I’m looking for FUNNY ways you have knocked yourself unconscious- no lasting damage,
and has to be a little funny
I just brought this up because recently I was out at a Homecoming festivity, and it was a lip Sync. There was hip swaying in short shorts by girls, and cross-dressed breakdancing by the guys, but at the end, This guy was belting out the final tone of a song, arms outstretched, and he was just bulging at the neck from the last chord which he was giving all of his might to. Then, from the back, PLANNED OF COURSE, someone came running up with an old wooden, previously cracked, guitar, and SMACKED him ont he back of the head with. The Kid IMMEDIATELY went down, and stayed there, everyone thought it was part of the act, but the kid had hit him with the NON-cracked, REINFORCED edge of the guitar. mild-medium concussion, no lasting damage.
not really funny… but no one seriously hurt…
if needed, move to IHMO
You are so weird. Cute, but weird 
I was once fooling around with my friends at the kiddy playground up the street. At that time (it’s been changed since for safety reasons) it had this merry-go-round thing where people would sit on seats and somebody woudl get in the middle and run around like mad to turn the thing in a circle. Well, I was in the middle running around like mad to push my friends, and I tripped and fell down. My friends thought it was hilarious, of course, and didn’t stop the spinning, so every time I tried to get up I’d bonk my head on one of the metal rails. I didn’t LEARN from that, and kept bonking my head, until finally I tried to stand up and got one right in the base of the neck and fell over, unconscious. My friends STILL didn’t realize, and kept going for a minute, then stopped and flipped out. I woke up only a few seconds later and was ok, but I don’t play that game any more.
The only other time I’ve knocked myself out was while trying to show off on roller-skates to this cute guy at the skating rink. I was 13 at the time. My feet went faster than I did and I ended up on my back with a concussion on the cement floor.
OK, so one person replied, 2 if you count Sandyr telling me I was a wierd and cute person-
I have told no one else this, and because you and I have become such good friends since June, I feel that I can disclose this with you.
So I am at my BEST FRIEND’s (Wes) house, best friend’s since kindergarten. and we went outside after having WAY too much caffeine at 10:00 at night. Everything is a blur, and it is REALLY dark out. We decide to play a joke on his dad! WE would ring the front doorbell, then run around to the back of his house and ring the back doorbell. We agreed in our silly little daze that it would be the BEST!
SIDE NOTE NOT KNOWN TO ME-
a B-line from the front door to the back door would not be possible, the back door leads out to a patio, roughly 15feet long, by 9feet wide. The side of the patio is 8ft. Concrete cotta stones, and the end of the patio leads up, and around to the terracing, like a large U shaped.
So we anxiously hit the doorbell, Running, and giggling around the house, and he runs down the terracing, and around the U shape to the patio. Me, being the quick-witted man I am, suddenly wondered why I was floating in mid-air!
I had RUN OFF OF THE concrete cliff, and was hovering over the patio, I heard my friends go HOLY SHIT!!!
I then Jumped up from the ground saying how sweet that was, and how I wanted to do that again!
my friends (there was another friend over also, his name is Mike) looked at me, and broke out laughing they had told me I was unconscious, and were wodnering if I had died, or broken something. When I was going over the cliff, I had blacked out, and at that moment, Mike had said, HOLY SHIT, he’s got balls of BRASS!!!
heh… kinda funny
nol lasting damage… I think
One time I was wandering around my house in ther dark (I don’t remember why) and went into my office. My dog was sleeping in the middle of the floor. I tried to step over the dog to put some stuff on my desk, but at the same moment my dog decided to stand up. The next thing I knew I was looking up at my roommate and he was going “man, I thought you were dead”. Apparently I had tripped on my dog and whacked my forehead on my desk (evidenced by the huge knot on my skull). My roommate heard the whack and had jumped out of bed and came running. I was only out for a few minutes but I felt out of whack for a couple days after that.
Didn’t actually knock myself out, but came pretty darn close once. I have a pair of mini-chucks that I use to exercise the muscles in my upper back and shoulders when my back is acting up.
I got a little careless one day and gave myself a good solid whack upside the head. I can’t imagine the embarassment if my mom had come home and found me unconscious with chucks firmly gripped in my little craps dealer paw…
Twice… one with a pair of chucks, got goin’ really fast and went for the under-arm, flipped up over the bicep, and nailed my self in the back of the head… I’m actually not sure if I went out, but I went down pretty hard.
The other time was the whole “pinch the arteries going to the brain off” thing… things went fuzzy, and quiet, and the next thing I know the girl I was hanging out with was looking down at me, just shaking her head.
Cool visions… wish I could remember any of them.
All of this was a long, long time ago… like 7 years… way in the past… I’m much better now… hehehe
When my best friend and I were pre-teens and teens, we were skaters when it was just becoming a fad, wide boards tail kicked up. Everything was FINE when I that was then.
