One lane, one way street, city traffic. I am #2 in a line of four cars driving down the street when an ambulance with sirens and lights on turns on to the street behind us. Naturally, all four cars pull over so that the ambulance can pass. The person in car #4 decided to take this opportunity to swing in immediately behind the ambulance so that he too could pass all the pulled over cars. I was just thinking “Oh, THE NERVE …” when a police car (I’m guessing he was following the ambulance) hits his lights and pulls the guy over. Yay!
My brother ran an experiment a couple years back. He had to go from the town where he lives to Barcelona twice in a period of three weeks; both times he was the car’s only occupant on the way there.
He started both trips with a full tank of gas, used the exact same route. First trip he let the car “coast up” so he’d be doing 130-140km/h; second time he stuck at 120km/h (the legal limit). Trip is about 400km; there are toll points every 100km or thereabouts and the last few km are within Barcelona itself. The final toll point is infamous for getting stopped-up traffic for several kilometers at peak times; it wasn’t clogged either time.
The “fast” trip took five minutes more but ate about 10% more gasoline. Definitely not worth it.
One time, this idiot guy was walking down the street, very drunk. He met up with his friend, also very drunk, and gave him a hug and high five. They both fell on the ground. When they realized that neither of them were hurt, they both started laughing hysterically. Just that instant, a cop happened to be driving by and arrested both of those idiots for public intoxication. Oh wait, that was me and my friend. :smack:
I have seen a few good traffic incidents though. One time downtown, I saw a guy turn left and cut off a cop car that was going straight in the other direction. It was perfect, seeing the cop’s tires squeal and him hitting the lights and going after the guy.
Another time, it was around 2:00 am. There were only three cars stopped at a red light. I was on one side. A guy in a pickup truck was on the other side. The guy in the pickup truck looked both ways, and when no cars were coming, went through the red light. By the way, the third car, right behind him, was a cop car.
Something doesn’t compute. Assuming the “fast” trip was the first trip, it seems odd that it took 5 minutes longer *and * 10% more fuel. Maybe that should be 5 minutes less?
But then again, calculus was never my strong point.
A couple of years ago I wake up in the morning to find my car and my friends compleatly smashed up (parked on the street). By the looks of it, someone had hit her car on the side hard enough to push it into my car and then bounced off it and hit my car, ruining both of them.
I called to report a hit and run and was told that when it happened (about 4am) there was an officer right there watching the whole thing. He said the car was close enough to him that he felt the breeze from it.
I was stuck on Florida’s Turnpike one day. One of the 2004 hurricanes was coming (I think it was Frances) and everybody was evacuating. Traffic was at a crawl.
I’m inching along and some idiot in a black SUV comes barrelling down the shoulder. I grit my teeth futiley at her, then, to my joy, who should pull out right behind her but one of FHP’s finest, lights and sirens. Hee hee hee.
What do you get for that, reckless driving, passing illegally?
I was driving a full sized Dodge van; the guy behind me was driving a Plymouth Prowler. We were in the left lane of a two lane street. The Prowler guy was in a real hurry; the right lane was full of traffic so he couldn’t move over. He could flash his lights, blow his horn, and shake his fist at me. I could see the cop sitting in a favorite speed trap location; the guy behind me couldn’t. Prowler guy caught a break in the right lane traffic, moved over, and flipped me off as he passed. He didn’t see the cop car until it was right behind him, lights flashing and siren sounding.
Another time, I was driving on a freeway; there wasn’t much traffic. Two girls in a pick up passed me—they were really hitting it. They decided to play with me so they slowed down until I was beside them. The passenger smiled at me very flirtatiously, then pulled up her tee shirt and flashed me. They sped away, laughing like loons. They slowed down again and this time the passenger mooned me. They sped away, laughing like loons. The next time I saw them, they were stopped beside the road with a highway patrolman leaning in the driver’s window. I felt sorry for them; they were just a couple of kids having fun, although they were speeding.
Your passing-on-the-shoulder story reminded me of an odd situation I had a few months back.
They were resurfacing two lanes on I-295 in Jersey one Saturday afternoon as my wife and I were going home. Immediately after the onramp, I saw one of those great big construction signs saying “Left 2 lanes closed ahead. Use right lane and shoulder.”
Sure enough, a half mile down the road the traffic jam began, except nobody was on the shoulder. They were all driving single-file in the right lane.
I said “Look at all the folks who didn’t see the sign…” to my wife, who confirmed what I had read.
We drove down the shoulder for a couple of miles, not very fast because it wasn’t a very smooth ride and we were right on the rumble strip.
As we moved along, I saw a SUV in the long line of cars on the right lane start easing towards the shoulder. He eventually was straddling the white line, causing me to come to a stop. I figured he was coming onto the shoulder too, but as traffic moved he remained on the white line, with his intent clear: he was blocking me.
I saw that there was enough room to slip past, and as I was at his side, he moved in closer. Our mirrors touched. Happily, my driver-side mirror simply folded back.
He honked and gave me the Jersey salute.
