Jonathan Safran Foer: (Just a series of drawings illustrating how terrible Nazis, terrorists, and factory farming are, as well as how old people are awesome.)
S E Hutton
S. E. Hinton?
Dr. Seuss
(With orange juice?)
Had eggs of green,
A hatted cat,
And this and that,
And Horton (Who?
I thought you knew!)
And many more,
And more and more,
All done in verse,
Rhythmic and terse,
And on and on…
But now he’s gone.
H. Ryder Haggard: Dude with a really cool bush hat seeks fortune and lost tribes in the jungles of Africa.
Alexander McCall Smith: Large lady detective from Botswana solves mysteries for local folks, involving missing fruit and the like.
Anne Tyler -
A Baltimore Baltimorean experiences a Baltimore time of life close Baltimore to Anne Tyler’s age, and Baltimore comes Baltimore out of it neither Baltimore defeated nor victorious, but Baltimore simply wiser Baltimore.
Barbara Kingsolver - Mary Sue shows a bunch of strawman earth-haters what green living really is, bitches!
Arthur Hailey: In a common setting that employs a number of people and through which many members of the public pass; primary, secondary, and tertiary characters are examined in minute detail, three to five plots develop, and every one of them is resolved in the last three pages.
The Apostle Paul: Stop acting like idiots and serve God and each other as you would want to be treated, because he is coming back and you will be sorry you didn’t listen to me (or Him).
William S. Gray and Zerna Sharp: A Study in Psychic Transrelational Gender Modes wherein protagonists Dick an Jane run while the younger sibling Sally was relegated to “play” as was Spot.
Jane Austin: Young adults in the English countryside. Hi-jinks ensue.
Peter F. Hamilton: Take an interstellar civilization, throw a problem at it that’s so huge and unsolvable that it takes God to fix it.
Cite: Reality Dysfunction series, Fallen Angel, and the Commonwealth books (at least the first two).
David Baldacchi, Steve Martini, Scott Turow:
I’ve read all the Grisham books, now what?
Cormac McCarthy: Silent, violent men traverse depressing landscapes to wreak mayhem and bloodshed upon other violent, brooding men, which all makes the reader want to just slit his wrists.
J.R.R. Tolkein: None of my readers are going to pay much attention to what I write here, they’ll be too busy having casual intercourse with many beautiful women and they certainly won’t still be living with their mothers, now…what were my characters doing…oh yes, more walking!
E.E. “Doc” Smith: The bad guys build even bigger and badder ships and weapons than they used in the last book and threaten humanity again, so the good guys have to build even bigger and better ships and weapons than they had in the last book and go after them again, and eventually stop them, at least for now.
“I’m on a horse.”
Too many commas. 
Fixed it for ya.
I can do that to my own quote, right?
Patricia Cornwell:
Genius Medical Examiner (and in no way a Mary Sue) Kay Scarpetta is the sexiest, most fashionably dressed Italian evar, has a great house, lots of men who lurve her, and could easily be the most revered chef in history.
PS: She knows who killed Jack the Ripper and she’s not wrong nor obsessed about it and fuck you.