In college we decided to try it again… we went out and bought new $120 skateboards. (different by now, narrower with both ends kicked up) and took them to the college parking lot and skitched (is that the right word for hanging on to the back of a car while it drives?) for awhile. We figured we had it down again and decided to take off to a local park called Lake Jacomo. BTW its now about 2:30 in the morning and the park is closed but we walk the dark unlighted roads to a massive hill. Under the moon and starlight we look down this huge steep hill and can not see the bottom… only darkness. We look at each other and say “lets go!” and begin to coast down the hill, about a quarter of the way down we had picked up major speed and were still side by side. I felt my board shimmy as they do when there about to go out of control but I got control again. My friend jumped off his taking massive running leaps but did not fall. I foolishly thought I would try to stay on. I didn’t know the REALLY steep part was still to come. Halfway down my board picked up MORE speed and begain to shimmy more… by this time I was going WAY TOO FAST TO JUMP OFF even REMOTLY safely. I regained control ONCE MORE and prayed to God that I would make the bottom and up the following hill to slow down. Just then it started to shimmy and shake and I couldn’t get it back and I knew I was doomed I was thrown/jumped off and I remember my right foot hitting the ground as if in a run then, I THOUGHT I jumped right up afterwards but my friend said I was knocked cold and didn’t move for a couple of minutes. What had happened was my right foot had hit the ground then I was thrown into a flip by the momentem, contacting the ground again with the BACKSIDE of my right shoulder and head with feet in the air. My friend said I continued that about three times before I came to a stop on my back knocked cold. I ended up with a big bump on my head, and shreaded jeans and knee, but thankfully (I guess) my shoulder took most of the impact. I had thought it was dislocated though I never went to the doctor so I guess it wasn’t, but it WAS massivly sprained… I couldn’t move it for days and couldn’t even button my pants for 2 weeks any pressure hurt that bad.
Hindsight I wish I WOULD have gone to the doctor because I now to this day have a permanent lump on my shoulder and it aches incredibly when I’m under stress and tension.
Oh yeah… I haven’t skateboarded since! 
A substitute science teacher at my junior high school knocked himself out if that counts. He was trying to explain to a group of students that the bullet-proof windows that my school had were designed to be able to absorb and reflect the energy that a striking object posessed. He went and got a hammer, and hit it as hard as he could to demonstrate. The hammer bounced out of his hand and knocked him on his ass for about 20 minutes until one of the nurses used smelling salts.
I used to knock myself and others out on purpose. Does that count? We would stand against a wall, have someone give us a stinger, have someone push on our ribcage until we couldn’t stand it anymore, and then pass out for a few seconds. Great fun at parties…Amaze your friends!
hahaahahhahahaahha
That is the funniest thing I have ever heard in my life!!!
When I was about four years old, I was put onto this mad rocking horse thing in a playground. Back then, these particular rocking horses were violently jarring, as they had a very narrow swing, that tended to get fast and jerky very easily.
Well, I was put on the front seat, and I think my brother pushed it for me. zingzangbonk I hit my head into the horsehead, and everything went black.
About two minutes later I woke up again, sitting on the grass with my Mother comforting me.
I have never gotten on a rocking horse since then, and about five years ago I think they banned all those rocking horses from playgrounds. (Only took them 20 years after the event).
When I was a kid, my friends and I used to “explore” the concrete drainage pipes (five to six feet in diameter) that ran under the town. At one point the city installed big rectangular conduits. They had odd fittings where the round concrete joined the rectangular concrete.
One day we got spooked for some reason (snake?) and I, the leader, was the last of the group out. Where the round tube fit the rectangular conduit there was a six-inch lip hanging down. Well, I’m in a panic and the glare of the sunshine at the mouth of the tunnel had me a bit disoriented. I’m running full-speed and didn’t duck at the six-inch lip.
I smacked full-speed into the concrete edge, which thankfully caught me only on the forehead. My body kept going, feet flying ahead, but my head rebounded down into the mud on the floor of the tunnel. Laid out as if Dick Butkus had just clotheslined me. I was out cold for a minute or two.
Had a heck of a time explaining all the blood to my mom.
Used to keep pigs in an electric fence. While out feeding them one morning, I noticed that the fence was down in one corner of their enclosure. Happened to be in one of their deepest wallows but I had knee high rubber boots on. Normaly would have gone and turned the fence off to make the repairs but reasoned that it wouldn’t be necessary since I also had rubberized gloves on. The wire was held on to the metal post with a plastic clip so had to bend over and using one hand on each side of the post, try to feed the wire back through the clip. I got nailed HARD (must have had a hole in the gloves) which caused me to let out a squeal loud enough to alert my wife. I slammed my head into the metal post and fell back into the slop. Was out long enough cause the wife to ruin the first new pair of shoes she’d had in a long time. I think that in hind sight she regrets saving my bacon.
