Maybe you simply fell out of love. Maybe you just didn’t know what you were saying to begin with. Maybe you believed it, but they didn’t.
In my case, I have rolled out the “L” word exactly once, when under the mesmerizing effect of youthful lust. Unfortunately, she believed it, and I ultimately did not. I learned a valuable lesson from this I shall not soon forget. I am a better man for it, but alas, too late for poor Julie.
yeah. She said it and I reciprocated. But… I really didn’t. And I knew I probably wouldn’t ever.
But, she was just so darn pretty and so happy to be with me… I was happy enough to be with her, but when I wasn’t, all these doubts kept coming back. I basically just let the relationship slowly end.
In the long run, looking back and all that, I still don’t know how I would’ve done it any differently.
After her was the girl I thought might be a lifetime match. She wasn’t. But, I really don’t regret that. Live and learn.
Yup. Said it. Told myself I meant it, too.
Otherwise, how do I justify letting him treat me the way I did? It was appallingly bad judgement on my part, and I knew it on some level even then.
But as NoClueBoy says, live and learn.
I am not prepared to regret the lessons learned there. I do sometimes regret having had to learn them the hard way.
Yeap. In high school, I didn’t realise that people said that and actually meant it. :smack:. And yes, it did end in tears. I had to lie about mumble to get her to break up with me.
I suppose I could have blamed my hormones for getting ‘love’ and ‘lust’ mixed up, but it still doesn’t stop the fact I messed with the feeling of others. Ick.
Oh, yeah. And I’ve got a (soon to be ended) miserable marriage to prove it. 
Ouch! So sorry to hear it, Badge. Best of luck in the future!
I’ve only had one GF. That was in 8th grade. We went out for a week before I realized that I was just leading her on. Never got to saying "I love you"s.
My prom date apparently really likes me. To the point where she saves my phone messages and listens to them in her spare time. Hrmm. Anyway, so I may get into a situation like that. Not sure how I’ll handle it.
Yes.
This is why I plan to do nothing that I haven’t had to hold back ten times before. By then I’ll be pretty sure I mean it.
The other thing is to imagine my image of myself after I get home after I’ve said something like that, or done (whatever). Will I be proud I did it?
I’ve only ever said it to one person, and I meant it too. Still do.
It took me ages to ever say it for the first time. Now, I say it much easier - I think I’ve kind of realized that relationships are more likely to end than last forever, so it doesn’t matter as much as I used to think it did.
Cynical? Me?
Yeah. Yeah that. Heh. now to laugh so I don’t cry.
So sorry to hear, Badge. In my case TWO miserable marriages came of my opening my big, fat, stupid mouth. It was a long long long time before I ever said that to Mr2U, you can bet.
Damn near every day of my life. I also regret the times I didn’t say it and I wish I had.
I’ve said it to one person and meant it. Unfortunately, it took a couple months for it to be reciprocated.
That’s a pretty big matzo ball hanging out there.
We’ve since broken up, but I don’t regret it in the least, and we actually still love each other, though platonically now.
Yes. Oh yes. Oh god yes. She was beautiful and super-smart. We were both poets and wrote about each other. The sex was extraordinary–passionate, kinky, daring. It was a freaking dream come true. Then she dumped me for some guy who lived upstairs, and I was crushed. Years later I ran into the guy she dumped me for. I was all ready to be angry at him until he told me that she did the same thing to him, except he wasn’t a poet.
Bitch.
The L Word…
True love is a force that is very rare and quite elusive. Too often, love gets confused with needs, lust or dependance - none of which are healthy, real or meaningful.
Yeah. Three times.
One of those times I was engaged; the other time was led to believe I was engaged; and the time before that I was in a serious but physically abusive relationship with a guy who “loved” me so much he had to own all of me.
I’m finally out of nasty relationships, and currently in a dandy one. (Two years and so far, so good.)
So I say “I love you” almost every day to the guy I’m with, and I mean it every bit as much now as I meant it then. Look, I probably haven’t learned a thing, but what is life if you’re all bitter and cynical and shit? No use making a good man suffer for the bad ones.
Preach it, sister!
Thanks, The Devil’s Grandmother! 
The L word is a tough one to deal with. If you’re with someone for longer than a week or two, it seems like not saying it hangs in the air until it’s said.
If your partner says it to you, how do you not respond in kind?
So, I guess I dropped the L word on 12 or 15 different girls before I got married. In many of those cases, Like may have been more appropriate.
I’m older and more experienced now, and if single again I would be more cautious and more ethical about dropping the L bomb.
From one of my favourite bands: