Had a shameful moment of absent-mindedness this week, dropping my 3 yo son off at nursery, with our 2 week old daughter in the back of the car. Got there, and completely forgot I had two kids, just got the boy out and left daughter in the pod sitting in the (unlocked) car. Went in, was chatting to the nursery staff for 5 mins, came out and HOLY SHIT, I actually have another child!!!
OK, tame story - nothing happened and there wasn’t a great risk of anything ever happening. But the mental shock of just completely forgetting about a kid, then remembering, was really strong - stayed with me all week.
Anyone fancy sharing stories of leaving their offspring marooned? Nothing super serious, like social services took your kids because you went on holiday without them, just acute cases of temporarily forgetting you’re a parent. It could serve as a lesson to others
Years ago we went camping, just my wife and I (this was before we had kids). We took our reincarnated rat we called a dog with us. Last day at the campsite it started to rain as we were loading up. We finished loading the jeep, took a last look around to make sure we didn’t leave anything in camp, then hightailed it down the canyon before the rain got worse.
20 mins later: “Where’s Paco?” Pause.“OH SHIT!”. A quick U-turn and 20 minutes back up the river… there he was, still in camp, soaking wet and just as happy as his half a brain could get. We dried him off, wrapped him in a sleeping bag and put him in the footwell with the heater on. I doubt he could have cared less.
Today we have two kids and I’m paranoid about letting them out of my sight (ages 6 and 4). Some call this OCD but dammit there’s a reason I freak out about the idea of my kids being forgotten somewhere. I almost lost my dog.
well, after 9 years of dropping kids off and picking them up from various schools without fail I completely forgot about my middle son at the beginning of this last school year.
This was the first year my oldest son was not in the same school as middle son (moved up to middle school) and my youngest is still in preschool. Also middle school starts a thousand times earlier so I was basically still jet lagged from this massive time shift to the family schedule.
Anyway, my oldest son had called me mid-day to say he had been “stabbed in the eye.” After some interrogation I decided his condition did not warrant being picked up early from school and declined to get him. But I did worry. When he finally got off the bus I was extremely relieved to see that “stabbed in the eye” did not translate into any visible injury.
The relief I felt is the only explanation I can find for why I then did not leave to get middle son from school (usually oldest getting off the bus is the cue to buckle up youngest and go get middle). I must’ve had a sort of “my work is done” sensation. I was happily reading the Dope when the phone rang. As I was rising to answer it I was struck with a feeling that I had forgotten something important. By the time I got to the phone I was devastated to remember what it was. :smack:
When my oldest son was in kindergarted I forgot him at the babysitter’ and was 20 miles down the road before I remembered.
And…when my daughter was a few months old, we accidently left her sleeping in the van while we went into WalMart. By “we” I mean myself, a 2 year old, and the older two boys, who were 10 and 12 at the time. AND, to make myself look even more neglectful, the older kids climbed right past her as I held the door for them.
Thank God, when we got in and I did a head count and was making arrangements about when/where to meet, the 10 year old suddenly looked around and said, “Wait, where’s the baby?” I looked at him like he’d just asked me where I’d left the Martian for a few seconds before it dawned on me that…hmmm, where IS the Weeping Princess?
She was right where we’d left her, sleeping peacefully. It’s an experience I always think of when I read those horrifying stories about parents who accidently leave their babies in hot cars. Incredibly horrible scary stuff really does happen sometimes. I just got lucky.
Here’s my story, posted a few weeks ago. Absolutely terrifying moment of realization, and I feel so awful for those parents whose children are harmed by such a moment of absent-mindedness.
I did. Miscommunication between parents is mostly what happened. It involved the car, about ten minutes, and it was awful. Really, truly awful. It could have been tragic if it had been warmer outside.
I once dropped my kids off at the wrong temple for high holy days.
We had just joined a new temple and my wife was singing in the choir. Since I’m not Jewish I didn’t particularly want to sit through the service alone, so I volunteered to drop the kids off for the youth program, then she’d bring them home afterward.
What I didn’t realize was that our congregation was holding their services at a nearby hotel, and our temple was being rented out to a different congregation for the day. I dutiful followed the signs to where the youth program was being held. I didn’t recognize anyone, but since we were new to the temple anyway that wasn’t surprising.
The trouble came a few hours when my wife called in a panic saying that they couldn’t locate our kids! In fact, they didn’t even have a record of them being signed in! It took several minutes before we figured out what the problem was. We rushed over the temple where my son and daughter were happily having milk and cookies. They had such a good time they wanted to go back next year … .
I was left in a travel agents when I was about eight. We went in with two families and the kids were told to sit and be quiet. I sat up at the counter and was happily reading the travel brochures when I looked up to find the shop was empty. I panicked and ran outside, absolutely NO SIGN of anyone.
