So yesterday I made a post lamenting that after weeks of finding no events I wanted to get out of the house for, there’s suddenly a boatload of things I want to see and do on the 6th and I have to pick and choose. I listed a bunch, in case anyone else wanted some ideas. A friend posted “I think you could fit all that in one day.” I posted back “Yeah, unfortunately many of them are going on at the same times.” She posted back, “Stay 10 minutes at each place.”
I can’t tell if she’s joking.
If she’s joking, it’s very funny, because not a single thing I listed is something it’d be feasible to spend just 10 minutes doing. But this is an old buddy from high school who I just friended a couple of days ago, and I don’t exactly remember her being this clever; and if she’s serious, then jeez louise, I’m not some Hollywood person stopping off at these places to be SEEN or something, I honestly want to spend time enjoying them. Really, if she’s serious, she’s suggesting I spend:
10 minutes at an art studio open house in a building with over 30 artists
10 minutes at a 3 Stooges movie marathon
10 minutes on a 10-mile bike tour/pub crawl
10 minutes at an art/music festival that ranges through several blocks in downtown Detroit
10 minutes watching the Jon Stewart/Bill O’Reilly debate (after paying 5 bucks for the privilege, I suppose)
10 minutes at my grandmother’s 97th birthday party, held at a sit-down restaurant (oh yeah, that would go over well)
and my favorite, 10 minutes at the Grand Rapids Art Prize festival, which like the Detroit festival ranges all over the city, and is a two-hour drive each way just to get there.
I think I’m just going to say nothing.
My best guess is she was semi-serious the first time with “you could go to all of them”, and then, realising that you couldn’t really, turned it into “spend 10 minutes at each” and pretended that’s what she meant all along.
I think you post your laughter and let it go. Either she was joking (which seems more likely), and your laughter is perfectly appropriate, or she wasn’t joking, and by your response, she might actually figure out how illogical she was being. Maybe.
Either way, it ought not to be any skin off your back.
Well, I once unfriended someone over a “War on Christmas” comment. I was going to respond…and then realized that it really was not worth it. If someone is that intolerant of other religions, I don’t need to bother with them.
BTW, your friend’s comment sounds like a joke to me. Not everyone is the same as they were in high school, you know ;).
I think it would be awesome to jump in to the middle of the bicycling pub tour, and play it like you’ve been there all along. “What? No, I was there… we were just at different tables.”
Yeah, I have. It’s called every post by my mom. Lord Jesus above, please give me the strength to not unfriend her. Examples:
Me: Hey, y’all, it would be fun if we went to this trampoline park. Here’s the website.
Friends: Normal responses, some anecdotes about how they’ve been and it’s fun, and the like.
Mom: They want you to sign a liability waiver! Something something about safety.
Oh-kaaaaaay. Or…
Me: Holy shit, there’s a mouse in my apt!
Friends: Normal stuff.
Mom: Watch your language.
Me: Stop fucking posting on my page with this bullshit. Okay, I didn’t say that. I just ignored it.
Or…
Me: Holy Jesus, there are some terrifyingly giant rats at the L station.
Friends: Normal stuff.
Mom: You should talk to your landlord…
Me: ( Still trying to figure out how to respond to that one. What does my landlord have to do with rats at a public train station? And I swear my Facebook feed isn’t as vermin focused as it would seem from these examples. I’ll close this parenthesis now.)
But anyway, as for the OP, I’d just like the comment and move on.
I had a wall post once from a friend’s ex-girlfriend, who I hadn’t had much contact with when they were together, and who I hadn’t spoken to at all for at least a couple of years, and who I think by this point had a child with another man
A childhood friend that I ended up dating casually in high school would post on my wall a lot. He always used our childhood nicknames, which I was totally fine with. I’d always answer him back using his just to be silly.
The last time I did that (a few years ago), he posted this HUGE missive on how my using that nickname obviously meant I was out of touch with reality and mentally ill, and I needed to go see a doctor right away. He was so worried, blah blah etc. It was really bizarre, and I never responded. We’ve basically had no contact since, even though I’m still pretty good friends with his sister.
A friend of mine from back in high school had posted something along the lines of: You don’t really understand something until you can explain it to a fifth grader. (She has a pre-schooler and a 1st grader)
So I responded with a light hearted - yeah - wait until fourth grade math and try to explain the difference between a trapezoid and a rhombus to your kid!
This was met by a third high-school friend of hers (let’s call her WaytooUptight Lucy) - but only an acquaintance of mine - with a diatribe about how fourth graders shouldn’t be learning geometry, and that this was the reason high school kids didn’t know their multiplication tables and why American schools are falling so far behind other countries blah blah blah blah blah.
OK - here it s - I found it:
“4th graders are being taught about the differences between rhombus and trapezoid when most high school students don’t know how to multiply and divide!!! That is ridiculous…4th graders should be memorizing times tables and learning to understand the concept of multiplication and division, not be starting geometry. No wonder American students are academically behind most other developed countries…”
I had to try a first response of “??? I seriously can’t tell if you are joking or not”
Turns out…Nope - she wasn’t joking - she gave me another paragraph about how she knows all about educational curriculum because she’s an ENGINEER… blah blah blah blah blah.
Still trying to figure out how to respond to that one. What does my landlord have to do with rats at a public train station? And I swear my Facebook feed isn’t as vermin focused as it would seem from these examples. I’ll close this parenthesis now.)