A girlfriend of mine was extolling the virtues of ‘colon-irragation’ the other day and prattling off the names of famous people who got them regularly believing in their health promoting properties. I was only half listening until she named Princess Di (so claims people magazine, she says). That got me thinking, if true, how would the royal family go about finding someone to perform this…delicate…procedure? I realise she was just a person when you got right down to it, but still, it almost seems sacriligious to stick anything up her royal Tushness.
I just re-read my post and it came off more flip than I intended. Apologies to anyone offended. But my question remains…
She could’ve done it herself. But then, how would anyone know. Maybe she bragged about it.
Maybe…but she (my girlfriend) says she had it done. I can understand the Family doc doing check ups on The Queen and such. But this seems to fall into a more esoteric catagory.
They are done routinely in doctor’s offices everyday for people who are going to have their colons examined… so I don’t think getting one done is all that difficult.
Of course you can probably hire a practioner to come to your house and give you one too… which is more likely the case for someone famous.
I was listening to Loveline (radio show about health… or something like that) and someone called in and asked this. They said that, I think it was, both Janet Jackson and Vanna White recommended coffee enemas. (I swear to GOD, I am not making this up!) And was this safe, was it a good idea, did it do anything, etc…
Anyway, the professional opinion of Dr. Drew, who is a real MD, was that it was weird, and that if you needed an colonic irrigation, your doctor would tell you. If not, it’s not really doing anything.
My first thought was “COFFEE? Well, I think you can absorb caffeine through the lining of your intestines, just like you can through your stomach, so you might get a caffeine buzz from it. I guess.”
But aside from that, my thoughts pretty much boiled down to… this is a sexual thing. Really. At least somewhat. It’s like, a humilation thing. And that’s why some people seem to like it. That’s a terribly, terribly armchair analysis, and I am by no means qualified to deliver it, but that was what my gut reaction was.
Anyway, that’s my $.02
-Ben
Yeah, I heard that Loveline too, it was just a couple days ago.
I’ve heard of the coffee (and other fluids such as alcohol and magic herbal remidies) being used, all extolling the virtues of “cleansing” and “removing toxins”.
Dr. Drew hit the nail on the head in his reply IMHO. He said that its all psychological, not particularly harmful (unless you use Vodka or something stupid), but it has no real medicinal benefits whasoever. Any improvements one feels are due to the placebo effect. He went on to make the point that people frequently come in for colonoscopies and similar procedures prior to which the doctors really clean out that colon well, much more so than any casual enema treatment. None of these people ever claim to feel better, or more energized following these treatments. That makes alot of sense in my book. He also stated that none of these “treatments” ever give a chemical compound or name to the “toxins” one removes, so scientists have convienently not been able to test the validity of any of it. Fact is, the colon was designed to do what it does, and it has been doing it wonderfully for millions and millions of years, a splash of soapy water or coffee ain’t going to make it better.
Its all bogus IMHO. Most likely the entire practice is a combination of a snake oil, and a sexual device both physically and psychologically.
Cecil Adams on colonics.
As to the OP, I have confidence that folks with the resources of the royal family have all manner of ways of discreetly obtaining products and services.
What exactly does it DO? Does it make you poop alot, or does it just run right back out?
BTW, what’s a berium enema?
(Actually, at Kmart, when someone buys and enema kit, I have to supress a giggle at the illustration on the back, for directions…it just looks so funny…it’s a figure bending over…)
A barium enema is given in conjunction with an exam of the intestines. Actually, the person cleanses his intestines first with the recommended solution, and barium is given in the examining room. By virtue of the barium, the physician is able to see the intestines through a scope and it can be x-rayed also, to detect diverticulosis or any other abnormalities.
I have a wonderful book from the late 19th century that claims all maladies (smallpox, diptheria, anemia, headaches, sore throat, etc.) are caused by the failure to regularly cleanse the colon. The author claims he cured his own tuberculosis with this method. He recommends working up to taking a gallon of water rectally several nights per week. Depending on your condition, you should include additives to the “injections”: herbs, oatmeal, etc.
His grasp of physiology is poor so I wouldn’t trust him, but it’s interesting to note that this is not a brand-new idea. It’s just been sleeping during the time when real science found medical treatments that actually work.
Enemas are helpful for constipation, but it’s highly unlikely that any medical miracles will result.
You can obtain an enema bucket from a medical supply store or rig up your own: it’s basically a pail with a tube connected to the bottom of the side and a clamp so you can control the speed of the flow. It works by gravity: lay on your side (the left, because of the direction of the sigmoid flexure), insert tube, and open the clamp. You may choose to have a friend (ahem) assist you. The higher you hold the bucket, the faster the water (or whatever) flows, naturally.
When choosing the liquid you’ll use, keep in mind that anything you put in your colon has a pretty direct route to your circulatory system. This is how suppositories work. In other words, injecting a gallon of Vodka into your rectum would probably make you drunk off your ***, quite literally.
Rub your tummy in a clockwise direction (to loosen the crud from the walls of your colon) while lying on your back and hold the fluid in for as long as you can. The discharge will be a watery stream along with the contents of your bowels. Make sure you’re near the bathroom.
Sounds romantic. I hope you and your friend have a good time with this.
I certainly hope that it is not hot coffee! :eek:
Dr. Nicholas Gonzalez was a proponent of coffee enemas as a means to treat cancer. See this link for more information.
My own uncle, diagnosed with colon cancer, died within a few years of diagnosis because he preferred to rely on coffee enemas when conventional treatment could have cured his cancer and saved his life.
Michael Landon also relied on coffee enemas, and while I don’t know the details of his treatment (if any), the coffee enemas didn’t help.
Robin
If you want to know what the colonic hydrotherapists have to say for themselves.
A doctor in a small town was treating this guy but nothing seemed help his condition. The doctor told him he had tried every procedure but nothing seemed to work. The guy told the doctor, “Surely there must be something that you haven’t tried.”
The doctor replied there was indeed something he hadn’t tried but it is pretty far out, although some oldtimers swear by it - a coffee enema.
The guy replied, “Doc I’m desperate, I’ll try anything - go for it.”
The Doctor brews up a pot of coffee, gets a bag and hose and starts to give him the enema. All of a sudden the guy yells, “Oooooh, ooooh!”.
The doctor asks, “What the matter, too hot?”.
The guy replies, “No, too sweet!”.
Hi all,
Seems like every generation has butt freaks that swear by enemas.
I’ve read that old man Kellog of cereal fame was a enema freak.
What the hell, everyone needs a hobby.
Sounds like a lot of crap to me.
ravi…