Enterprise: The Breach (spoilers after US airing)

[Ephemera]

tracer: Comment, comment, respond to highjack, comment, phaser cutting phasers, run to buy TOS episode to dis/prove random comment, highjack.

Wearia: Fake spoilers, something 'bout Canada, more spoilers about Hoshi and T’Pol decon scene, highjack, highjack, Tars teasing.

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Oh, and tracer can have two points for his awesome use of spoilers. So now it’s a three way tie for first with NCB in the end. Like always.
Speaking of which, you forgot to mention mine and NCB’s constant sniping at each other, viva. For shame.

[Tars_Tarkas]

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**** *** *** ** ****** **** ***** ***** ** * ***** **** ***** **** ******* *** ****** * ****** *** ***** *** *** * *** ***** ******** ** **** ***** *** **** ******* ******* ****** ****** ***** with a cherry on top!

[Kn_ckers]

Guys, I’m sorry. I’m really too tired to read all the previous posts right now, but I wanted to toss in my comments about this ep. So what I’m going to do is say a lot of crap everybody else probably all said, and then read the other posts, and THEN feel stupid.

My goal is to confuse and obfuscate. Here goes…
(spoilers a-plenty)

I liked it. I like Phlox. He’s funny and interesting, and though there is something Neelix-esque about his role (funny looking alien/comic relief), I like him 9,000 times better than I ever liked Neelix on my most forgiving day. Phlox, you see, has a personality, a sense of humor, and some small measure of common sense. He also has some really rocking critters. Loved that Tribble. And I can overlook the lack of continuity, 'cause it’s not like he had a Starfleet exobiologist watching over his shoulder taking notes. For all we know, Hoshi was the only pre-TOS Starfleeter to see a Tribble, and she took its memory of to her grave.

I liked the rock-climbing, and here’s why (besides the slashy three-sweaty-men-in-spandex thing):
It was funny. It made me laugh. Laugh, and laugh and laugh. The falling scene was just absolutely goofy and confusing. I couldn’t figure out what the hell was going on - why or how they were falling - it was just incredibly funny to see them all sliding down the shoot thing and screaming and flapping their arms in mortal terror.
Clearly, I am evil.

This episode was not without its downside, though: Too preachy. Granted, it was a million times less preachy than the HIV/AIDS one (can’t remember the title), but there was a pretentious, holier-than-thou attitude to this episode that I found grating. Grating on my nerves, I mean, not, like, cheese-grating, or something…
Yeah, prejudice is bad. No shit, Watson.

And the whole two people helping their species overcome centuries of mutual hatred was a little farfetched. I guess one could look as it as the two cultures being pretty much ready to get over it, anyhow, but they made it look as though Phlox and Whatshisface were the catalysts in forging a new era of tolerance. Which I cannot believe would actually HAPPEN. But then, I am a cynic and a pessimist. So I could be wrong. I damn well hope so.

So that’s me for now. Overall, good… B+, Maybe even A-. Much, much than the start of this season. Looking forward to my dose of panda next week.
And hey, while I’m here - can I have a hug? Please? I’ve had a really lousy week - work has just been chewing me up and spitting me out, and I’m all covered with metaphorical saliva… Ew, that was gross.

I also want pie, if there is any around.
Love, Kn*ckers

[Kn_ckers]

Ah. Now that I HAVE read the previous posts, I have to ass – no, I meant ADD, but I like the typo too much to delete – a few things:

Very honored by the recognition of asterisks, and the important contribution they have made to our society. May I suggest wider sweeping gestures to honor this very important element of punctuation? Such as renaming famous places/persons/etc. as follows:

Frak Sntr
Frnce
WlMart
Clvelnd, *h
Jen Cretin
Jpiter
The Msssspp* River

Thank you for your interest in asterisks. Donations to this very worthy cause can be made out to Kn*ckers, personal check or cash only, please.

[Cervaise]

Wow, where the hell did this thread come from? How did I not see it? Don’t answer that, apparently I have a blood clot in my forebrain.

For the sake of completeness (since this seems to be the “serious” thread), here’s what I said in the other one. If you’ve already read that thread, you’ve seen this; it’s unchanged. I’m just being anal-retentive and stupid. Isn’t it charming?

Originally posted by me, apparently in the wrong goddam thread because I’m a frickin’ moron
As before, not horrifyingly eye-gougingly awful, but not very damn exciting, either. Totally predictable: Here’s where they explain the centuries of hatred. Here’s the scene where they try to get past it and fail. Here’s the scene where Phlox opens up to a crewmember and comes to a realization. Here’s the scene where he goes back to his patient and offers a soul-searing confession. Here’s the scene where said patient demonstrates he’s willing to abandon centuries of indoctrination after a few kind words. And we wrap up with the scene where it’s implied that, as a result of the courageous acts displayed in the central pas de deux, maybe things are going to change.

Yawn.

If the show had any balls, the story would have gone like this:

Set up the ancient hatred the same way, but make the Denobulans some seriously violent mothergrabbers. “Yes, Captain, it’s true — we sterilized one of their planets. Billions died. They surrendered, of course, and we haven’t had open hostilities since then. My people were horrified at what we’d done, but only among ourselves: We never apologized or made amends. Publicly, we were merely the victors. No wonder they still hate us.”