Oh, my friends and I used to knock ourselves out on purpose all the time. You bend at the waist, touching your toes, and breathe deeply for about 10 seconds, then stand up and cross your arms over your chest, as someone bear-hugs you from behind. You’ll pass out after a few seconds, and have some wicked ass dreams in the meantime. This is such a warm memory, because we always did it at Mike’s house. His front room had a gas heater, so it was always very dry and warm, and we’d pile the room with blankets and pillows and such, and everyone would take their shoes off, then we’d do this constantly for a few seconds.
One time, after I passed out, instead of falling down, I remained standing and started walking to the kitchen. After a few seconds, I woke up. I turned around, blinked, looked at my friends, and said “Where the fuck am I going?” right as they collapsed in laughter.
Lots of times, while passed out, your body would twitch and spasm. One time I was on my stomach, and I started bucking my legs like a bronco. We also used to coordinate passing out with saying something, the most common being the “Mock” “Ing” thing from Dumb and Dumber. We’d pass out two at a time, and try to say “Mock” “Ing” as we passed out.
God, we did this a million times. Such great memories.
I suppose this all explains a lot, eh?
–Tim
I once knocked myself out playing wiffle ball in my friend’s backyard. I got a hit, but since it was a wiffle ball, it didn’t go too far, so as I ran to first base, I watched the guy going for the ball so I could see whether I could stretch it into a double. I ran right over first base as straight into a tree, resulting in ten seconds of unconsciousness and concussion #2 (out of an eventual 5). No big deal, though. I was fine twenty minutes and an icepack later.
The funny part was when I came to, my friends were all standing around me horrified, and all I could think to do was blurt, “Am I out?”
Oh yeah Homer, this was also one of the great boredom killers of me and my freinds. The only dream I remember from any of the times I did it was me running through a jungle calling “Gilligan”. Pure hilarity.
Let’s see….
Sledman with the TKO on Sledman…
First one. When I was about 8 years old we had this contraption for practicing hitting for baseball. It basically consisted of a solid metal pole in a concrete….ummm bad word… cement base. The base weighed in at about 50 pounds. There was a pole with a hard plastic ball on the end that slipped onto the base pole and was held in place by a large rubber band, When you hit the ball it swung around the pole and wound the rubber band. Eventually resulting in the ball being pitched back to you. Now see you would guess I got smacked by the ball wouldn’t you. Ohh no… Young Sled decided to move the whole apparatus one day. Well at 8 years old I wasn’t lifting the base so being as how it was round on the edges I layed it on its side and rolled it to the new location. And then I tipped it upright….while standing in front of it. WHACK!!! Right in the chin. Ass over tea kettle and out like a light for a good 5 minutes.
Second.
Anyone have one of those Daisy 10 pump BB/Pellet guns. I don’t remember the model but I was about 11 and took it out one day and was in the process of pumping it up…46-47----48------49----- and my hand slips off and the metal pump lever rockets backwards catching me under the chin. No idea how long I was out on that one.
Body Blow, Body Blow, Knock him Out!
A few months ago we remodeled our kitchen. We replaced the old fridge with one with the freezer on the bottom. The night after the work was done, Mrs. D was out and I was downstairs goofing around with the kids. Went upstairs for a beer. There were no lights on upstairs, but I figured, when I open the fridge, the little light will go on providing plenty of illumination (doing my best to conserve energy!) Well, if you’ve never noticed before, with the freezer-on-the-bottom fridge, the handle is in essentially the same place as conventional models, but when you open the door, the top of the door comes up higher than the normal chest level or so. So I swing the door open and the top corner hits me right between the eyes. (You might be going through your life not realizing the force behind a fridge door when you swing it open.) Next thing I knew I was sitting on my butt in the kitchen. Being the only (responsible?) adult home, I remember telling myself I can’t pass out. So, I decide against the beer, and go back downstairs to play with the kids.
A couple of minutes later, I have a sensation of wetness on my face. I touch my face and the hand comes away red. Go back upstairs and check out a mirror. You know how a head wound gushes? AND MY 3 LOVELY KIDDIES DIDN’T SAY A DAMN THING! So I butterfly the damn thing up (probably could have used 1-2 stitches if I didn’t already have such an ugly mug-yes I have a scar) and I go back downstairs. Basically ask, “What the hell is wrong with you guys that you didn’t say anything?” Their response was, “Well, whenever we say we are hurt you always tell us to ‘Shake it off.’” I reminded them my first comment is generally, “You’d better be bleeding to be making a racket like that!”
The ever sensitive Mrs. D had a field day out of it. She got some of that foam folks use for baby proofing sharp corners in their home, and prominently posted flourescent “DANGER, Sharp corner!” signs.
Oh - and always on the lookout for a topical literature recommendation, read “The Knockout Artist” by Harry Crews. The title character is a New Orleans boxer whose talent is being able to knock himself out. And he is the most normal character in the book!