ESPN has been drinking too much and this month ran a story talking about how much improved the Lions look. It seems safe, since they won zero but they are talking about being faster ,deeper and stronger.
Whenever he’s the host of Baseball Tonight, i have to restrain myself from throwing things at the TV. He’s just such a fucking jackass, and he has all these little trademark sayings that annoy the shit out of me.
“It’s time to play America’s favorite game, Name That Molina. Which Molina is it, Tim Kurkjian? Yadier? Correct. Thanks for playing America’s favorite game, Name That Molina”
Whenever a Philly player hits a homer: “Fill thine horn with oil, and go!”
That’s all i can think of right now, but i know there are others that i have mercifully failed to recall. He needs to be clubbed mercilessly.
I used to listen to ESPN radio on my drive to work and drive home. I liked Mike and Mike (well, really I just liked Greeny and tolerated Golick) in the Morning, but absolutely LOATHED Dan Patrick’s show, and couldn’t understand why he was so revered. Every interview sounded like he was reading questions off his note cards and smugly contemplating his self-perceived brilliance. Then he quit and I had high hopes for my drive home until . . . Stephen A. Fucking Smith! WTF is up with his stringing together sentences composed of thesaurus barf combined with utter lack of meaning? Thankfully he didn’t last long.
Then the local affiliate switched to a Golden Oldies format and I was left with a choice between the WEEI feed from Boston (aka: Celtics, Sox, Pats, Bruins, Pats, Sox, Pats, Sox, Celts, Yankees Suck network) or contemplative silence. I chose silence.
I still like Colin and listen to his podcast regularly. He doesn’t suck and I wish the podcast was more than a 40-minute snippet of his show.
Our former ESPN station is now a fucking hip-hop, techno-dance, shitfest. I guess that’s only one or two notches down the totem pole (or up, if one wishes to be nitpicky about one’s vernacular).
ESPN is on 24/7, and most of those hours are repetitions of Sports Center and Baseball Tonight. If you’re only halfway watching in the daytime or late at night, you might not notice you’re seeing exactly the same SC and BT for the third time. Then prime time comes, and you’re up for actual sports, but instead they give you 4 hours of Poker! “Holy cow, Jim! Did you see the way he pushed his chips into the middle? That’s bound to be on Poker Plays Of The Week.”
Who but ESPN would give you two days of live coverage and commentary of The NFL Draft?
“Six years ago, many MLB baseball players were secretly tested for steroids, with the promise that the results would never be revealed. Well, they lied, and tonight we’re going to tell you that Manny Being Manny tested positive six years ago !”