The other day I ate a lot of sushi, and then during work, I was doing a presentation, coughed, and sharted. What I would like to know:
- What causes them?
- How do you prevent them?
- What are they made of?
I was unfamiliar with the word shart so I googled it. I wish I hadn’t.
Our intestinal flora says “seaweed? Our ancestors come from a cow’s udder in Bavaria; we don’t know from seaweed. Hey, for all we know, you just ate poison: we’re not wasting any time breaking it down and seperating liquids from solids. We better err on the side of caution and just expel it right away.”
I think you know.
Does Chipotlaway get sushi stains out of your shorts, too?
I dunno, mine seem made of mucous.
I’ll test the seaweed theory, thanks. 
1. What causes them?
The anus normally can distinguish between vapor under pressure and solid/liquid under pressure. Sometimes it gets fooled; sometimes the distinguishing mechanism gets compromised.
2. How do you prevent them?
Be aware of foods that tend to lead to them, and don’t eat those foods.
3. What are they made of?
They’re typically a confluence of vapor, liquid, and solid.
The rectum has a layer of mucosal tissue (for lubrication, I guess), and some conditions trigger overproduction - the aftermath of a rectal prolapse is one, and digestive irritation is another. If you have a pile of rectal mucus and gas, you can get mucus sharts. Really unpleasant. I had several teenage years where I just didn’t dare fart at all, due to rectal mucus problems.
Si
Me too, but all I found was this.
si_blakely, been there, done that, eventually had surgery.
It’s bad enough contemplating having to use the public high school restroom, nevermind having anal mucuous associated with every go. Also, having to line your undershorts every time with layers of TP just in case you didn’t make it in time. (Too ashamed to consider if there were alternatives.)