As we drove the rest of the way home, I was saying to my wife: “You know, that fellow didn’t read the sign. As far as he knew, I was being the asshole here. If I had been in his shoes, I would have blocked me too. But I was in the right, and he was wrong. But there was no way I could have ever convinced him that the sign existed, speaking through rolled-down windows. It would take too long to explain.”
You see, based on partial information, I appeared to be exactly the same as the idiot in your black SUV. But the sign said to drive on the shoulder 
.
I was that idiot, but not quite as bad. I squeaked through on the brand-new red :o , not having noticed the cop car at the light on the right. The good part is, it was a warning and I took it to heart and don’t cut it close anymore.
My dad, a retired Washington State Patrol officer, told me of a similar incident involving a motorcycle. However, the incident didn’t directly involve a cop nailing an idiot. The other drivers took care of it 
My dad was dealing with a semi truck wreck, and highway traffic was very backed up. A guy on a motorcycle apparently got tired of waiting and decided to get ahead, zipping past a very long line of cars by driving on the shoulder. Eventually, the cyclist got to the point where he had to stop because the shoulder was blocked.
Soon after, traffic finally started moving again, and the drivers in that long line of cars got their revenge by staying close together and completely preventing that motorcyclist from reentering traffic. My dad said the guy sat there on his motorcycle for a very long time 
Oooh, I have a story that gives me a warm, avenged feeling even though it happened 19 years ago.
A friend and I were driving down the freeway when a van full of boy scouts/basketball team/some form of 14-15 year old boy transit pulled alongside us and some of the boys pressed their genitals against the van window and made extremely obscene gestures at us.
The van passed us and we then saw a highway patrol officer off the side of the road with a motorist he had pulled over. We stopped and complained about the lewd van boys and the tropper radioed ahead to a trooper several miles down the road.
The trooper who was ahead pulled the van over and had the driver and all the boys in the “spread 'em” position outside the van. We pulled over behind them and the officer made all of the boys apologize to us; the trooper asked (jokingly, but the boys didn’t know it) if we wished the boys to drop trou so we could identify who the culprits were via weenie inspection. The driver was mortified by the whole thing, as he had been unaware of what was happening. Methinks some young men were probably grounded from group travel for a while.
I laughed so hard at this when it happened.
I was waiting to make a left turn at a light. Across the street from me, a guy decided to make a right turn. However, he wasn’t in the right lane. So when the light turned green, he hit the gas and cut off the guy who was in the right lane.
Guy in the right lane was a cop.
These stories kinda remind me of one of my favorite Family Guy clips.
You know, minorflat, you’re confirming something I’ve suspected for a long time - people don’t read road signs. I’ve driven behind any number of people who drove 40 km/h everywhere - in the 50 zone, in the 30 km/h school zone, in the 70 zone - I think they just don’t know what the speed limits actually are anywhere, because they don’t read the signs. We had a reality show a little while back called “Canada’s Worst Driver,” and the drivers they got on this show (all licensed, legal drivers) were absolutely frightening in terms of their skills and their complete ignorance of rules of the road and how to drive. People drive around every day completely clueless and we wonder why there are collisions.
Did you hear what some of the people said on that show though? I’d call some of those drivers deliberately ignorant:
“Speeding is safer than going with the flow.”
“Since I do well with car race video games, I can translate those skills onto the real road, and drive just as well.”
“Well, I’m a busy guy, so I have to eat lunch, drink coffee, and use my phone while driving.”
As for your speed limit remarks, you reminded me of a ladyfriend I had many years ago. No matter what street or freeway she was on, she drove 80 km/h. On the expressway with a limit of 100? Eighty. On the major city artery with a limit of 60? Eighty. On the quiet residential street with a limit of 40? Eighty. It got scary at times, I’ll tell you!
With that said though, I’ll add that some of the speed limit road signs in Calgary need to be made bigger, and warnings of lower speed limits ahead need to be made much bigger. They’ve shifted a few speed zones around in our neighbourhood, often with little to no warning, and it is so easy to miss the new, but small, signs.
“There are none so ignorant as those who will not learn”, or something like that?
I would say that they do it so the police can give more tickets out, but since there is damned little enforcement in Calgary, that ain’t it.
I was walking in a crosswalk across the main street in my town recently. I had the right of way; the WALK sign was lit up and the red traffic lights were on. Some asshole in a Volvo sped through the red light and missed hitting me by less than a foot. This was at 2:00 in the afternoon in full daylight and I was wearing a bright blue jacket; there’s no way he could have missed seeing me in the crosswalk. The Volvo was so close that I shook with fright as he passed me. I still get agitatated when I recall it. What the asshole didn’t notice was that a squad car in another lane had stopped for the red light. The cop car took off after the asshole and caught up with him about a block down the street. I had the great satisfaction of walking by the asshole as the cop handed him a ticket. I didn’t say anything as I passed by the ticket-giving scene, but I later called the police station and told the cop (I knew his name - we both work for town government) that if he needs a witness, I’m willing to go to court. Asshole. Hope they yank his license.