There is an insect, or former insect (he’s pushing up daisies) upon my filing cabinet. I’m not sure how he got there, but he is most definitely belly up. It is :
black with white spots
the spots are symmetrical, with a pair that are somewhat pronounced on the back (look sort of like eyes), but not much bigger than the other dots.
two sleek wings, also black with white spots, about 2" wingspan
red tip at the end of it’s abdomen
abdomen is fairly consistent in diameter along the entire body, with no pronounced thin thorax (think bee more than wasp), just under 3/16 of an inch across.
it looks “dangerous”, but does not appear to have any stinger still attached.
I realise this picture is mismatched to your description in one or two places, but in the absence of your own snapshot, perhaps it will serve as a datum from which we can compare features.
The Polka-Dot Wasp Moth looks a lot like Mangetout’s last guess but I think it shares a few more features with your description. Here are afewpictures to compare. These came from the ever-helpful whatsthatbug.com. Scroll down to find where I got the Polka-Dot Wasp Moth pics from.