Olentzero, the “Yes, Virginia…” reference was priceless. You are brilliant.
Hey Olentzero
it’s good to be back. My home computer didn’t used to be able to access the Dope with any convenient speed, so I barely tried all summer break. Apparently, though, the new software runs a lot faster on my POS, so I’m back. I just recently found out about Wally, which was a real bummer, but at least I’m back among friends.
Sorry for the hijack.
–John
Don’t let Coldfire catch you asking this. He’s apt to respond with a biting “Duh”.
I have no doubts, myself though, having been personally welcomed.
Olentzero - job very well done.
Just because there is/was a legal battle over ownership of the name does not necessarily mean that the entity in question does not exist.
As an example (and I have no source to cite), I had heard that the whole fuss about the-artist-once-again-known-as-Prince was really precipitated by an argument with his record lablel. They still owned the rights to “Prince”, so he just remonikered himself until their rights expired.
If the Chicago Reader had an exclusive contract with Cecil Adams and filed suit to prevent him from publishing under that name elsewhere, it does not necessarily mean he isn’t a real person.
…then again…does Prince count as a real person? 
Ed Zotti’s claims that he isn’t Cecil Adams are about as convincing as Clark Kent’s claims that he isn’t Superman.
sob
Uncle Sam knows Uncle Cecil’s little secrets.
sob
Unca Cecil is dead?!?! 
Nay, child! As long as we keep him alive in our hearts, he lives.
Besides, the dead are remarkably uncommunicative (Psychic Hotlines notwithstanding). If Cecil were dead, how would he write the Straight Dope articles and books? Trust me. My grandmother has been dead for almost twenty years. If any dead person were to write, it would have been her, and I haven’t received a single letter in all these years – not even a postcard!
~~Baloo
His name is Cecil Adams.
His name is Cecil Adams.
(etc.)
Amen, Olentzero, amen.
::wipes away a tear of gratitude and sighs::