Ever feel like you aren’t doing enough in life? I’m 28 years old, have a good job, great permanent girlfriend, masters degree, a nice rental home, and a loving dog. But I sit online, night after night, thinking there should be something more. 28 years… what is that, like a bit over 10,000 days? 10,000 chances to learn a second language, or practice a musical instrument. 10,000 chances to take the initiative to call a co-worker and form more than a casual work-related friendship. 10,000 chances to experience something other than work, cook, computer, read, sleep, work again. It’s just so empty in the scheme of things. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t feel overly depressed or anything, and certainly not unappreciative of everything I have. But when I sit here alone at night, I feel like I’m wasting life. I look back at the past year, or the past five years (etc), and wonder “could I have done a bit more?” This day could have been spent sitting by a babbling brook, that day could have been spent watching children play a game of softball at the nearby park. I could have volunteered this evening at the local library, or spent that evening working a second job and donating the money to something.
Look, I’d cognizant enough to realize this sounds lame. Probably even a bit whiney, or maybe clichéd or too sappy. Definitely a bit too much ‘bared soul’ to share with my co-workers. Would probably turn red if I shared it with anyone other than internet strangers, actually. Not sure what I’m getting at, might just be some late-night rambling. But life seems to be filled with these late nights, filled with wasted time. I’m just left with the ongoing feeling that I’m not doing enough to make the world a better place, whatever that means. Know what I mean?
I’m 34. I also have a good job and I’m getting married in July. My sweetie lives in a different state, so I also spend a lot of time online.
But…some of that time is spent learning Latin. One of my online friends speaks it fluently and helps me. This is something I do for me, there is no other reason.
I also do animal rescue, mostly cats, but sometimes dogs and once helped to rescue an almost dead horse. A lot of my knowledge and resources came from people I’ve met online.
When I look back at my life, I do think I’ve made a small difference in my corner of the world, and I think that as I continue to learn and grow, I’ll be able to do more.
So, no, I don’t feel the way that you do. Find a cause that means something to you and do something. Just giving money will make you feel better in the short time, but actually committing to a cause and working at it will make you feel much better than throwing money at the problem. Its time well spent.
If you have a good job you’re paying taxes and contributing to the economy. That’s more than a lot of people are doing. Save a little money to contribute where you feel it’s needed, then enjoy your life. You have plenty of time left in life to do even more if you want to, and you can.
You’re only 28? You have your “whole life ahead of you”. Or that’s what was said to me at age 25. Guess what? That’s not really true. I just came to realize that most people’s main accomplishments, be they works of art, novels or whatnot, are completed mainly by people in their 10s through 40s. **Age 25 to 49 is your “go” period. Get anything you aspire to achieve done now. ** It goes by fast. Hate to yank your chain with a wake-up call, but that’s the deal we’re all faced with.
But at the same time, enjoy bubbling meadow streams.
Sometimes…in my youth, I wanted to travel to lots of 3rd world places (Egypt, Macchu Picchu, East Africa, etc.).
Now I’m content to watch Lonely Planet videos of other people visiting those places…I’m not keen on using outdoor toilets, getting malaria, hepatitis, etc.
I hear about how busy other people’s lives are and how much they contribute - and I just don’t do enough! I have lots of wasted time and do volunteer a bit but I’m sure I could do so much more.
I’m trying to find new things to fill up my life that give me a feeling that I’m doing something worthwhile rather than just my selfish indulgences.
I told a friend that I felt like this and they couldn’t understand what else I was looking for as they thought my life was already busy. I was thinking of studying something new would at least give me goal but doesn’t really give back.
Then I do wonder if the human race could harness all the hours we sit watching television what we could achieve?!
If you still feel the same way after nearly 8 months, then you should seriously do something about it!
I am in the same boat. Today, I am trying to logically sort this out for myself! What can I do to make me feel content! I need to do something with my life which makes me happy and makes some difference to other people’s lives! In mundane sense, I also have everything people usually want!
I am trying to write about all the things I liked doing from my childhood, about my fantasies about being content, which of them still make me tick, and is there something I haven’t explored yet!
Writing helps! You can go back to it and re-judge your arguments again and again until you figure it out!
Until then, try to enjoy every moment of your life that is slipping through your fingers. Feel the breeze, hear the birds, watch the children playing and smiling, go for long walks, get involved in some exercises/sports, where you feel your life in a stronger way, stay away from surfing internet and tv! All the best!
I never feel like I’ve done enough. People’s lives are falling apart all over the world and it seems like if I had any shred of decency in me, I’d be dedicating every waking moment to reducing others’ suffering. I work in non-profit development but overall, I spend more time thinking about what’s wrong with the world than actually doing something about it. Human nature I guess.
Now you could work really hard at something (become a concert pianist or an triathlon competitor.)
But unless you like achieving that (and spending almost all of your time doing it), you can push yourself too hard.
I became an international chess player after seven years studying and playing. To me, that was a great result.
But I had to sacrifice other things to do it.
For example, I only started cooking aged 55. :rolleyes:
So make sure you keep up with all the happy things in your life and try:
relaxation techniques (meditation, yoga etc.)
a new hobby (I recommend Lord of the Rings Online )
some volunteer work
learning about folk much less fortunate than yourself
the great conundrum is to pick a side and follow it. Either try to accomplish as much as possible with your life, or give in to the nagging suspicion that we are just a little speck of dust in an infinite, probably incomprehensible universe, so party hearty, enjoy it while you can, and try to smile at the end.
I didn’t realize this is a zombie, but I still feel it’s a worthwhile discussion.
I think it’s a pretty normal feeling, and to some extent a healthy one. A certain amount of restlessness is helpful to making sure we keep our momentum going and take the occasional risk.
I get on my case sometimes for having a boring year- never mind that I’m having a baby, got married, finished grad school, got a job, bought some real furniture, taken a couple international trips, etc. I mean, what else do I expect from myself? I think I keep contrasting this workaday life with my more freewheeling traveling days and it all feels less significant. When I really look back then, though, I wasn’t exactly feeling like the master of the universe when I as stuck in a South African village for months on end or when I was hanging around China waiting to get back to where I could get a real job and go on some actual dates. I think I’ve pretty much always felt this way.
Anyway, the unease I’m feeling now is starting to transition from vague restlessness to an actual plan, and it’s helped me get motivated to start saving for a house and lay some groundwork for a planned career change. I think it will all add up in the end, it’s just kind of a process to get there, and that process sometimes includes spending a night web surfing and wondering why you aren’t doing something more useful.
)