.) The others hurriedly beat on the spider until finally, with a glorious sneak attack, Phaistos kills it.
After failing to heal Vrai, who stabilizes all by himself, and looting the past victims of the spider, the party sends Phaistos to get an antidote for Vrai from the dwarves. When he does this, they tell him of an armory guarded by a blade, built by the original dwarven owners of this fortress. The party manages to evade the trap and loot the armory, finding masterwork weapons for everyone and a mithral suit of chainmail, which Vrai and Phaistos flip a coin for. Vrai wins, and so becomes a little less squishy. The party levels up to level three, and all but Vrai break twenty hit points. (Vrai is still at 7). Both Phaistos and Khel are heavily wounded, however, at 19 and 16 hit points respectively, and both casters are very low on spells. However, the path to the Drow is still long; the Duregar told them that they must pass a burrow of ratmen, climb down to the ancient mines, and get past the Temple of Jubilex, where the Drow is holding the girl. With only nine and a half hours to go before midnight, the party can’t afford to rest for eight hours; but can they afford to face the Drow without all of their spells or hit points?
Will our heroes reach the Temple of Jubilex? Will they defeat the Drow? And will they do all this in time to stop the girl from being sacrificed? Find out next time, on… Dungeons and Dopers!!!
Hey everyone, I hope you’re enjoying the epic tales of the tomfoolery of FinnAgain, Love Rhombus, and D_Odds. At least, I hope some of you are enjoying the tale… I mean, not many comments, right? 
Ah well, I enjoy writing them, so you BETTER enjoy reading them!
Simply for the record, Vrai is perfectly willing to let the human female die and just loot the hell out of the dungeon. After all, the reward is only 1333 gold for him if the woman lives.
I’m certainly enjoying reading them… having started today and catching up.
If these games are all done online, and you ever need an extra Player character here or there to show up or for some small time interactions, feel free to let me know!
I always enjoy reading stuff like this
Glad you’re enjoying this! That’s what I’m here for.
Well, the players will not shut up about how they need a fourth player who can take more than two hits, so if you’re down to join the party, we always have room. If not, and you just want to pop in now and then, it could certainly be fun to have fellow dopers pop in to take control of NPCs, like Meep or Fran. Yeah, this happens online, over Skype.
We really could use a fourth, preferably someone who wants to play a full plated cleric. A fifth to play a wizard would be good… but someone to pop in every now and again would be okay. Not sure how viable Meep will be for long term play though, since I’ve called dibs on him as my Igor and I’m totally going to kill, Raise and Awaken him in the future.
Meeps: “Does Meeps have a say in this?”
Vrai: “NO!”
Damn I totally could have played today, but stayed up late and overslept for little reason.
Next time…next time… mwahahaha.
Awesome, you can be Keep for a day!
That is an unacceptable outcome, moderator FinnAgain. :dubious:
Watch out, he might ban you! 
Okay okay. I will not Profane Lifeleech the fuckers within 30 feet of her either. We will, however, sweep through the dungeon on the way out and slaughter all of the critters we missed. The dwarves and kobolds are all meat.