Develop the middle section the same way. Phlox doesn’t like his people’s history, tried to raise his children differently, and so on. He insists to the Antaran that the procedure will work (“you have eight chances in ten for a full recovery”), etc., etc., like in the existing show.

As in the show, the Antaran is affected by Phlox’s sincerity. But rather than just accepting outright, he tells Phlox: “Ask me my name.” (Didja notice that the alien dude was never named? He was always “the Antaran.” The show’s website says his name was “Hudak,” but I’ll be damned if they ever said it out loud. Sort of defeats the point of the show if they never bother to individualize the guy they’re trying to individualize, huh? Anyway…) So Phlox does, and the guy agrees.

And then he dies.

That’s right, that’s what I said. The guy agrees to the procedure, Phlox goes ahead, but because of the separation there are complexities to Antaran physiology that Phlox can’t cope with, and the “eight chances in ten” don’t work out. The patient dies on the table, never having regained consciousness.

Phlox, of course, is devastated. He cannot be comforted by Archer’s efforts: “At least you tried. You did your best. That counts for something.” Even T’Boobs cannot touch him with logic: “He was going to die anyway.”

And then Phlox writes the letter to his wayward son, except now he has some real emotional context for it.

But no, we had to have the wishy-washy, feel-good ending, where everybody goes away all misty-eyed, but not having to pay any serious consequences for their decisions. This can be said for the B plot, also, where lives are supposedly risked but the outcome is never in doubt.

Berman & Braga keep saying they want to go back to classic-era Trek, where Kirk would happily shoot first if he thought it was warranted. But they’ve misunderstood the very nature of that show. Kirk wasn’t a loose cannon: He was tough. The shows were tough. If Berman & Braga were doing “City on the Edge of Forever” today, they’d work it so the Joan Collins character would survive. And that just ain’t right.

I keep saying this: Enterprise needs to go after its characters’ emotional health and their comfortable assumptions. Nobody’s learning anything. Nobody’s changing. Nobody’s being challenged, and nobody’s paying for bad decisions. The show needs to grow some goddamn balls or it’s just going to be the same boring morality play week after week. They had a good hint of this at the beginning, when Phlox casually and unexpectedly fed the cute-n-fuzzy tribble to the reptile. Now they need to do that with the whole show instead of just a throwaway moment.

Pardon me, now, while I slink away in shame.

[tracer]

Originally posted by Knckers *
Phlox, you see, has a personality, a sense of humor, and some small measure of common sense.

Not to mention ridges on his face that look like the Deep Space Nine space station.

[Ephemera]

I don’t have any pie but any girl wanting a hug can get one while I’m around. (((((Knckers)))))

*If you knew how much I hate doing internet hugs, you’d be even more honored by my doing that.

[AncientHumanoid]

Poor Kn*ckers.

Here’s a hug and an ass grope while I nibble on the back of your neck.

hope you aren’t wearing any pants

[Ephemera]

Uh… that was cplant, not Kn*ckers. And no, he wasn’t wearing any pants.

[AncientHumanoid]

;j

[tracer]

(He wasn’t wearing any Orthodox Jewish pants?)

[vivalostwages]

(((((((((((((((((((((((Hugs for Kn*ckers)))))))))))))))))))))))))

And jelly beans, and Bertie Bott’s Every Flavor Beans, and lots of pie, and a big towel to clean off the spit, and just take some comfort in the fact that at least it was spit and not the Gross And Terrible Thing you mentioned in the Pit.

–viva

[Ephemera]

Mmm… girl-girl Trek Dope panda.

[Tars_Tarkas]

*Originally posted by tracer *
**(He wasn’t wearing any Orthodox Jewish pants?) **

Are those the pants specially built for the circumcised man?

we don’t wear pants on Mars.

[vivalostwages]

*Originally posted by Aesiron *
**Mmm… girl-girl Trek Dope panda. **

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I just can’t post anything when Aes is around!
Good thing I didn’t mention poolside candles.

[Ephemera]

Can pandas swim?

[vivalostwages]

*Originally posted by Aesiron *
**SNIP
Speaking of which, you forgot to mention mine and NCB’s constant sniping at each other, viva. For shame. **

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It should be "NCB’s and my constant sniping at each other.

There’s a reason for the constant sniping: sexual tension. The two of you should really spend A Night In Sickbay to resolve all the tension and angst.

[tracer]

*Originally posted by Tars Tarkas *
we don’t wear pants on Mars.

Then how in heck do you keep yourself pressurized from the waist down? You’ve only got about 4 Torr of ambient atmospheric pressure there, y’know.

[Skillet38]

I nominate both of the current Enterprise threads as the biggest waste of bandwith that I can think of on these boards.

excuse me, I have to go into detox with T’pol and Hoshi, oops, I can’t reach that spot on my lower back. Honeys, could you get that for me.

and while you’re down there…

[AncientHumanoid]

*Originally posted by Skillet38 *
**I nominate both of the current Enterprise threads as the biggest waste of bandwith that I can think of on these boards.

**

He noticed!
As for sexual tension between me and Aes… it’s been resolved. :o (that is the oral sex smiley, right? Aes, try Jaegermeister. It’ll get the taste out.)