What was frightening was we lived in Germany and were visiting friends in England, so though I could speak English I had no cultural knowledge of the place, no idea of the address we were staying at and even didn’t know when I came to think of it, the surname of the family we were staying with. I started to cry and a woman called the attention of a policeman who took my hand and said we’d go to the police station.
At that point I was UTTERLY terrified as my parents had always drummed into me that if lost we were to never, ever move but they would come back for us. I knew that if I was taken from that street I’d never see my parents again. Not to mention I was used to German police who were scary to me, so I wasn’t sure if English police were nice or not but I rather thought not…
Just at that moment the father of the family we were staying with came racing up and grabbed me and explained what had happened to the policeman MUCH to my relief and took me off to the rest of the gang who were at least 20 minutes before they’d noticed I’d gone. Or rather that THEY had gone! I was still there all along.
Honestly, no. I really can’t understand parents who accidentally leave their kids in the car.
Ever since we brought MilliCal home friom the hospital I’ve been aware that I have a constant worry reminder in my head that asks me every few seconds where she is. It’s still going, now that she’s almost 14. There’s no way I could walk off and leave her in the car, because the damned thing would go off in my head before I got three feet.
It’s going to be very weird when she goes away to college, or moves out.
It’s all forty-some years ago, but my mom never could remember where she’d left a child or two. My siblings and I can each tell at least one different story about how we ended up walking home from CCD, Little League, kindergarten… sometimes a mile or more from home.
Nope, never. And I just don’t understand how it happens either.
I mean, I can understand if you thought your kid’s event was over at 4pm and it was really over at 3 and you were late to pick him up. But how does one just forget their kids needs picking up? And how do you not know you have a child in your car? I always look at my car before walking away from it.
It’s never happened to me, but I totally understand how it could. As a single Mom of a sleep-optional child with a very responsible job, there were many times when I worried that I might do something stupid. If Celtling wasn’t in the car with me, I always put my purse, briefcase, and anything else I needed into her carseat - so that I could never exit the car without checking that spot. I also had a rule that I always looked there when I stopped at a stoplight.
My parents on the other hand left us any number of times. Once they left us both at church, and we had walked at lest two miles before they finished making breakfast and started looking for us.
The worst was when my Mom and brother left me at a highway rest stop. It’s a wonder my generation survived!
Once when my youngest was a baby. Our routine was that I would take the baby to daycare, then drive the oldest to school since it was close to my office. One day we were running late so I took the oldest to school, and then was about to enter the office parking garage when I realized the baby was still in the car. So I really understand how disruptions to a longstanding routine can cause someone to forget their kid.
This has never happened to me, but it’s something that I had recurring nightmares about when I was pregnant with my first. Almost every night I had a dream that my husband and I left the baby in the trunk of the car while we went to the mall. I can understand how this would happen to someone who is out of their routine and doesn’t normally have the kids with them.
Never had. I had a Daddy radar installed that pings very often and I can’t ignore it unless I know where my kids are. That said, I’m fine if someone else is responsible for them.
similar thing happened with neighbors of mine when i was a wee one, according to my mother. they were moving out of state, and it was apparently quite the dog and pony show: two cars, moving truck, kids running amok, the expected chaos.
ten minutes after the dog and pony show left, the driver of the moving truck shows up on mom’s doorstep with one the kids in tow. they missed one, he told her. understandable. they had like 10 children.
the driver can’t take the kid - state law, company rules, yadda yadda. he leaves the kid with mom, mom calls in the state troopers and the great search was on, but somehow the dog and pony show slips through the dragnet.
missing #10 isn’t discovered missing until about 200 miles later, when they stopped for a break. upon counting heads you can imagine how the parents felt. each thought the other had #10. oops.
everybody was eventually reunited hours later. the cops never did find them, but mom called off the dragnet once the dad returned for #10.
Not yet… and at 17 and 14 I assume they’d complain!
My mother, however… I was 11. One of my brothers was trying out for the football team or something, and needed a mouthpiece from Sears, at a small shopping center about 2.5 miles from our house. The library had a branch in that same shopping center, so I begged to ride along to swap out some books.
Mom didn’t want me to. She wanted to get in and out quickly - it was after dinner and she didn’t want me to hold them up. I begged, and promised to be in and out in 10 minutes.
She dropped me off - it was 7:30 or thereabouts (on a summer evening). I swapped my books, went back outside and waited out front.
At 9:00, when the library was closing, I started walking home. Note that by 9:00, it had gotten dark and the walk involved a fairly busy stretch of non-lit road.
I made it most of the way home, when some neighbors saw me, pulled over, and gave me a ride the rest of the way home.
I got home, dumped my books, went downstairs to the room where the parents and siblings were watching TV. Didn’t say a word for a few minutes and they never did either.
Then I said “Thanks for leaving me at the library”.
Mom was HORRIFIED. She had COMPLETELY forgotten that I’d gone to the mall with them.
